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Darkkyss' Blog
 

My Dad Stopped By!

I was not planning on doing another blog so soon but my dad stopped by, he seen me right before surgery but he was leaving town! ( I did the don't change your plans I will be fine speech) He stated "wow, I can tell sis" I know that I was down almost 20 lbs before the surgery, but seems these last 10lbs were the ones that you could start to notice more in my face and stomach!   Can we say roller coaster day!!!!!!! Today is the first day I felt like I had energy and the day I decide to cry at ever drop??? Go figure LOL   My grandma "second mom, best friend" past away in December and I wished she was here to watch this transformation she would be so happy, She never said one unkind word my whole life about my weight, but I know she worried, she herself was over weight and struggled up and down for years. You just wanna kick yourself for not doing earlier.   My son I miss so much, I keep telling myself at least he is not in Afgan anymore, which makes me so happy but he is stationed in Germany so far away. Sounds like he might be home in Nov. he is supppose to be stationed in the states by then. What will he say, his momma under 200lbs lol, he has not seen that in years. He sends message almost daily which does help! I get these kind of messages from my wonderful boy "awesome job momma" "way to go" "you can do it" and the usual miss you and love you ...... Got this text yesterday... what you at now ma? I told him I was 233 and I kept waiting for a reply and nothing... I was kind of bummed all the sudden my phone rang and it was HIM!!!! He was happy he decided to call me! really made my day yesterday.   30lbs really?????????? OMG did the lil happy dance, swear my Sissie( my lil d-o-g, that in itself is another story LOL) gave me a you are crazy look. Later in the day she layed in my lap FIRST TIME EVER!!!!!! So a lil about Sissie, she is called a Munchkin she is about 6lbs cutest lil thing you ever seen, was a Christmas present because I was not dealing well with my son being gone. I would cry at least weekly. My other half (Marc) bought her for me. I was able to visit with her for 3 weeks before she was able to come home to us. I even slept with a blanket for a few days then took it over to her so she would sleep with my smell and get used to it(ok I know I am weird but anyone out there with a "child" pet knows what I am saying) She came home on Dec 21st. She was so tiny, her colors have changed completely I will attatch a couple different pictures of her for your viewing. Well lets just saying I would have never said in my life time my Sissie would be a child, I used to tease my mom all the time when she had her dog 13 years and would spoil it so bad! Marc and I joke all the time that Sissie is not a real d-o-g!   WOW can you say rambling, My family teases me all the time because we were in the car on a road trip and I was rambling on and all the sudden I said "bird" and pointed....... and then just continued my converstation like it was no big deal. Well now its a standard joke when I start rambling and change the subject with out notice, they will go Bird!!!!   Have a great Tuesday, I see light at the end of this big long tunnel!! Here is a few pictures 1st is Sissie Jan 2, she shy 2 days of being 2 months old, the second is my son Ryan, third what Sissie looks like now, cutest lil girl ever!
Darkkyss

Darkkyss

1
reignoftara's Blog
 

Can't Shake It......

So tomorrow I am 3 weeks post op and I am so tired all the time. I can't seem to get all my protein or my fluids in. I know this contributes to my fatigue. Has anybody else experienced this? Sometimes I wonder what I did to myself. I know that it will get better with time but right now I just need some energy and it's making me depressed. I am happy I got sleeved don't get me wrong and I am optimistic about the future but right now it's tough. When will it get better? Is anyone else experiencing this?
reignoftara

reignoftara

5
worm2872's Blog
 

Diet So Far... Not Good But Not Bad

I started my diet on 8-17. I did well the first few days then I was traveling for a week. It was a slow downward spiral. I had lost three pounds and gained them back. But... I can say the cookie eating in the hotel was not there. Which I was proud of myself for. I ate very healthy but I was still over the 1400 calories per day. I kind of took this weekend off and I am back on track today. It is such a hard process. I need to get my head in the game. I have to meet with my surgoen next Tuesday and I want SOME weight off even if it is just 2 pounds.   I will say I am really scared about my weight going up. I am really trying to drink water and plan meals. I travel almost all of Sept. It is going to be brutal. Maybe I should limit myself to protein bars and then a regular dinner?? It would at least track the calories.   One thing I can say that has been positive is I have been taking vitimins with iron. They are Flintstones but this is a major milestone for me. Iron has always made me really sick. So that is one worry off of my mind.
worm2872

