Ok Gang - Here's our new thread (I think) - I haven't started an new thread in ages..

I will post a link to this thread for all our original Lucky #7 who pop in every now and then so they can find us..

Edited August 7, 200917 yr by IndioGirl55

Janet I am so sorry to hear about your aunt and how alone you are feeling. Hugs GF!!

I am very emotional in about everyway possible. TOM is due this week so that explains some of it. I have been watching a lot of the video's on utube about gastric by pass and the band. I tell you some of those about the band really PISS me off!!! How dare they say the band DOES NOT work. If it doesn't work for them then the correctt wording would be 'the band did not work for me' and they need to be honest and say WHY. The band is a lot more restrictive in what we need to do to lose the weight and etc. Sorry jjust so mad about a few of those.

Court is so close now. She is down 13 lbs in 9 days due to having nothing but liquids. I am down 4. (yes I have had 2 smart ones in the last couple of days) I was having TERRIBLE reflux from all the fluids and Court said 'you really need to eat mom. I am ok' Bless you little loving heart I am so proud of that girl!!! We went to my sisters today for a birthday party. Told Court it would be understandable if she didn't go (cake and ice cream) and she said 'no I need to deal with it. I can't run from food.' We went and she was really struggling with the hunger, of course my sister did not help at all (jealous of court getting surgery) and took every opportunity to remind Court she couldn't have cake. I got angry with my sister and while they ate cake and ice cream I asked Court to go to the grocery store with me to get more bottled water and crystal lite. We took our time at the store looking at Healthy eating choices for when she can eat. I know sounds like I was torturing her too but she really was fine once we left my sisters. They are usually really close but my sister unfortunately has gained quite a bit of weight this past year and really wants something done but has no insurance due to being laid off from her job and so blah blah blah. Sorry didn't mean to drag on. Oh yeah one more thing. While we were waiting for others to get there we were the only ones there so I got on her treadmill and started jogging at 4.6 and she told me not to run on the treadmill because it might wreck her floor. So I kicked it down and walked for 45 minutes.

So we are on the down hill slide. Getting very excited and very nervous for my baby. She told me for Christmas she wants CLOTHES!!! My little girl has not asked for clothes unless she ABSOLUTELY HAD TO HAVE THEM in years. I am so excited to go shopping with her.

I have also found my remotivation again to get my butt moiving and drop my last few pounds. Summer is over and I have been putting off joining the gym and soon will be to cold rainy to be walking outside so guess what........I am rejoining this week and my 'surgery gift' to Court is paying for her membership for the next year as well!!!

Well sorry such a long dribbling post. Feeling very happy excited and down all at the same time tonight. (Is that possible?!) Feelin like I need a good cry!

Hello Everyone, I had a lot of reading to do. My lap top is broken, so it slows down my computer usage.

Janet- So sorry to hear about your aunt. I know exactly how you are feeling about losing your past. I feel it everyday. It is very hard to have my Mom in a home. She is the youngest, and none of them will be here much longer. And since my Daddy left, I feel like I lost my family. Hugs!

My heart hurts tonight. Can't sleep and pretty weepy. Thinking of the last 6 years and how much the kids have grown and their dad is not here with them. I know he is watching over them but I just miss him. :seeya:

Need to quit watching music videos on Utube!

TTYAL. Nite

Good morning ladies. Feeling MUCH better today. Sorry such a bummer last night. Just one of those nights I guess

Ok so has anyone tried those Healthy Choice Steamers? I am absolutely in love with them!!! They are so good. Yes I am eating at least one time a day now. To much reflux. The chili with no beans and burger is awsome but HEARTBURN!! Forgot what that was like!

Ok Ladies most of you know me and my OCD about cleaning. I am going to TRY not to do my deep cleaning today. I am trying to put it off closer to Wednesday so I clean right before we leave for the hospital on Thursday but I am not sure I can handle that. I am such a routine person with that that it is driving my nuts already today so I am going to try to find something to fill my day.

I will cbl

Have a great day everyone and again thanks for being here last night. The old ugly feed me til it quits hurting reared its head last night but I did fine. I drank LOTS of water to make me full to over come it. I am an emotional eater and always will be unfortunately.

Jackie, I'm so sorry. There is nothing I could say to make it hurt less, but here is my shoulder, cry at will. I'm postive that he is proud of you and the kids. You've carried on and loved your kids for both of you. He has not truely missed your lives, just watching from a different place. And he is still actively involved with their lives. You may not see him, but you feel him. I'm in awe of people who have a love like that. Many of us have never had that opportunity. So try to take joy from the time you had.

Jackie, I'm so sorry. There is nothing I could say to make it hurt less, but here is my shoulder, cry at will. I'm postive that he is proud of you and the kids. You've carried on and loved your kids for both of you. He has not truely missed your lives, just watching from a different place. And he is still actively involved with their lives. You may not see him, but you feel him. I'm in awe of people who have a love like that. Many of us have never had that opportunity. So try to take joy from the time you had.

