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Any other gay sleevers out there?



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Hey Simon66,

Basically Yazoo71 covered most of what I was going to say on the subject. I'll add a little bit of my own experience to the mix, however.

I was dating a guy for three months this year. I had my surgery in early May and by the first of June he broke up with me. (Maybe he couldn't handle the weight loss?) My point being is that you should do the surgery for you and no one else. If a guy can't accept some loose skin, then do you really need to be with him?

From my own personal experience, I can tell you that my surgery has been life changing and transformative. I feel better. I move better and I have more confidence than I have in years. Like a lot of guys, I spent years on diets losing enormous amounts of weight only to gain it back.

Don't let your dating status define who you are. Make smart choices for yourself and surround yourself with supportive positive people.

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Of course, as much as I can.

I had been researching weight loss surgery for about 5 years before talking to my doctor. He didn't have much information and was not fond of the idea, mainly because I don't think he knew of any patients or very limited few who had had it done. Anyway, reluctantly - he referred me to a local bariatric center and I signed up for the monthly informational seminar. I soon began the process of the 6 month requirements set by my insurance.

So... I KNEW I would lose weight, I KNEW that I would get off at least some of my meds and I KNEW this could greatly extend my life. Honestly, had I not had this and with the weight and yearly gain... I don't think I'd be around another 10 years. I KNEW that it was a permanent restriction.

It's all the things along the way once you've had the surgery that hit me unexpectedly, not in a bad way. I didn't realize how determined I could and would be. I didn't realize the growing confidence and how that would make me feel. When I say confidence, I don't mean ego... it's, for me... at first anyway, a feeling of deeper worth. The feeling of..."YES, I am doing this and I CAN DO THIS." It was a subtlety that others might not have even noticed but I did... and it was a fiercely powerful feeling, even if it wasn't roaring. If that makes any sense. It's all the moment that made and make up the journey. Starting at walking around the block and being winded to walking 26 miles eventually... not because I had to but because I could. It's hiking... actually with friends and not only keeping up but sometimes leading the way. Before, I stopped going with others because I felt as though I held them back and that made me feel very self conscious and guilty. It's seeing and feeling my body change. Each time I would have to get new clothes... I still automaticall walk to the big/tall mens and then I find my way to my regular sizes. When I get clothes now... I still think, "Damn, these look like kids clothes."... it's the wonderment of going through a second adolescents in may way. And ego does creep in a bit... which isn't always bad. I hadn't felt sexy ... maybe ever. I actually feel sexy at times... and it breaks my brain. LOL There are so many things tiny and large but all profound along the way... and those are the things that have really hit home. Its hard to explain but hope that makes a bit more sense. :D

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