worm2872

0
V's Journey
 

Hospital Experience & 10 Days Post Op

So I am 10 days post op and I've lost 9lbs since surgery, making it a total of 24.6 lbs total with pre-op. I am feeling great and have been following my diet. I can eat creamy soups, mashed potatoes, apple sauce and yogurt. I get full really fast and will stop as soon as I get that feeling, I don't want to overdue it.   My surgery and hospital experience went good. I had no complications and was up and walking that same night. Dr. Verboonen and his staff are great, specially my nurse Ana Maria. She is very knowledgeable and took care of me very well.
MissVVJJ

MissVVJJ

3
Jenhort's Blog
 

Finally Below 250!

geesh, finally below 250! So happy, I havent been below 250 in such a long time.....20 years! lol. Finally broke thru this plateau too! I wasn't too worried about this standstill because I know I have been doing the right things, and I am just enjoying this ride. It is the journey that has been really fulfilling for me, lots of appreciation and enjoyment of life.
Jenhort

Jenhort

0
PrincezzSondra's Blog
 

Need Help Asap. Something Tells Me I Stretched My Stomach. Any Suggestions?

Ok so i was in a bad accident they took the fluid out so i gained all my weight back bc i was completely immobile for 2 1/2yrs and have to learn to walk again. But while they took the fluid out they made sure I had all these vitamins and made me eat all these meals everyday bc they were afraid my body would shut down bc i always needed blood transfusions and kidney stones 3 different times during all this. so i gained all my weight back and even though i have the fluid back its like its not there. Im always hungry. I can eat like if i dont have the band it just goes down slow or gets stuck till i take a breath. I hate it so obviously i stretched my stomach out but what do i do... it would help so much with my therapy progress if i lost my weight and would not be as strenuous on my body and legs if i was lighter. both feet and left leg were broken which are still healing. since i suffered severe nerve damage all this weight.... well lets just say i am definitely feeling it. and i would like to be able to do more with my daughter and fiance. he wants to pick me up and help me but i dont want to hurt his back. I am back at my starting weight plus 2lbs. i lost 40lbs and it came back... i want to cry all the time. i feel helpless.
PrincezzSondra

PrincezzSondra

3
missv2012's Blog
 

Jealous Friends/family And Wls

I have a very attractive female friend who always loves to get the attention. When I was slimmer she couldnt light a match to me but when I blew up like a balloon that seemed to make her happier or less say feel superior over me. I hate I told her about the surgery now she is always saying ."You can loose that weight your just lazy," or when "people see you they must associate you with food." All that smack talk from her has made me resent her and unfortunatley cut all ties with her. I cant wait to have this surgery and be smaller than her. LoL I'm just venting. Im 222 5'1 My goal weight is 125!!!!
missv2012

missv2012

9
missv2012's Blog
 

Smoking And The Gastric Sleeve

I am approaching my last month for supervised diet and my weight has actually increased. I will have to meet with my surgeon on the 4th of Sept and the meet with the nutritionist. I think this whole insurance red tape is just a mess. I am 222 at 5'1 but I smoke they told me to stop smoking 8 weeks prior to surgery. I just stopped yesterday I dont smoke cigarettes, I smoke black and mild cigars once a day and its the short cigar not the standard size. Will they be able to tell with a urine test. Can I just tell them I stopped or how long does nicotine stay in your system? ANY RECOMMENDATIONS ?
missv2012

missv2012

3
Darkkyss' Blog
 

Sunday!

