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BIG Embarassing Moments - Fuel for Success



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Being at a corporate retreat with all of our Senior management team. I was also up for a big promotion at the time. My mentor worked on the other side of the country so we had actually never met. He was the decision maker for the position and had encouraged me to "throw my hat in the ring". We were all going kayaking the next day and I was supposed to be with him. of course, I couldn't fit...and of course the other candidate for the job was there and offered to jump in. I stood on the shore alone and watched as 45 members of senior management floated away.........

I can't wait for my band

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I pulled into a parking space reserved for expectant mothers and hung my handicapped placcard on the mirror. when i came back, there was a note on my car that read "You aren't expecting You're just fat"

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Ah I can feel everyone's pain and relate! I have had so many embarrassing moments in my life. I am 24 and weigh 330lbs. All my friends love to do the normal things people my age like to but I hold myself back from many because of my weight. Here are just some of the things I can think of that really hurt me...

*At least 3 different times at 3 different amusement parks, trying to get on a ride and not fitting, so then I had to get off with everyone looking at me, not to mention I was always with a guy that I was dating at the time

*I had a BIG meeting at work, at least 100 people in the room and my chair breaks, everyone burst out laughing and I had to get up and go to the back of the room to get a new chair, they handed me an extra sturdy chair, as implying it was my weight that had broke it :thumbup:

*Once on vacation at the beach, I was sitting at a restaurant on a pier and all of a sudden a plastic chair broke, which landed me on the ground and almost in the water!

*I was at a fair one time, there was the ignorant ass clow trying to get people to play a game... he said, "Hey you fat girl, come knock me off my block. You're big enough!" I was mortified, it was on a mic and everyone around heard. I could just see people stare at me!

*There are so many times I can remember being in public and hearing people make rude comments about my weight. Ignorant people saying to their friends about hooking them up with me, just to be rude and make a joke. Ahhh such freaking ignorant people!

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acasner,

Hang in there! It will get better, and think of the empathy you have for others because of these other rude people! I bet you never laugh or make fun of someone who is "different", for whatever reason. Know that THAT is noticed by those people and their loved ones, and instead of making them feel bad, YOU may have put a little light in their day!

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I am just at the beginning of the lap band journey. I have been to a seminar, done some research, and am meeting with a surgeon next week. However, I had my a-ha moment last month.

I am only 30 but have a strong family history of pre-menopausal breast cancer so my ob/gyn ordered a mammogram. I had the mammogram and a ‘suspicious mass’ was found in my left breast. I had a spot compression mammogram and an ultrasound and the doctors felt the mass was not cancerous but said I could get a breast MRI just to be certain, for my own peace of mind. When I was scheduling my MRI they asked how tall I was (5’6”) and how much I weighed (about 310.) The scheduler got very quiet. She then said she’d have to check with the MRI techs and get back in touch with me. They determined I should come in and do a dry-run with the machine. I go in to do that, lay on the very uncomfortable table and she starts the machine. I didn’t fit. I got stuck at the butt. I was mortified and so sad. The breast MRI IS a little different from the regular, they put you up on a board that raises you up a few inches, but still… I wouldn’t fit.

So, that was my moment when I KNEW I had to do something.

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wow when i read these my heart goes out to all of you including me. i know we have all had these moments and they were very embarrassing......so here's a few of mine.

*at a family gathering my dad told everyone i would be fine as long as i had a plate of food in front of me- he said it like 3x to make sure everybody heard him. i had to finally tell him to shutup.

*at my DH aunts house she told me not to sit in a chair at her dining room table-she tried to play it off and say the chair was loose-yeah right

*in high school a boy told me if i lost 40-50 lbs i would be super fine, he considered himself a friend so i wasnt mad at him

*once i got duct tape and went around my thighs to see if i could make my legs smaller-ouch, i will never do that again

when i look at myself i want to see a healthier me and do things normal weighted people can do.

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Mandilou- I just read your post and burst out into tears- not necessarily bad tears, just tears...I can relate on about 18 of the 20 things you said...I just got my authorization for surgery and am scheduled to have it April 26th...it cant come soon enough.

One of my moments: My co workers always bring in their clothes for a clothing exchange...they are maybe a size 12 on a "fat" day...everyone gathers around the clothes and rummages through them...they get the cute Express jeans, business suits, and dresses and I get the scarves, purses and jewelry...it is so embarassing to see everyone going through these small clothes and I get a purse here and there. One time, a coworker brought in a "special skirt just for me"...she gave it to me and said that she was cleaning out her closet and found this skirt from when she was..get this..."fat and lazy, before she started working out"!!! She said she thought of me when she found it! What a skinny biotch!:frown: I wanted to punch her in her prominent little cheek bones! I took it, looked at it and it was a size 14...the last time I wore a size 14 was probably when I was 14!! I was wearing about a size 22 at the time. At least she thought I looked thinner than I was, I guess...silver lining? Anyway, that was a very sad moment for me. I cant wait to one day, be smaller than her size 14 skirt and give that skirt back to her and tell her it doesn't fit- it's too big...that will be the best day ever! lol:wink2:

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Reading all of these posts has brought tears to my eyes. I will keep this thread ear marked to keep me motivated when I start my pre-op diet and get banded. Thank you everyone!

