Hello: I am newly Banded (as of last Wednesday - 07/17). This forum has been so informative for me and I'm very grateful for finding it. So far, I am surprised at how well my post-op has been going without much pain, misery, adjustment, etc. (honestly I expected it to be so awful after reading many posts on here). I go for my first fill on August 13th. I do have some soreness (especially in the belly and around the port incision), some gas (but not painful, just more irritating with an occasional sharp attention getter but nothing horrible) and my incisions are healing well. I'm on Week 1 of "thin liquids" then move on to Week 2 of "thick liquids" and then finally Week 3 of "Mushies". I'm not super hungry and notice that I do go hours without even thinking about being hungry. Today was the first day that I thought I was hungry and I am learning the hard way how much of a habit it is to drink while I eat - which is now a no-no for the foreseeable future. I have what my Dr. called, a "low BMI" (30-31 - depending on who measured my height at the office). I love to cook for friends and entertain - and so much of our social contact with friends is over meals. Now that it is really hitting me that this is how it is going to be from "now on "BUT... here's my big question: DOES IT (LIFE) GET BETTER? How are you all doing with your socializing? I mean, am I always going to live in fear of "throwing up" or "stopping up my stoma" or "basically freaking out about food? I don't want to be unsocial and I want to resume a fun/full life again with my friends. I am okay with eating less - I get that and I'm ready for that - but I guess I'm just now kind of freaking out after having the thought that this Band is going to monopolize my brain and joy from now on. Granted - I am still in the liquid phase which is probably making me seem a little negative tonight (first time since starting this WLS path a few months ago) but I just don't want to be the social leper at parties and such because I am obsessing about this darn Band. DOES IT GET BETTER? DOES IT GET NORMAL? if I'm out - can I have a bite of cake at a birthday party and not obsess about it? Can I go on dates and have wine and a dinner without it being obvious or an issue that I've been Banded. Sorry if this sounds overreacting... any advice from those that have been at this a while would be grateful. Thanks!

I have to disagree. A person with a very high BMI may lose tons of weight when their BMI is in the high 40s or into the 50s. But, the same amount of calorie restriction may not have effect once they've shed a hundred or so pounds. As body weight drops, the number of calories required to maintain that weight also drops. I hear alarm bells when folks start asking about

Doesn't the FDA guidelines for lapband surgery start at a BMi of 40?? Or 35, if co-morbidity is present?

When we go out for lunch it is usually with several other people who have had WLS, so being a social gladfly is not an issue for us. My wife had the vertical sleeve and many of our friends have also had the lapband, as I did. As an aside, I am very impressed with the weight loss my wife was able to achieve with the vertical sleeve. It really controls her appetite. Before that she lost over a hundred pounds by dieting.

I'd agree. I was banded at a higher bmi' date=' but my weight loss has been fairly steady all along. I am now bmi of 24 and am not in any way, shape, or form actively trying to lose weight, but it still comes off.

Even as I have settled into this lifestyle and am not nearly as strict about food or alcohol intake (i do love some mixed drinks myself , I still continue to lose at a decent pace. Heck, at this point I am the ones my friends point to when complaining about skinny people, which completely blows my mind.[/quote']

Thanks NWgirl for this update/input. It is actually good to hear that you lost all your weight and that you continue to lose the weight. That gives me hope to hear! And I love that now you are the "skinny one" in your group. That's got to be such a great turn of events given your hard work and journey - well deserved!

I have to disagree. A person with a very high BMI may lose tons of weight when their BMI is in the high 40s or into the 50s. But' date=' the same amount of calorie restriction may not have effect once they've shed a hundred or so pounds. As body weight drops, the number of calories required to maintain that weight also drops. I hear alarm bells when folks start asking about

Doesn't the FDA guidelines for lapband surgery start at a BMi of 40?? Or 35, if co-morbidity is present?

When we go out for lunch it is usually with several other people who have had WLS, so being a social gladfly is not an issue for us. My wife had the vertical sleeve and many of our friends have also had the lapband, as I did. As an aside, I am very impressed with the weight loss my wife was able to achieve with the vertical sleeve. It really controls her appetite. Before that she lost over a hundred pounds by dieting.[/quote']

My surgeon (who is in the major medical center in Houston and has been doing this for 20 years with many accolades) has a minimum BMI of 29. I believe the FDA (and some insurance companies) has now lowered it to 30.

After I graduated to solids, nothing major has changed as far as social gatherings, having friends over for meals, etc. The biggest change is that I eat WAY less, and much slower than I used to. I always have leftovers to box up. Nothing weird, nothing that affects my ability to be social and eat with a group of people.

You will learn quickly what your band can/can't handle, so I've never been stuck or PB'd in public. If I'm trying something new outside of my home, I take tiny bites and chew like crazy.