Well I feel like it has taken 2 days to get over going to the Dr. Friday. I have truly learned my lesson on making sure I eat enough during the day!   I went shopping at walmart today, dang that store is BIG! LOL.......   I am trying different protein drinks, everything taste TERRIBLE... I know its just me right now. I spent 14.00 to try this "new" stuff stated taste like watermelon, excited right! I love watermelon flavor..... thinking woohoo 42 grams of protein I can sip on this all day.. OMG is all I can say, 1 sip and I about threw up. So darn sweet ewww, sigh...   Trying different pureed foods, boy does it change the taste of the food! I did find clam chowder was ok LOTS of the liquid and little bit of the potato's and clams. cream of wheat is something I can eat but takes me 2 meals per packet. I did buy 1 jar of baby food we will see if I get the nerve to try "herbal chicken and paste stage 3" lol   I just want to add, my other half has been so great! I honestly don't think I could have done this without him. I have had some rough days and he has been so awesome on helping out in every way.   234.4lbs
Darkkyss

Darkkyss

0
rabrijumo's Blog
 

My Story Copied Over From My Blogger Blog: My Wt Loss Journey

My name is Rachael. I am a mother, a nurse, and a very fat person. I was given my first diet pill at age 10 by my mother... I couldn't take pills so I struggled to get the huge pill down. I don't know that I ever did or that it worked or if I even really needed it! I see pictures of my self and I am a bit chubby but not obese at all at that age. I remember being teased about being fat and large at an early age. I remember carving the word fat into my arm at around 12 years old. I remember hating my body and thinking my life would be perfect if I weren't fat. Years flow by I am in high school I am 5 7 my wt a HUGE 155. In retrospect that isn't that tall or fat but at the time I felt unattractive. I had a period at age 16 were I had a lot of dates no sex but boys asked me out and told me I was pretty....... I did have big boobs and a full soft figure. I think I undervalued myself in some respects but was a fun, gregarious person. I met the man I eventually married he seemed to think I was attractive. We moved in together 2 years later. I did my first "successful" diet at age 20 . It was a liquid protein diet run by a doctor. My dad paid for it and I achieved my ideal weight of 130 lbs. I bought a tiny bikini short skirts and tight jeans. I went to community college for 2 years then nursing school. By the time a graduated in 1983 I had regained the wt I lost plus 30 or 40 lbs. I married at age 22 wt 170 ish ....continued to gain year after year hitting 270 when I got pregnant for the first time. I lost wt during the pregnancy but regained during breast feeding. Rinse and repeat x 2 more kids over 7 years. At age 33 I was 300 plus lbs but active and healthy. Years flow by my life hits a snag or two my husband developed into an alcoholic and we have marriatal problems. We split for the first time when I was 38 wt 345 lbs 3 kids ages 12, 7, and 5. Living as a single mom for a year was hard we got back together kind of to buy a nice house in VA and be a family. The difference was we kept separate rooms. I had become used to sleeping by myself reading if I wanted to and did not want to hear my husband snore or reek of alcohol. I am tired that's the beginning of my history more soon.   A few days later I added a second installment :   Today I am thinking about why I decided to have the surgery. I have become increasingly UNABLE. I can not: walk up stairs, walk any distance comfortably, fly comfortably, ride a bike, get up from a sitting position with anything like ease, and take care of myself alone. I have a laundry list of things I want to be able to do a BUCKET list if you will. Chase my grandson walk up or down stairs without a rail fly to Africa on a mission ride a bike take a hike buy a small car and fit in it ride a motorcycle Meet someone and be attractive enough to attract them   I sometimes want to do a skit like Jeff Foxworthy (not that its very funny) YOU MIGHT BE MORBIDLY OBESE IF you can't wipe yourself without hurting your wrist you can't climb a stair without a reinforced rail get up out of a low couch without assistance well you get the idea i have a million and they all make me want to cry life as a fat person in America is not much fun .....the ridicule is one thing ......the discomfort of chairs that bind you is another...... and the comments people feel free to make is yet another. Yes I am responsible for my situation I know that but it does not make me sub human or less valuable as a person. I know I have lost friends, one in particular that I relate to my weight and my inabilities. This makes me sad and mad.     A few days and thoughts later........ I find out my surgery date next week. Today I hurt my leg walking into work. I did not fall I was just walking and my right calf pulled or charley horsed maybe my Achilles tendon. Whatever it was it has crippled me worse then I have been ever! I so did not need another obstacle to exercising sigh. I am ready to do this. I have a lot of questions about the surgery itself How long will I be in the hospital? How much recovery time will I need before I can return to work? How my much pain will there be? How will my body feel inside? Will I have control of my bowels and will I vomit a lot? I think I will visit the blue point website and attend a support group this week. I must get ready to get ready     I am a disappointment to my children though they love me they worry about me when they should not have to. They miss being able to do things with me or having to do things for me. They want a Mom they can count on and not have to worry about. I want them to have that as well. That's why I am doing this surgery to be ABLE.
rabrijumo

