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Retiring from lurker-dom... *edited to add pics*
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I've been pondering at length how and when I would tell my story and I've come to the conclusion that now is the perfect time.
And this is the how:
These are the facts:
Name: Heather
Age: 24
Weight: 285
Height: 5' 7"
Cast of characters: Mike (darling hubby), Hunter (darling 4 year old son), Tessa (darling 2 year old daughter)
How the heck did I get here??!
I was not a chubby child. I grew up moving from town to town all across Texas with my mother and sometimes my father and we were very active and unbeknown to me, poor. I think that lack of luxuries like TVs in our rooms and cable, fast food and other outside food sources is a good defense against becoming fat. (This doesn't prove true in all cases, but it was mine, I think.)
When I was 9 my dad got into yacht brokerage and the money situation improved drastically, unfortunately, my parents already strained marriage reached it's breaking point 2 years later and everything changed. There was no longer time in my mother's schedule for soccer practice, swim team, or fall ball. And so there went the activity that cancelled out my "healthy" appetite. Unfortunately, it did not follow suit. My mother went back to school at night and I was left with the task of dinner for myself and my younger sister. This was usually Rice-a-roni, or spaghetti, or hamburger helper.... you know the standbys. When you split these meals 2 ways between an 12 year old and a 10 year old you can imagine the consequences. Between 11 and 13 I went from a pretty skinny little girl to a just barely under overweight teen. By my sophomore year in high school I was chubby. By graduation I was fat, obese.
Fast forward a few years and you have a girl with a newborn son and no help. My now ex turned out to be a colossal disappointment in every arena (except for genes because I have the sweetest most beautiful son) and left me with devastated self esteem, but I was lucky, because this all happened during my pregnancy and by my son's first birthday I had fallen desperately in love with my best friend who'd loved me all along. Despite his history of skinny, beautiful girlfriends. God blessed us beyond imagination.
I've spent almost the past five years, quite literally hiding behind my children and secretly hating myself. I first considered WLS in 2006 and was planning a lap band, even went through all the certifications with my insurance to have the procedure but was laid off 1 week prior to surgery date. That was a blessing in disguise, knowing now what I didn't know then.
I lost 87 lbs in 2009 and gained every ounce of it back in 2010... That was the final straw. I can't do this for the next 20 years while I grapple with this decision, so I'm going to do it.
I am self pay and as I cannot afford surgery in the states I will be travelling down yonder. My family has given there blessing and support for this, but I still have quite the wait ahead of me. I feel more secure in my decision every day I come on this site and read your stories. My surgery date is August 5th. This gives me time to save all my cash and get my passport in the mail. I will be having surgery on my sister's 23rd birthday and 2 days before my 25th. I am excited beyond measure because at the end of these short months I am facing the first day of the rest of my life.
I won't be the fat mom on the soccer field ever again.
Me and my sister at @ 2 and 4
Me at 7
All the way to the right
After slight weight loss in 2009
Most recent, but I will take better "before" later...