Pre-op, not dieting and friends are "concerned". Help!

[Constance 0]

I have probably another 3 or 4 months before I have surgery. My BMI is a hair over 40, and I need to keep it there for my next doctor visits. (We all know how screwed up this is, not to mention unhealthy. But that is a whole other thread).

Anyway, my friends and family are all up in my business because they see I am not dieting and, well, I'm heavier than ever. I have decided not to talk about the sugery for many reasons. Is there anything I can say to get them to leave me alone? To be fair, they are used to seeing me ALWAYS on some new "plan" or working out like a freak, however periodically. So for me to just eat normal food and be bigger than ever is unusual for them.

How can I get them off my back and not feel so self-conscious during these next few months? It is bad enough that I AM heavier than ever. But to have people remind me of it AND know that I can't talk about the surgery is so hard. It's like I feel like I need an excuse for not doing something. :phanvan

[Yoda 0]

can I have your autograph!!

hehe.

I dunno....tell them "thanks, but I have a long term plan".

Or..."lets talk about something else".....

I know they mean well...but....maaan, they are bein' snoopy!!! LOL

[PhotoNut 7]

A famous person eh? *grabs the camera to take photos for the Inquirer*

I like Yoda's idea. "I'm taking a break from dieting, but I do have a long term plan so it's all good."

Or you could just eyeball their plate and say, "Are you going to eat that?" as you reach for some of their food. *grins*

[Constance 0]

Haha! you guys are funny. I'm not famous, I just wanted more anonymity with that whole Google thing. I just thought it was a funny reason to change my name. Like *I* need anonymity? It seems so silly -- but it's true!

Anyway...I think people just want to be helpful but it sucks when my Mom says "Sweetie Pie, what are you doing about your weight?"

What I WANT to say is "Mom, what are you doing about you lack of tact?"

[Yoda 0]

What I WANT to say is "Mom, what are you doing about you lack of tact?"

Okay, now THAT'S a GOOD one....do it!!!!!!

[3loves 0]

Tell them it's obvious the toll that yo-yo dieting takes on one's body and your taking a short break. However, they need not to worry, but should watch out for some BIG changes on the horizon. Then tell them you are SO excited about your future.

Keep'em wondering and then YOUR in the driver's seat.

[Marimaru 7]

"I have a plan, but I'm taking a break first."

There's a good amount of suggestions here. I can see why you don't want to talk about your surgery, and I can see how that would make your current situation so difficult.

Good luck

[FunnyDuddies 6]

Tell them that you need to not be in "diet mode" when you have surgery so that you can heal properly, and that you and your doctor have discussed the issue, and leave it at that. If they pry more say "Its complicated and I'd rather not dwell on it all right now"

[Tricia K. 0]

I think some of the other suggestions are good but, personally, I would just tell them that it's none of their business. And then, just smile and walk away.

[MeganA 35]

I'd say- "Thanks for the concern...but just wait and see!"

Megan

[HeatherGurl 0]

I think some of the other suggestions are good but, personally, I would just tell them that it's none of their business. And then, just smile and walk away.

I am with Tricia on this one!

[seminole 0]

RED hair,

lIVE YOUR LIFE AND DO WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU. DO NOT WORRY ABOUT THE OTHERS.....IF THEY ARE NOT PAYING FOR YOU THEN WHO CARES WHAT THEY SAY?

[Ceparano 0]

I'd tell them that you've seen a specialist and he is very concerned about your past history of yo-yo dieting. He doesn't want you "dieting" while you under go various testing, and that after your testing he has a wls plan for you to follow. That should help to stretch out the 3-4 month time line, because one always has to wait to schedule various testing. I hope you find a solution that works for you. It's hard to deal with that kind of pressure, especially when you have already made your decision.

Roberta

[stefunny 0]

I'm having a similar problem. I need to gain 3 pounds by June 16th to have the surgery. My family is appalled and don't think I should do it if it means I have to gain weight. I've tried to explain to them gaining 3 pounds to lose 60-70 is worth it! Then to add to it... I'm having trouble gaining weight! But, I have about 5 weeks so until then I'm on the "Last Supper Diet"!