rabrijumo

0
rabrijumo's Blog
 

Trials And Tribulations At The Drs Office But I Have A Date

I need to express concern and frustration. I rescheduled an appointment a month ago but I misplaced my organizer so I put the new appointment into my phone then added it later to my organizer. Only I forgot to cross out the original appointment scheduled today Friday the 20th. I tried to call the office before I went at 851am but the phone rolled over To the message : office hours are 9-5. So I go and the receptionist says I indeed do Not have an appointment my appointment is the 24 th at 930 am. I mention I tried to call. She says" oh no I opened the phones at 830". I looked at my phone it shows I made the call at 851am she says "no no no the phone was ringing and being answered then". Ok wtf is the point of saying that to me? It came off so rude and she did it over and over. I left disgruntled not because I wasted my time but because of her attitude. This is making me nervous about the office staff. It's not the first time I have had an issue. When trying to schedule my counseling appointments which I have to pay out of pocket for the receptionist interrupted our scheduling to say she had to do something else and someone else would have to help me. She then answered the phone and scheduled someone else. I got upset because it was complicated confusing and she dumps me for another call. I walked out. This process is anxiety producing enough with out this crap from the staff. I thought everyone would be more encouraging and supportive and not nasty and confrontational. I might mention that I was not blaming them in anyway for the issue today that was all me. simply why in the world did she keep negating or denying that I had got their machine that morning. Seriously sigh     Today started off well traffic wasn't to bad since my fiasco last week (see previous post) I "knew" my appointment was at 930am I got there at 915 went to the bathroom first signed in at 930 and sat until called when I di my day went down hill fast. The very nice scheduler said my appointment was at 900 am and the nutritionist had a 930 already. She said she was confused about which visit this was for me since she was on maternity leave when I started and my 3 month program was not set up right. I stood there and and started saying but I was here Friday and she told me my appointment was for 930. Then I did something I haven't done in literally years I burst into tears. The sweet receptionist took me into a private room and straighten out my "program" the scheduler Pam set up my surgery appointment , I got to see not only the nutritionist but the nurse practitioner for my " second" appointment ( the pre op exam and review). While the end result is I have my date I got some questions answered and reassurance from the staff I cried a lot and melted down completely which for me is not a comfortable feeling. When I was a new RN I cried when faced with any confrontation and I hated it. I trained my self not to cry in front of people of authority and to stand up for myself. I became a strong voice in my career so this breakdown brings back bad memories of a weaker self. I felt better when I left went to work and remained a little fragile all day. I cried a few times ( in private) but I made it through the day. I work tmr but have the rest of the week off for my birthday. Oh I forgot I freaking gained 2 lbs so they are pressuring me big time to lose 45 lbs before surgery. I have started my fitness pal and data entering all I eat it is working to curb my binging as I don't like entering to much lol I am being brutally honest and entering everything I eat. My plan is to begin low carb in earnest Monday kind of a modified Atkins because that the only diet I have ever tried that helps me resist sweets and that I feel strong and healthy while I do it.  
rabrijumo

rabrijumo

1
rabrijumo's Blog
 

Some Thoughts On Why

I gave myself to age 50 to lose the wt on my own and I failed major I have become so big I am almost crippled. So the decision is made the date is set and I am getting the gastric bypass. I wish it were sooner then September 25th but I have a little time to get some wt off ha ha ha. I know my doctor wants me to lose 35-40 lbs before surgery but if I could do that why would  I need surgery? I am going to try and at least do the optifast for an extra week(they require 2 weeks prior to surgery). What I am doing now is using my fitness pal to enter my daily intake , it is helping me to snack less and become aware of my snacking patterns, emotional eating, and types of food I eat. Since it was my birthday I did have chocolate cake and ice cream but I did eat smaller portions of my bday dinner and my slice of cake was also smaller then I usually would take. Today I am not having any cake but I did have a small ice cream bar. I plan to focus on my "diet" in a few weeks. I am also using online support groups to ask questions and get encouragement from others photos and stories. I will need to make a counseling appointment and start going to the support group on weds nights.
rabrijumo