Thank you so much!! Some nights are just like that for me. I may be remarried but it is not a 'fullfilling' marriage and really lonely. He is not a social person to others NOR us living in the house so when the kids are gone for the night and I am feeling that way it is really hard. You are right I was very fortunate.

Thank you again!

Jackie, I guess I'm still looking for that type of love. I talk big about 'I'm good just by myself', but the reality is that I'm still looking for someone who loves me for myself. I almost had it twice, 1st time I couldn't compete with his family, 2nd time couldn't compete with the drugs. Silly I know to still want that.

Good Morning Gang

I am feeling better this morning -

Yesterday when I went to p/u gf for massage - and telling her my woes of lossing my Aunt - she gave me a glass of wine - it was 9:30 a.m. (but noon somewhere) ended up 2 glasses had a buzz then went for my massage - it was good - I enjoyed it but could have used another 1/2 and next time asking for a guy - gf got an extra 10 minutes and he really got the knots out of her shoulders (I carry my stress there too).. I am now hooked on them - want to go for another one...

I didn't go out last night - didn't feel like it - got a candy bar to drowned my sorrows - but it didn't taste good - didn't even finish it (it was a big one did eat 3/4 before I decided it wasn't going to taste good) but did have 3 cheese tacos (those tasted good) - I wanted white gravy and rice - but didn't have the fixings so had a lean cusiene alfreado instead...

Slept good with the help of a sleeping pill - now need to shower and get out of the house - need to look for airfairs too - well all in time...

Jackie - Hugs - I don't know if I would be married to a person just for the sake of being married - it doesn't sound like much of a marraige to me - and I can only imagine how terrible the loss of you 1st DH affects you and the kids - espcially dieing at such a young age..

Karla - love the part on couldn't compete w/the drugs - I get you on that one - but that wasn't your fault - that's drugs - no one's love can compete with drugs - drugs is their love even as it's killing them - they just can't help themsleves - no matter how much we love a person - we can't fix them..

Well - I need to get busy... Doing what I don't know - I can wash - clean (I am far from being ocd like our jackie :0) and I need to continue to look into airfares -

So off i go to get something done..

Good Morning!

Nice sunny day here, but bracing for the coming week, which doesn't look good weather-wise! I may NOT be riding my scooter over to PT tomorrow! Looks like cold and rainy ALL week, even through next weekend. Hmmmmm, we'll be stepping up the packing of the RV!! :seeya::biggrin::blushing: That's the kind of weather we want to escape from. Plans for leaving are shaping up. Will leave here Oct. 8th if all goes well, and leave the area on Oct. 10th. That gives us two nights in the "south end" to go to Grandparents' Day at little GS pre-school and some time to say goodbye to DD & family. The three little ones really miss us when we're gone.

We had a very nice visit with them yesterday and I tolerated the 1+ hr drive each way quite well. We went out for lunch to their favorite "peanuts on the floor" place and when we got back we walked the kids to the park. Well.... they wanted me to walk, but I explained that it was a little too far for Graminator to walk yet.. and too much up and down hills. So I rode the scooter. Thomas likes that anyway... he ran alongside and we pretended we were running away from monsters and dragons!!

Had crab cakes at the steak house... two and a baked potato. But I only ate one and half the potato. Finished it off in the evening at dinner time. No soup or salad, some steamed veggies and I ate 1/2 a roll and a couple of peanuts.

Hope you all have a great day. Have to go get ready for church. Then maybe lunch with other DD & SIL before coming home to watch the Seahawks game. Didn't walk yesterday, so have to fit that in today at least once. Did do DD's steps several times yesterday. First time for that many steps. Not reciprocating yet though.... up with the good, down with the one that is still in recovery mode. That's okay for now. I did it once to show DD that I could, but need to build strength in that leg. Need to get ankle weights for exercises.

Janet so glad you got to relax. Bout time. I like massages to. I carry my stress in my shoulders and neck so it is heaven'y when I go. Always have to do the full hour though.

Ok so I am cleaning today AND Wednesday night. I can't take it. Just got off the phone with GF and she said she needed to go to hang bedding on the line and finish her cleaning. I can't help it. The impulse is strong. At least it is not a destructive impulse huh? I get this 'anxiety feeling when it is cleaning day. Need to get it done need to get it done kinda thing. LOL At least it keeps me away from the food!

So I am off to clean clean clean! Beautiful sunny fall day with tempts in the higher 60's. Light breeze with fresh air flowing threw the house. Lovin it!

Jackie, any time you run out of things to clean, you can come to my house. I use to be that way. Sometimes, I wish I still was, now I just don't give a hoot. Yeah right, I give a hoot, but don't have what it takes to get it done.

Jackie, I guess I'm still looking for that type of love. I talk big about 'I'm good just by myself', but the reality is that I'm still looking for someone who loves me for myself. I almost had it twice, 1st time I couldn't compete with his family, 2nd time couldn't compete with the drugs. Silly I know to still want that.

