Body image issues

[heatherdawn 43]

I know I have a LNG way to go but I am down to 220 from 343 now wearing a large/x-large from a snug 3x. I keep hearing that I look great but to get honest I don't see it. When I look in the mirror all I see is loose skin and saggy girls. To be honest it makes me disgusted and I am having difficulty adjusting to the new me. Has anyone else felt this way if so how did you deal with it?

[JCP 619]

Wow... You are an inspiration. I have lost only about 40 lbs and I don't like what I see. But I feel SO much better! Please be proud of yourself. Don't worry about saggy boobs - we all have them! I plan on wearing a bra and three-quarter sleeves all the time! (Think I can find a swimsuit with sleeves?) Plus doing neck exercises and moisturizing. As for the rest of it, who cares? Clothes will cover us. And we will be healthy! I am proud of you. God bless you!

[Cococat 119]

All of us here have issues about extra skin. We will probably not look the way we did when we were kids. So? At least we will be alive. I try to focus on my health. I had a friend who although only a bit heavy, actually wore a jumpsuit into the pool! She was so paranoid about her body! She wore a French corset to bed with her boyfriend (14 years younger! They eventually married.) and covered as much as she could. Funny. She kept telling me that after 30, a woman needs props and went for lace everything in the way of undies. She was a terrible tease and guys just loved her. So, relax about the skin.

[skinnygirlwithin 693]

my saggy girls are now armpit warmers... they are no longer for sexual desire.. just another way to keep warm LOL

We all have this adjustment - even now, at goal weight - I still have issues.. some days are better then others. it will get better. good luck! your doing great!!

[AvaFern 3,516]

I can appreciate how you feel. I'm 8 pounds from goal and I've had most of my plastics done and I still look in the mirror and am not terribly happy with what I see. I am almost at a weight where I feel like I look decent (at least in clothing!) but the only thing that really got me to that point is getting close to goal. Everyone told me I looked great when I was heavier too, although I suppose that was in comparison to my starting weight, lol, which well, short of gaining weight, almost anything would have looked better! I look in the mirror and I see flabby arms with batwings that I can't decide if I should fix or not (is the scar or the flab worse?)...I see a fat butt that no matter how much I lose isn't going to get any better unless I have the back part of the body lift (I did the Tummy Tuck, and breast lift and augment) and I see all the scars from my other surgeries and just remind myself that it is totally cool to only ever be naked in the dark! I don't like what I look like...but it certainly gets me to the gym everyday in the hopes that I've come this far, I can still keep improving.

Much as I think the advice to just love yourself is not incorrect, the best advice I have is to keep on keepin on. You may not think you look great now, but use that as motivation to keep working. I had a wedding to go to back in March and I was around 170-ish at that point, which is not hot, and when I saw my pictures of what I looked like then, I used that disgust to really get over the plateau that I had hit. It might sound a little harsh, but if you use how much you dislike what you look like to motivate yourself to look better....that has always worked far better for me than convincing myself I looked great when in actuality I was kind of a chunk. Sadness doesn't have to be bad....it makes the happiness at the end all that much better.

Edited October 22, 2014 by AvaFern

[livvsmum 2,368]

Yep, definitely. I've struggled with eating disorders all my life and right now am battling body dysmorphic disorder. What I see in the mirror and what other people see are definitely not the same thing. Therapy helps, but it is a constant struggle. I keep thinking if I lose 5 more pounds I will "look" thin, or if I get rid of the excess skin I will "feel" thin, but I know it is a much deeper issue than 5 pounds or some saggy skin that no one else sees. You are definitely not alone!