One of my most embarrassing moments is when I took my daughter to Six Flags. One of her favorite rides is the Pirate...nice easy going ride. I finally get up to the front, and the man operating the ride made me wait with my daughter until most of the ride was full so the weight it distributed equally on the ride. I wanted to run away! :frown:

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I just had a guy call me a Fat F__ck. In a road rage incedent.... his road rage not mine... and I know I should have ignored it but I would be lying if I said it didn't bother me. It did and probably more than it should have.

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I had a few embarassing moments:

1. last year I was at Universal Studios with my fiance and a few friends, and I could not fit on a roller coaster ride. The bar just would not go down and there was no click sound. A worker tried really hard to make the seat "Click" but it wouldnt and I had to get off the ride after I waited for over an hour in line. Everyone waiting to get on the ride saw what was going on and I was mortified!

2. I was at a Water park in Orlando about 5 yrs ago and instead of sliding down like a lightning bolt on the Water slide as my friends were able to do so, I on the otherhand, got stuck and had to scoot down the rest of the way which took forever for me to finally get to the bottom and I held up the line.

3. When I was in high school, we had these smalls desks that was connected to the seat as well and the opening wasnt all that big, so in almost every class I would sit in the back because whenever it was time to leave or get up I would have to fight with the desk in order to get out of it. I hated high school and those darn seats!

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These stories are heartbreaking. :thumbup:

Some of my worst experiences....

Causing an old aluminum chair to bend so badly I had to get up before it broke.

I'm currently taking grad classes and one class meets in a seminar room. There's about 15 of us and everyone sits around one big table, except me because my thighs are too big for the chairs that fit at the table. That leaves me with two options, I either sit by myself in one of the desks that are in the corner where I can lift the table portion of the desk up so I fit, or I can borrow an armless chair from the "special needs" department.

Being in my 20s, my friends spend most weekends in bars. Every time I get roped into going I regret it because I quickly become the fat friend left alone at the bar when everyone else goes off flirting or dancing with guys. I've never had a guy really interested in me and as shallow as it is, that's what probably bothers me the most.

And of course there was the time I was 18 and going to a club for the first time with two friends. I wasn't too excited because I felt self-conscious but I got all dressed up. As we were crossing the street in front of the club, a car passed with some guys in it and the driver shouted "who dressed up a whale and brought it out?!" I pretended I didn't hear but he was only a couple feet away and my friends knew I had. I was quiet and sad all night after that, totally ruined my night.

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I'm sorry so many have had to deal with situations like this. My heart breaks for everyone who shared their story. I too have had some significantly embarrasing moments including;

1. Working as a waitress, I was training a new person, we both went up to a table of a father and son, as soon as I got to the table the kid yells out, dad she is huge! I was mortified especially since the person I was training laughed!

2. Another customer had come in and I was taking her order, as I walked away I heard her say what a waste, I turned and asked her what she said, and she replied with what a waste of a pretty face on such a fat girl. She then proceeded to ask me if I could liposuction, and how I never will find a man who can stand to look at such a fat girl. I then pointed to my bf who had happened to be there at the same time, and told her we have been together for 4 years. She then leaned over and whispered is he legally blind or something.... It took everything in me to walk that off

I have also experienced the breaking of chairs, or not being able to fit into them, etc. All of these things will make us tougher and better able to handle anything. I wish everyone luck on their journeys!

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My heart is breaking for everyone because I have been there. Oh wow...how I've been there. Let's see.... here are a few:

One time I was fishing at my SIL's house. She's the type that was always thin, so she never had a weight problem and would make comments to me. Well, I'm sitting on a wooden bench on her pier and it's a family reunion so EVERYONE is there. All of the sudden, I hear cracking and you guessed it. It broke. Right there. In front of EVERYONE. I sort of wanted to drown myself in the pond.

At another family gathering, my husband's dad was watching our cousin swinging. She is a bigger girl, so he hollers over to me (in front of about 10 other family members) "Hey Ginger - why don't you go get on the other swing so we can see the thing break". I wanted to deck him in the face. :thumbup: A**HAT!

I've had to bypass sitting in the folding camping chairs because I know that they only went up to 225 lbs. I didn't want to risk it.