rabrijumo

0
rabrijumo's Blog
 

My Comorbidities : Conditions And Meds And Wt Loss Plan

AGE: 51  WT: 448   HT 5 7   BMI 70   MOTHER of 3 GRANDMOTHER of 1    RN   HYPERTENSION/ ATRIAL FIBRILLATION diagnosed with bp 2002 atrial fib 2004 MEDICATIONS: Sotalol - antiarrhythmic and BP Diltiazem - as needed during episodes of afib (so I don't have to go to the hospital) Coumadin - anticoagulant to prevent clots during episodes of afib (again so I don't have to go to the ER and get lovenox) HCTZ - diuretic for BP KDUR - potassium supplement/ Magnesium supplement -  from diuretic use if my potassium or magnesium gets low I have additional arrhythmias , also Fish Oil (stopped baby asa daily per my cardiologist this year) ***after my recent(today is 8/27) 4 episodes of fib in 3 weeks I changed my cardiac meds to Tikosyn and a daily dose of diltiazem for my blood pressure and discontinued sotalol and HCTZ.***    DIABETES TYPE 2 diagnosed October 2005 MEDICATIONS: Actos and Glipizide plus cinnamon supplement   ARTHRITIS/ BACK, KNEES, AND SHOULDER pain diagnosed 1991 MEDICATIONS:  Motrin 800mg twice a day, Percocet (oxycodone) 5-10mg daily at night, Tramadol as needed for pain, and Benadryl w/percocet (because percocet makes me a little itchy)   SLEEP APNEA- Use CPAP machine nightly rated as severe setting 14   My plan to lose wt pre op   Step 1 Data entry everything I eat being brutally honest and writing down EVERYTHING Using myfitnesspal Time limit: August 14,2012   Step 2 will be to eliminate the sweets and keep track and decrease carbs. Time limit 8/14-21   Step 3 low carb no sweets 8/14-9/4 Step three if I haven't lost at least 25 lbs by sept 4th do an extra week of optifast. Time limit: if needed start 9/4   Step 4 optifast 2 weeks prior to surgery. Time limit 9/11-24     Step 5 surgery! 9/25
rabrijumo

rabrijumo

0
neener's Blog
 

Coming To Terms With The Idea Of Wls

So I'm definitely considering sleeve surgery, enough that I have signed up with an account and started a blog. But things strike me as I think out this process and I'm wondering if anyone else has felt/thought the same things I am feeling/thinking.   Tomorrow I meet with my family practicioner doctor to talk about a 3 month weight loss plan that will make my health insurance happy so I can have the surgery. I'm kinda scared that the dr will just say to me "well have you thought about diet and exercise?" I'm kind of expecting that answer from him because he seems the type. The problem is that I need his recommendation for my insurance to approve the surgery. Has anyone else had a problem with their doctor being less than supportive about WLS?   Also I am thinking about who I would tell if I did get surgery. My husband also struggles and would probably have the surgery at some point as well, so he's very supportive as I am the guinea pig he's eagerly watching. However I have had friends and family who I know are not going to be supportive. Like our marathon running friends who recommended to me and my hubby that we "walk around the block two times a night every night to lose weight". I just keep thinking that if I was anorexic nobody would tell me to "just eat". Everyone knows it's a lot harder than that. So why do people tell me to "just stop eating" when I'm overweight? Crazy.   So let's see how tomorrow goes. Wish me luck that my doctor will be understanding and supportive of what I want to do or I might be looking for another one. Hopefully if all goes well I'll be looking at surgery sometime in December. Just in time for a New Years resolution and new body! :-)
neener