When I graduated to mushies, I remember taking my friend out for dinner at a cute little Indian restaurant for her birthday. I was able to eat an entree without rice (most dishes are pureed, or saucy) and gave the paneer to my friend - it was delicious.

You will still have the ability to socialize around food, and be adventurous with your palate, you will just learn to limit yourself and eat slowly, which is totally a good idea anyway.

As far as drinking while eating, I am allowed to drink up until I eat, then I don't until 30 min after eating. I learned quickly not to break that rule, because drinking while eating causes me a lot of discomfort. You will get used to these things and you won't feel sad or left out. If anything, it feels good to no longer be the first one finished eating.

After I graduated to solids' date=' nothing major has changed as far as social gatherings, having friends over for meals, etc. The biggest change is that I eat WAY less, and much slower than I used to. I always have leftovers to box up. Nothing weird, nothing that affects my ability to be social and eat with a group of people.

You will learn quickly what your band can/can't handle, so I've never been stuck or PB'd in public. If I'm trying something new outside of my home, I take tiny bites and chew like crazy.

When I graduated to mushies, I remember taking my friend out for dinner at a cute little Indian restaurant for her birthday. I was able to eat an entree without rice (most dishes are pureed, or saucy) and gave the paneer to my friend - it was delicious.

You will still have the ability to socialize around food, and be adventurous with your palate, you will just learn to limit yourself and eat slowly, which is totally a good idea anyway.

As far as drinking while eating, I am allowed to drink up until I eat, then I don't until 30 min after eating. I learned quickly not to break that rule, because drinking while eating causes me a lot of discomfort. You will get used to these things and you won't feel sad or left out. If anything, it feels good to no longer be the first one finished eating.[/quote']

Thank you LapBandit2013 for this. What you describe is what I was hoping for - I hope to get to that place without much drama.

I have to disagree. A person with a very high BMI may lose tons of weight when their BMI is in the high 40s or into the 50s. But' date=' the same amount of calorie restriction may not have effect once they've shed a hundred or so pounds. As body weight drops, the number of calories required to maintain that weight also drops. I hear alarm bells when folks start asking about

Doesn't the FDA guidelines for lapband surgery start at a BMi of 40?? Or 35, if co-morbidity is present?

When we go out for lunch it is usually with several other people who have had WLS, so being a social gladfly is not an issue for us. My wife had the vertical sleeve and many of our friends have also had the lapband, as I did. As an aside, I am very impressed with the weight loss my wife was able to achieve with the vertical sleeve. It really controls her appetite. Before that she lost over a hundred pounds by dieting.[/quote']

no mam. Well maybe not as long as the individual is paying out of their pocket. I know of a lady here who needed to loose 20#'s.... yes you read it right. Twenty... And she had lap band!

I started w/ bmi of 36.3 and I'm now 23.9. (I'm 14 months post surgery). For me, when I'm out w/ friends I still have eyes that are bigger than my stomach. I have fun and occasionally have some alcohol or a treat, but I try to stay within my daily calorie allotment. Just remember to order the appetizer and not the entree (unless you want to take home a doggy bag)!

I had/have a high BMI so I cannot speak from experience with that point of view. I will say it did get easier for me as time went on and now it is just a way of life. Remember 'deprivation is like dieting'. This is not a diet but more a lifestyle change. Some of us succeed with dieting short term but usually long term it gets us into trouble.

Need to learn to adapt our needs into our necessary life changes in order for this to be successful.

WOW! Bingo! My thoughts exactly Jim!

When I socialize ( eat, drink and just be "normal" ) now....NOBODY would even know...unless I tell them, which I do often. Or maybe when I'm drinking beer. I do that slower now

I'm 100% with Hazel on this. She covered it all.....

Now that I'm 4 months out' date=' there isn't any eating situation that concerns me. If we go out to a restaurant, I order a meal, eat what I can, and either leave the rest or take it home. The ONLY reason you would have a stuck episode, is if you take too big a bite, and don't chew thoroughly. Taking small bites & chewing well isn't obvious to anyone you eat with. You are eating.....that's all they see. As Hazel said, if your social life involves drinking on a regular basis, you will have problems losing weight. There is not a lot of room for regular alcohol intake on any weight loss plan, because there aren't any nutrients and your body can only store it as fat. That, and drinking brings on loose eating for many; it does for me! If you DO drink, count the calories, and make sure you don't consistently blow your daily allowance. Maintenance is another story, but it doesn't mean that you can throw caution to the wind.

Relax, and take the time necessary to "reset" as Hazel mentions, and get re-aquainted with food, and what will ultimately be your new "normal".

Good luck![/quote']

O

You can still host dinner parties. Just play with your food. Take recipes you have and make them work for your new healthy lifestyle. The thing I worry about is as a person who loves cooking and thought about going to culinary school I know everything needs to be tasted and I taste as I cook...a...lot.