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This was one of the most interesting posts that I have read since being on here. I've struggled with the question in your title for quite some time. Basically food has been my soother. I've found thoughts I've never had before have come bubbling to the surface. The difference now I think is that I turn 40 this year...my confidence is great...and I welcome that thought process now. I used to be scared of it! Its basically time to deal with this and put it away and live my life the way it is supposed to be lived. I answer my self doubt now with confidence and gusto...I am me...just able to do ANYTHING I set my mind to...like ziplining, riding in a plane comfortably, and knowing that I made the choice to be that way.

Thank you all for your amazing stories...what a great read...its like I wrote a book of my innermost thoughts!

Have a great day...and to all you moms out there...have the best day ever...you deserve it!!

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Skinny and Healthy

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Been fat since I was 6, hated every minute of it, but food was the drug that I used to feel better. Who will you be if your are not fat, I don't know and neither do you. BUT, if you do it the right way, you will never believe the person you can become. I have only lost 50% of my EW but already I am accomplishing things that I never could, and it is only going to get better.

I got fat when I was 6 as well. I was a fat kid with all the hangs ups that go with it. When I was 9, my mother took me to a diet doctor. He put my on amphetamines and Water pills. Mind you, this was 1964, and they didn't know what they know now about amphetamines. I lost some weight, but didn't maintain it. It wasn't until high school that I dropped 50 pounds without drugs. I got all kinds of attention; wonderful, and confusing.

I've taken diet pills on and off (what seems like) my entire life. The 90 pounds I lost 14 years ago was with drugs, and when I was 25, I lost a ton of weight with them as well. I actually got a bit too thin, but in the mirror, I still saw more weight to lose. It got to the point where the pills could no longer hold back the wild horse inside of me, and back came the weight. Up and down UP and down.......ya'll know the story. I've gone to those pills at so many different times, but like with anything else, many times I just ate right through them. I feel that this surgery is my last chance; one that I can live with for the rest of my days.

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This was one of the most interesting posts that I have read since being on here. I've struggled with the question in your title for quite some time. Basically food has been my soother. I've found thoughts I've never had before have come bubbling to the surface. The difference now I think is that I turn 40 this year...my confidence is great...and I welcome that thought process now. I used to be scared of it! Its basically time to deal with this and put it away and live my life the way it is supposed to be lived. I answer my self doubt now with confidence and gusto...I am me...just able to do ANYTHING I set my mind to...like ziplining, riding in a plane comfortably, and knowing that I made the choice to be that way.

Thank you all for your amazing stories...what a great read...its like I wrote a book of my innermost thoughts!

Have a great day...and to all you moms out there...have the best day ever...you deserve it!!

You go girl!!! I love it :)

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Your post reminds me of another post last year:

" In my case, the most fearful thing I had to do in order to succeed with my band wasn't switching to skim milk, surviving a liquid diet, or giving up bread. The most fearful thing was giving up my emotional attachment to food. In the nearly 5 years since I was banded, I've made a lot of progress with that, but the attachment is still there. It forms one of the innermost layers of my turtle shell. Working on that layer will probably be a lifetime job for me. At times I'm not even sure I truly want to get rid of it altogether. At times I'm afraid that if I shed my shell completely, I won't be able to survive. On the other hand, I seem to be doing fine without that thick old b***h layer. So I'm going to pay attention to my dreams rather than my fears and pray for a miracle. And why not? It can't hurt to try!"

Good post..... There is SO much psychology wrapped up in a lifetime of obesity. After going around in circles with this my entire life, I still feel like "what will I do without my protective layer". Weight isn't JUST a manifestation of overeating. It serves another purpose.....and THAT is where a lot of the mental work comes in. You have to be ready to "let go" of the weight, and be prepared to deal with all the reasons for holding onto it.

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Whats wrong with a new YOU! A skinny body and a better quality of life.

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    • Aunty Mamo

      Iʻm roughly 6 weeks post-op this morning and have begun to feel like a normal human, with a normal human body again. I started introducing solid foods and pill forms of medications/supplements a couple of weeks ago and it's really amazing to eat meals with my family again, despite the fact that my portions are so much smaller than theirs. 
      I live on the island of Oʻahu and spend a lot of time in the water- for exercise, for play,  and for spiritual & mental health. The day I had my month out appointment with my surgeon, I packed all my gear in my truck, anticipating his permission to get back in the ocean. The minute I walked out of that hospital I drove straight to the shore and got in that water. Hallelujah! My appointment was at 10 am. I didn't get home until after 5 pm. 
      I'm down 31 pounds since the day of surgery and 47 since my pre-op diet began, with that typical week long stall occurring at three weeks. I'm really starting to see some changes lately- some of my clothing is too big, some fits again. The most drastic changes I notice however are in my face. I've also noticed my endurance and flexibility increasing. I was really starting to be held up physically, and I'm so grateful that I'm seeing that turn around in such short order. 
      My general disposition lately is hopeful and motivated. The only thing that bugs me on a daily basis still is the way those supplements make my house smell. So stink! But I just bought a smell proof bag online that other people use to put their pot in. My house doesn't stink anymore. 
       
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Oh yeah, something I wanted to rant about, a billing dispute that cropped up 3 months ago.
      Surgery was in August of 2023. A bill shows up for over $7,000 in January. WTF? I asks myself. I know that I jumped through all of the insurance hoops and verified this and triple checked that, as did the surgeon's office. All was set, and I paid all of the known costs before surgery.
      A looong story short, is that an assistant surgeon that was in the process of accepting money from my insurance company touched me while I was under anesthesia. That is what the bill was for. But hey, guess what? Some federal legislation was enacted last year to help patients out when they cannot consent to being touched by someone out of their insurance network. These types of bills fall under something called, "surprise billing," and you don't have to put up with it.
      https://www.cms.gov/nosurprises
      I had to make a lot of phone calls to both the surgeon's office and the insurance company and explain my rights and what the maximum out of pocket costs were that I could be liable for. Also had to remind them that it isn't my place to be taking care of all of this and that I was going to escalate things if they could not play nice with one another.
      Quick ending is that I don't have to pay that $7,000+. Advocate, advocate, advocate for yourself no matter how long it takes and learn more about this law if you are ever hit with a surprise bill.
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Some days I feel like an infiltrator... I'm participating in society as a "thin" person. They have no idea that I haven't always been one of them! 🤣
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    • ChunkCat

      Thank you everyone for your well wishes! I totally forgot I wrote an update here... I'm one week post op today. I gained 15 lbs in water weight overnight because they had to give me tons of fluids to bring my BP up after surgery! I stayed one night in the hospital. Everything has been fine except I seem to have picked up a bug while I was there and I've been running a low grade fever, coughing, and a sore throat. So I've been hydrating well and sleeping a ton. So far the Covid tests are negative.
      I haven't been able to advance my diet past purees. Everything I eat other than tofu makes me choke and feels like trying to swallow rocks. They warned me it would get worse before it gets better, so lets hope this is all normal. I have my follow up on Monday so we'll see. Living on shakes and soup again is not fun. I had enough of them the first time!! LOL 
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    • BeanitoDiego

      Still purging all of the larger clothing. This morning, a shirt that I ADORED wearing ended up on top. Hard to let it go, but it was also hard to let go of those habits that also no longer serve my highest good. Onward and upward!
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