neener

2
rabrijumo's Blog
 

Painful Yet Inspiring Thoughts

I live  in Washington DC , city living is not designed for obese people. Parking is a bear I hate it but when I get a good spot it does make my day lol. That's another thing I will enjoy: not worrying if I have to park far because the walking won't be painful! A painful situation  happened to me last year. I am a nurse and I have worked in labor and delivery for 18 years, it is my calling. last year I moved back here from TN and tried to do a travel assignment but was not mobile enough and they fired me. It was horribly painful physically trying to keep up and emotionally when I failed. I got a Full time night shift job at the hospital I had worked in before I moved to TN in 2007. Nights was hard and my ability to be fast enough came up after 6 months during a time I had become infected with MRSA. I was put on leave, paid fortunately, due to the infection.  then I got THE call from my boss and human resources questioning my physical ability to perform my job. They kept me on paid leave while they decided what to do with me eventually sending me to a desk job 9-5 in PST pre surgical testing. There I call patients before surgery to obtain a history and advise them on medications and directions to the unit. I really like the hours and the people are very nice. But I feel like a failure. In the end it is the best thing for me right now. I really answer to no one as I am still on L& D's payroll so I can go to doc appts and take vacation whenever I need. Also It's really nice to be on days. I hated nights especially where I live. Because I was going with major traffic both directions which sucked after working a 12 hour night shift.  So all in all this Job is helping me to attain my goal to have the RNY surgery and achieve my wt loss. Things do work out the way they are supposed to. That's my story and I am sticking to it lol! I am hopefully experiencing the LAST of a number of things: The last time I come to the beach on vacation and have fear of being able to get out of the ocean The last time I slow the family down  The last time I am unable to help chase the baby down especially because we will soon have two babies in  the house   PS It occurs to me that I need to lose not only a full person (in body wt) but indeed to lose  a FAT person. Which philosophically speaking is just what I need to do LOSE a FAT person physically and mentally. 
rabrijumo

rabrijumo

0
lovealways' Blog
 

"omfg Wait...you're Having What Type Of Surgery"?

Yup! You heard right! Weight loss surgery. Gastric Bypass to be exact! Am I excited? More than ever. Am I ashamed? Not in the least.   If there's anything you should know about me, you should know I can't keep a secret. I can't keep things to myself, especially exciting things. Everyone in my life knows not to tell me anything, because I always end up spilling the beans sooner or later. It always starts out this way. I'll tell one person one thing and then think to myself, well, I already told one person, so why not tell another? One person becomes two, two becomes three, and so on and so forth. This is how it happened over the weekend while traveling by bus to NYC for my first day of graduate classes with my long time classmates. These are girls I've been in the same intense undergrad program with for two years. We're also potential social workers, so they're used to hearing about life transitions and making big decisions, etc. so I kind of felt comfortable with them knowing my "secret". Plus, I figure they're going to be wondering why I'm absent from classes for a week, and wtf is going on with me when I start shedding the weight.   So, I told them! I told them all! It kind of just slipped out. I finally got to the NYC campus for my first day of grad classes, and noticed the desks were unbearably tiny (despite paying $30k a year, guys) and decided why panic? This will all be over soon! I'm proud of my decision to get the surgery. I have nothing to hide. I *have* tried every diet, been successful, unsuccessful, gained, lost, gained, etc. I know myself well enough to know this is something I want and need. Plus, I think by telling people rather than keeping it a secret, it helps to reduce the stigma attached to weight loss surgery and being obese in general.   Typical bullshit responses I've gotten so far: Oh, well, my father's friend's mother's aunt got the surgery, lost a TON of weight, but regained everything back after like...3 years!
Oh, gastric bypass? So you'll never eat again and be on a strict diet for the rest of your life? Oh, I see.
They do WHAT to your stomach??
I hear you're going to spend the rest of your life throwing up...you don't want that
One of my co-workers gained all the weight back and more. She eats McDonalds every day on her lunch break...and gained all the weight back...you don't want that, do you?
You'll never be able to eat pizza again and all that good stuff.
Maybe you should try another diet? I hear the FDA is approving a new weight loss pill this fall!
You know..maybe if you just try exercising you may be able to lose some of the weight
You're going to be needing iron infusions for the REST of your life
  So I have a few answers for this people...   I'm NOT your father's friend's mother's aunt's sister's boyfriend's uncle...I'm ME Yes, I know what I'm doing No, you can't change my mind Yes, I've researched And YES, I'm ready to begin a new life!
lovealways

lovealways

9
cadezma77's Blog
 

From "fluffy" To Thinner Back To Fluffy.....depressing!