I used to be a product designer in the scrapbook market. If you know anything about it, it's a very vicious, female-driven industry. Well, there was a blog that was called "Smack" and I was the target for the fat jokes for a long time. One of my "friends" said "hey - they're talking about you on there" and they were. Talking about how fat I was, how my husband must go to strip clubs to get turned on to come home to me, etc. I was so distraught that I quit my job and walked away from it. I couldn't handle it. I mean, the comments were downright MEAN and they were anonymous so I had no idea who wrote what. I had done a few TV shows, taught all over the country, etc., so I knew these people had met me. To think that was what they took away from meeting me was devastating. :cursing:

I could go on and on...

Isn't it sad how all of us have these stories?

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I have hyperhydrosis (excessive sweating). AND I'm super fat. So the worst, most embarrassing thing to me would be the sweating - butt sweat, back sweat, face sweat...always picking fabrics without any regard to the season but instead how well they will camouflage sweat. :)

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all of these posts make me nauseous. i guess its a good thing.... but i feel sick to my stomach because i thought i was the only one....

1. when i was about 7 or 8, i was with my grandparents who were attempting to sell their rental house. My grandmother told me, "I know a little girl who lost a lot of weight who is your age just by sucking in her stomach'. how stupid. i didnt understand it then, but by the time i was 12, i never wanted to see or talk to them again. and as of now, i havent spoken to them in over 4 years. everytime i saw them i hear, 'its just too bad...' or 'cant you just go on a diet', or 'i know you want second helpings, heres another plate. take some home with you, even.'

2. when i was a sophomore in high school i went to a military dance with my then-boyfriend wearing a black and white long floor length gown. I felt so beautiful. when i got home and showed my mom the professional pictures, she said i looked like a whale in that dress because of the black on the sides and the white down the middle.

3. for my 29th birthday my mom bought me a nightgown. it was more of a muumuu and when i held it up from the box it was in, my entire family laughed at me. i thank the higher powers above for my best friend who was with me at the time. she scolded my mom and said, 'would YOU ever wear something like this?' my mom said no, but she didnt know what else i could fit into. which is why i always ask for giftcards for holidays. my family just doesnt get it.

4. i am a nurse and i have to talk with my patients about their weight. it makes me sick to think about it.

5. i went to a festival a few years ago after being on yet another diet. i had lost about 15 pounds! i wore a sleeveless dress and was walking to my car when i was passed by some teens who loudly yelled and whooped and pointed at me. i dont know why they were doing that, i just figure it was because im fat. i got into my car as quickly as i could so they couldnt see me cry.

6. after work one day, i got home and realized the back of my pants had split. im not sure anyone noticed, but how could they not? and how could they never tell me? :-(

7. i have to squeeze into spandex shorts underneath my scrubs because otherwise my legs rub together and its just miserable. because of this extra layer of clothes, i sweat more than normal so i have to keep deoderant in my locker at work.

8. i cant workout in normal gyms. i just cant do it. its taken me over a year to even get myself to go to an information meeting becuase im so embarressed about my weight. it is all unfortunate self-perception. probably due to numbers 1 & 2 above.

9. my mom and dad got into a fight while i was in high school, yelling at each other, my mom was crying, my dad was angry, cursing.... only to find out that they were arguing about how i had gotten fat and blaming each other.

10. when i was in third grade, i was burned by cigerettes on my right forearm by the boys at my bus stop for being 'the fat girl who deserved it'. after that, i always tried really hard to miss the bus so my mom would have to drive me to school.

11. my dad was a marathon runner who decided it would be a great idea to enter me into a 5k when i was in 8th grade. i had never run before and i wasnt in shape at all and had never trained for anything! i was the last to finish the race, and im talking by at least a good half hour to an hour, and the race people had to drive behind me in a golf cart. i felt like i was the loan cow being herded to the finish line. it was mortifying.

whats interesting to me, is that most of these stories are from my younger years. i am now 30. when i look at pictures of myself from when i was younger, i think i look somewhat 'normal'. over the years, my self-image has morphed into a distorted picture of a girl who is 5'8 ( i used to be 5'10 but ive lost some inches due to my weight) who feels like i am about 600 pounds. i am very hard on myself and im so angry at my family and all of the atrocities that ive dealt with because of my weight. and now that im quite a bit bigger than the 'average' person (what the heck is average anyways?!?!), i too, have had my share of chairs breaking, the dreaded airplane hell, the amusement parks that i just dont go to anymore, the rude comment from the drunk guy at the bar, the seats in the basketball arena that i can barely squeeze myself into and theres no way im standing up to cheer and clap like everybody else....

so tomorrow is my first informational appointment.

ive read every single story on this thread and i am so sorry for the terrible times that we've each experienced.

heres to having more stories in the future that are positive ones. i really hope i get some good news about getting the okay for LAP-BAND® tomorrow. it wont be for at least another year, but at least itll be something i can look forward to.

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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