No it is not silly to want to be loved. You deserve and and you never know........it could happen when you least expect it. I am sorry to hear about the families and the drugs. My 1st DH was such a wonderful dad to the kids. We worked opposite shifts all the time so that one of us was home with the kids. He was fine cooking meals doing baths homework and all the things that are many times left to the women. He truly was a HANDS-ON dad and he loved every minute. The kids many times will bring up things they did with their dad while I was at work and I treasure their memories because that is something they got to share with him that they now share with me.

Janet your right we don't really have a marriage. We are more like room mates. We have no common interests now. He is almost 12 years older than me and I should have considered that I guess. He is just such a quiet person who sticks to himself and the riverbanks or hunting during those seasons. There is nothing wrong with that but ya know I want conversation once in a while. I can ask him something and he answers but we don't just converse ya know? I know he loves me but I find myself constantly thinking about when the kids move out on their own with their own lives. I am lonely and I have the kids and him living here. The kids keep me on an even keel. What happens when they are gone? I already know that answer.........I will be so lonely. I have told him on MANY occasions that when the kids leave if he does not act like a husband or an adult he can move his ass down the hill back in with mommy and daddy and I am going on with my life. I will be 38 years old. Like hell is I will settle for the rest of my life. I have had a hell of alot more in my life before and gave that up so I sure as hell won't 'settle' for less.

WOW IT FELT GREAT TO GET THAT OFF MY CHEST. lol:tt2:

oK THE BROOM IS YELLING AND THE VACUUM CLEANER IS GETTING ANNOYED WITH ME (LOL) BETTER GET!:seeya:

Good Morning!

Nice sunny day here, but bracing for the coming week, which doesn't look good weather-wise! I may NOT be riding my scooter over to PT tomorrow! Looks like cold and rainy ALL week, even through next weekend. Hmmmmm, we'll be stepping up the packing of the RV!! :seeya::biggrin::blushing: That's the kind of weather we want to escape from. Plans for leaving are shaping up. Will leave here Oct. 8th if all goes well, and leave the area on Oct. 10th. That gives us two nights in the "south end" to go to Grandparents' Day at little GS pre-school and some time to say goodbye to DD & family. The three little ones really miss us when we're gone.

We had a very nice visit with them yesterday and I tolerated the 1+ hr drive each way quite well. We went out for lunch to their favorite "peanuts on the floor" place and when we got back we walked the kids to the park. Well.... they wanted me to walk, but I explained that it was a little too far for Graminator to walk yet.. and too much up and down hills. So I rode the scooter. Thomas likes that anyway... he ran alongside and we pretended we were running away from monsters and dragons!!

Had crab cakes at the steak house... two and a baked potato. But I only ate one and half the potato. Finished it off in the evening at dinner time. No soup or salad, some steamed veggies and I ate 1/2 a roll and a couple of peanuts.

Hope you all have a great day. Have to go get ready for church. Then maybe lunch with other DD & SIL before coming home to watch the Seahawks game. Didn't walk yesterday, so have to fit that in today at least once. Did do DD's steps several times yesterday. First time for that many steps. Not reciprocating yet though.... up with the good, down with the one that is still in recovery mode. That's okay for now. I did it once to show DD that I could, but need to build strength in that leg. Need to get ankle weights for exercises.

Phyl can't wait to see you walking !!!! Glad you had a good time with family !!!

Janet so glad you got to relax. Bout time. I like massages to. I carry my stress in my shoulders and neck so it is heaven'y when I go. Always have to do the full hour though.

Ok so I am cleaning today AND Wednesday night. I can't take it. Just got off the phone with GF and she said she needed to go to hang bedding on the line and finish her cleaning. I can't help it. The impulse is strong. At least it is not a destructive impulse huh? I get this 'anxiety feeling when it is cleaning day. Need to get it done need to get it done kinda thing. LOL At least it keeps me away from the food!

So I am off to clean clean clean! Beautiful sunny fall day with tempts in the higher 60's. Light breeze with fresh air flowing threw the house. Lovin it!

Jackie the massage was 50 mintues - and I hear you on the neck and shoulders - mine are still tight - I may go to massage envey today - we will see - I am washing right now and going thru my hidden jewelry - stuff I have from my Mom's mom - stuff I got from my stepmom (wore her pearls to the week the other weekend) stuff I got from x's - need to get it hidden again ;0)..

Yes dear if you have to have a complusion - cleaning would be the one I would choose :0) it's not bad..

Jackie, any time you run out of things to clean, you can come to my house. I use to be that way. Sometimes, I wish I still was, now I just don't give a hoot. Yeah right, I give a hoot, but don't have what it takes to get it done.

Thats cuz you are a perfectionist and don't have the time to do it the right way - so you just don't do it at all ;0)

I hear you on that one - well back to my stuff cbl

Thanks Jackie

Oh by the way, I'm heading to go clean out the washing machine. So I haven't totally lost my OCD with cleaning. I use to clean the kitchen floor with a toothbrush. Now I'm lucky if it gets swabbed out when it reaches out and grabs you.

holy crap, I need to go backto page 43 to catch up...

Just got home from CAMPING in Tobermory with DH... it was divine...

CBL babes