I have been feeling very depressed lately and can feel myself slipping back into my old behaviors, not eating related. It's more to do with anxiety and avoiding people. Since I was younger I have always had issues with social anxiety. As I gained weight the anxiety worsened. I didnt want to be around people,I avoided my kids school functions for fear of embarrassing them and myself, I really became a hermit. After I had the lapband and had lost some weight I noticed the anxieties lessend. I think I had a confidence in myself that I never really had before. I felt good!! I went out and enjoyed life, took my first airplane trip to Vegas, attended so many events I would have never in the past. Now that I have gained the weight back I am back to that old person who I hated. I avoid events as much as I can and stick with my small circle of friends.I don't like to go out with the hubby for fear that we will run into his work friends and he will have to introduce me to them. One thing I make sure of is to avoid anyone I havent seen in awhile. I don't want them to see that I have gained the weight back. Last weekend I went to a BBQ and as my hubby and I were getting out of the car i heard my cousin say "is that cadezma" (obviously using my screen name here). Just the tone in his voice was like OMG she's huge again!!! I had that instant feeling of being punched in the stomach. I wanted to get back in the car and drive away, but of course I put my fake smile on and stuck it out. I absoulutely regret the lapband and want it out, more so I regret losing the weight with it. I look at it as a tease of what life can really be like. Maybe I should use it to motivate me to get to that point but if I could do it on my own I would have never had to get the lapband. I am not usually an emotional person but I am an emotional mess these days!!   As far as the dr appts go.... I demanded an Upper GI and endoscope. I had the upper GI last monday and the dr who did it said everything looked good.(he told my friend the same thing and when she seen the LB Dr that same afternoon, she was told she had a slip and dialation!!) I told my friend they probably got the charts mixed up and they were looking at mine, since her GI was just a check and she was having no symptoms. :P I don't see my dr until this week and havent heard nothing more from them, so I assume that things are good. I still want to have the endoscope done. I need to be sure there is no erosion etc. I am still having the nausea and things just don't feel right to me! Hopefully we can just get the process going on the sleeve!!!
cadezma77

cadezma77

5
rabrijumo's Blog
 

Trying To Consolidate My Blogs Adding Entries: Hearts Issues Original Date 8/23/12

Ok since 2004 I have had intermittent bouts with atrial fib. My heart is rapid irregular and weak.  It makes my head hurt and I can't exert myself at all. I used to go to the ER and they would try medication , it never worked, then they would admit me, monitor me and schedule a cardio version. I would always convert to normal sinus rhythm before the cardioversion. I got sick of going to the ER so I now live in a anticoagulated state on Coumadin and have short acting antiarrythmic medication that I take every four hours until I convert. There is a surgical option but my wt precludes the surgery.  In light of my scheduled wls I am thinking about this on two levels one that I will have an episode before during or after surgery and two that achieving wt loss will allow me to have  the surgery to put a stop to theses debilitating episodes.  Unfortunately in the past week I have had the first episode in over a year lasting over 24 hours and then another episode also lasting 24 hours. So my concern about it interfering with my wls is very real. Also I had to use 12 hours of paid time off on friday and I need every hour for my time off for surgery.   Then there is my MRSA which is meth resistant staph aureous. This infection used to be named a nosocomial or hospital acquired infection but they changed it to MRSA and now it seems to be treated like leprosy. You are labelled for life and isolated whenever you are in the hospital. Which means i get a private room which works for me but it irritates me that I am treated like a leper and the hospital the freaking source of the microorganism is absolved of all blame or responsibility.     I am wondering about how much time off i will need to take post op. I was hoping to get back to work in 2 weeks because I dont have alot of pto. I have to use one week of pto paid time off( they lump vacation and sick time together) then I can use short term disability , which is 2/3 of my pay. I was really hoping to get back to work in 2 weeks but I think now I should plan for more like 3-6 weeks. I first didn't think about std just thought I would use pto but I don't  even have enough. I live with my son and daughter in law so we share expenses and I will have help both physically and financially.  I am hoping 66% of my pay will be enough for a month or so. I can supplement with my pto but I just don't have much and as I am writing this I am home sick because my darn heart is acting up (atrial fib) I have had it since 2004 but has historically been infrequent til 9 days ago. I have now had 3 episodes. 2 lasted 24 hr each still in this one Been over 12 hours. I might need my meds changed which requires hospitalization and cardiac monitoring sighhhh . I had planned to visit my 19 y/o daughter this w/e and have reserved a room at a hotel. Now I might have to be in the hospital sheesh. Can I get a break here I am still in AFib feel like my head will explode and I am dizzy and weak. Can I cry now? When will this stop? I have a cardiology appointment tomorrow morning. Will be discussing changing my meds this weekend which will entail being hospitalized this situation has made my desire to have WLS even more imperative. I want to have the ablation procedure to cure the AFib. They will not perform it on a morbidly obese patient. So I must lose the weight first. I sure as hell hope my heart behaves for surgery!   
rabrijumo

