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This is it on my way to the hospital

Well I'd like to say yesterday was a nice relaxing day, but it was not. Told my middle daughter about the up coming surgery and she was so angry. It made for a very stressful day. But I did get a good nights sleep and waiting for my ride to the hospital to arrive. Will take some time to pray all goes well, but at this point there is no looking back. My 12 year old granddaughter is going to spend a couple days at my house helping me out, so I bought her a cute pair of Betsey Johnson earrings as a little reward. Well my next post will be post-op! Blessings one and all!

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I wish I could visit with the daughter who upset you. Maybe give her the Lap Band booklet and ask her to not speak negative /or if not positive to remain quiet. I have one negative son who remains quiet (& he is overweight!). Every time I mention a cold or headache he thinks it is my Band. (But now he is silent and it does keep me from asking for sympathy for every little pain. Good huh? I remember when my parents had hours of conversations in regard to their health & it did get boring. Ha!) Anyway, we are here for you & you can talk to us. This sight has some very nice folks checking in and we are in your boat. Happiness & Good health to you in your banding journey. :wub:

I'm sorry you don't have a physical support system, but you have US, your virtual family and support!! Not everyone will understand your choice because not everyone has lived your life and struggles as a big person. I support you 100% in your decision! CONGRATULATIONS and keep moving forward!

I chose to tell no one but my daughter and my husband. My 3 sons know nothing about what I had done over 3 years ago. I feel great, I look great and am so healthy now. I would say to give it time. When your daughter sees how healthy and active you will be afterwards, she will come around. Support is here :)

you know, I was watching extreme weight loss on ABC last night and I cannot believe not only the lack of family support, but the downright sabotage so many people have to deal with from their own family! What is it about food? if you had a drug addiction would they sit right there and light up in front of you? Or worse, would they try to encourage you to as well? Food is no different and I don't understand why family, the people who are supposed to love and support us can't understand that? I am so glad my family does all they can to help me b/c if they didn't I probably would have ended up much heaver than I ever have been. Younger people teens and children deserve a little slack because they can't quite fully conceptualize things even though they can think they know it all! You daughter may just be scared about the actual surgery, going under anesthesia, etc. Also if you just told her the day before it may have just surprised her! Good luck! And this is about you, and don't let anyone try to wreck it!!

Sad to say but people can be very insensitive when it comes to each other. I'm sorry that your daughter is not supportive of your decision but she doesn't have to be. It's not like you're taking her to the surgical ward. This is something you are doing for you and that is wonderful.

Sometimes the focus needs to be on us. We need to take the time and the energy to make an investment in ourselves for our lives and our future and for our families.

Your daughter will come around, she may just be worried about you not knowing all the facts, or even jealous that you are doing something so monumental for yourself.

Take care of you, recover from the surgery feel better and don't focus on any negative stuff. This journey is difficult enough without adding other people's fears to it even when they are our children.

Best of luck to you!

  • Author

Well I am not one happy banded girl! My insurance said I had to stay overnight so I did glad I did got lots of good advice from the medial staff. She also repaired my hiatal hernia I had for 35 years! She also removed a lot of scar tissue from a previous surgery. I feel fantastic! Thank you one and all for your wonderful support what a blessing you are!

Well I am not one happy banded girl! My insurance said I had to stay overnight so I did glad I did got lots of good advice from the medial staff. She also repaired my hiatal hernia I had for 35 years! She also removed a lot of scar tissue from a previous surgery. I feel fantastic! Thank you one and all for your wonderful support what a blessing you are!

Congrats!!!!

My only advice about your daughter is to be kind, and try to talk to her and find out what's going on. It sounds like her anger is covering up some other emotion. Is she scared? Does she feel left out, like you didn't include her? Is she jealous? This can be a bonding moment for you two.

Good luck!

Just remember your having this surgery for YOU... not for your daughter or anyone else. Do you have access to a support group after the surgery... if not maybe start a coffee group.

Tom, Toronto

Banded July 6 06

Wt. Loss: 160 lbs

  • Author

Just remember your having this surgery for YOU... not for your daughter or anyone else. Do you have access to a support group after the surgery... if not maybe start a coffee group.

Tom, Toronto

Banded July 6 06

Wt. Loss: 160

Yes they do have a support group.. They meet monthly. And I totally agree I did this for me!

Try and get to the support group. I host 3 coffee groups a month. It's great to connect with other Bandsters.

Tom, Toronto

Banded July 6 06

Wt. Loss: 160 lbs

Good Job on going through with your surgery... Your daughter will come around.. Mine was a little scared but knew I needed to take care of this problem or I would end up with serious health issues... Support groups are very important as Tom said.. also the folks on this forum have a world of knowledge and support.. Good luck on the recovery.. I had to stay overnight as well but I am so glad I did.

My husband, who is sometimes CRAZY, sometimes GENIUS, demanded they call my insurance and allow me to stay over night. This was his plan initially, and although I didn't contradict him before the surgery, I really thought to myself it wouldn't be necessary and once he saw I was doing so good after surgery, he would say it was ok to come home the same day (plus I didn't want to be far from my nine year old). But BOY was I glad he had a freakin' plan! It worked out for my benefit to stay over night. Now, there was a woman in the other bed next to me that had the surgery maybe two hours before me.... This woman walked out the same day, ALONE, on her own accord, no wheelchair, and walking upright O.O I couldn't believe it. (Btw, she was only 40 lbs overweight- she didn't even look fat)

  • Author

Yes I was glad I stayed the night, I learned a lot more about after care being there. I was in a unit for bariatric patients so they were very helpful. But it is good to be home now. BTW my daughter who was so upset that I was getting banded showed up at my house last nigh with flowers and balloons in hand! I think she was just scared, she also suffers from depression and part of it was the depression. I knew it was going to be difficult with her, but I felt if I didn't tell her and she found out later she would feel betrayed. But all is good now. I'm so glad I did this and that I found this site, I feel so much support here. Have a wonderful day one and all!

Yes I was glad I stayed the night' date=' I learned a lot more about after care being there. I was in a unit for bariatric patients so they were very helpful. But it is good to be home now. BTW my daughter who was so upset that I was getting banded showed up at my house last nigh with flowers and balloons in hand! I think she was just scared, she also suffers from depression and part of it was the depression. I knew it was going to be difficult with her, but I felt if I didn't tell her and she found out later she would feel betrayed. But all is good now. I'm so glad I did this and that I found this site, I feel so much support here. Have a wonderful day one and all![/quote']

It's great she came around to it!! Now, focus on healing! XOXOXO

  • Author

It's great she came around to it!! Now, focus on healing! XOXOXO

Thank you! I must add she even took time to learn my diet so she can help me along the way. And as of today I feel fantastic! Hard to believe I had surgery 3 days ago! Have a blessed day my friend!

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