rabrijumo

0
Tiffany's WLS journey
 

When Can I Start Working Out?

when can I start exercising? I'm 5 days post op.... Doctor appointment is Tuesday but I'm itching to start walking.... Since my prep started (one week from surgery 8-21-12) I've lost 22 1/2lbs!!!   My husband and I have taken a "stroll" here and there, just trying to get used to being up since I go back to work soon... But I've got an itch to jump on my elliptical and get to work! lol....   Thanks!
mrscastillo

mrscastillo

5
Velena's Blog
 

My Journey So Far

I've been following my pre-op diet for 3 weeks, tomorrow starts week 4. I don't think it is normally meant to go for this long but I was worried about not losing enough weight before the surgery so I started early. I've been using whey protein shakes and either Almond Milk or lactose free milk. I see the weight loss but it's hard to believe that it will be permanent. My family has been very supportive, my husband drinks a shake for breakfast now too and he's lost 8 lbs. I'm excited and nervous about the surgery on Sept 5th. Sometimes I tell myself that it's crazy and I'm over-reacting. I should be able to lose the weight by myself. But I've been fat for 95% of my adult life and I've tried to change without success. The final straw was having my diabetes (Adult onset for the past 18 yrs) get out of control last spring. That really scared me. I've got to do this and hope that my diabetes responds positively. Now it's just continue with the shakes and exercise and count down until Sept 5th!
Velena

Velena

2
The Slim Down Journey
 

Two Weeks & Two Days Out!

Well, I'm more than 2 weeks out now. Soreness is all gone, incisions are nearly healed, itching has subsided, and I'm eating regular food now. I was also happy to see that after I got off the mushy food stage and onto "real" food (protien and leafy greens), the weight began coming off better. It was seeming slow to me while I was on the mushy foods, probably because of the carbs and heavier soups, etc. things that Iwas consuming. Now, though, focusing on lean protiens and leafy green veggies has allowed me to jump start the weight loss.   I came to a strange realization after my post-op visit. I always knew the RNY was going to be a "tool" for me to be successful in losing weight. But I guess it didn't really sink in how I would use that tool until after it was over with and I had the green light to eat again. I realized then that it's still up to me to lose the weight through my behaviors and getting more exercise, but the RNY removes the things that prevented me from being successful before (HUNGER! and a feeling of deprivation). I suppose I knew it intellectually beforehand, but the reality set in only afterward.   I tried the Bariatric Advantage multi-vitamins and calcium. The vitamins are fine; however, I couldn't stomach the nasty mint-flavored Calcium Citrate chewables. I found that I'd much rather take 2 caplets twice a day and found a great alternative right in my local GNC store. Each of us is different and we just have to find what works.   I'm starting to notice a difference in my clothing! Things are getting looser and I even had to take a link out of my watchband. It's the little things, right?!   Starting: 317# Pre-Op: 296# Today: 283.5# Total Down: 33.5#
MsCook

MsCook

1

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