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Ideas on how to keep my surgery private from coworkers?

I know many of you out there feel OK about telling coworkers about your WLS. I do not. I feel that I will be judged and I also feel that this is a very personal decision. I plan to get my surgery during vacation time: Christmas, if I can swing it by then. I get 2 weeks off and could feasibly get back to work with no one knowing, except that some of my job requires being on my feet for extended periods of time and some heavy lifting. I know people will ask when they see the weight oming off, and I plan to say that I am on a serious diet. What have some of you done to hide your surgery? COuld I say I had gall bladder surgery???:crying:

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I'm one that would tell anyone. I'm just not that private, but I can certainly respect your decision not to tell. I know that you will be under extra scrutiny if you do tell. With that being said, I would not tell anyone you had gallbladder surgery. First of all, I wouldn't say that because it's a lie. Also, with dramatic weightloss, there is a stronger chance that you WILL have to have gallbladder surgery later. What would you say then? (Awkward!)

If people start to ask about your weight loss, just tell them you are working really hard. You will be!

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Thanks Amy, you have a good point, but how do I make sure that I'm not made to stand for extended periods of time or lift heavy items if I don't say I've had some kind of surgery? If I say I had surgery over the break, but it's personal and don't want to talk about it, people will start all sorts of rumors, that's what my work place is like. I would love to say nothing, but I don't want to over exert myself just two weeks post op and cause a problem either.:crying:

I have already told my boss that I'm going to have my hiatal hernia fixed. For me, though, it is a true statement because I have a hernia that is huge and is just about wrapping around my esophagus (ewww). I just will happen to be having the lapband placed at the same time. I don't know if you have a hernia or some other explanation for minor surgery (compared to gastric bypass, for example), but I sure wouldn't lie. I'm just not going to tell the whole story unless someone asks me directly. At that point, for me it would be lying if someone asked me directly if I had lapband and I said I hadn't. But since your surgery probably will interfere with your job to a degree, you could probably tell your boss and ask to keep it confidential. Isn't it a breach of some kind for an employer to share something that you want confidential, especially the nature of surgery? I don't know, just a possibility....

Your doc probably won't clear you to lift anything over 5 lbs for about 6 weeks. There are internal stitches that have to heal, as well as the incisional area. If you don't want to tell, then don't. If saying you had gallbladder surgery gets you out of lifting for 6 weeks, then I'd say it. However, you should realize that your eating habits will probably be dramatically different (after surgery, most of us had to do liquids for a time, then mushies, then soft foods before we were able to eat real food), so if you tell a white lie about the surgery, you may have to come up with another one to cover your new diet.

You could tell them that you had an injury during vacation and it will take a while to heal. Surgery is an injury to your body and it would explain the weight restrictions and not standing too long.

DianaT

Ok well here is my opinion.....I did try to hide it. I'm a stay at home mom of two little girls so I dont see many people...but when I do see them they always tell me how good I'm looking and what am I doing? So finally I was like I have to tell people....I feel so good about myself and the way I am starting to look that I should tell people the truth! I have only lost 25 pounds since July but I am breathing better and I am happy to tell people about this. I want people who are overweight to know that there is options out there :) Ok that was my opinion :) Have a good day!:tongue2:

I agree you will not be able to lift anything over 15 pounds for a while....and heavy stuff takes 6 weeks or more (your surgeon can advise you.) You may need to tell your HR department whether you tell your coworkers or not. Lifting before you're ready can do damage. I think you'll need to do some research before you proceed.

Legally, you don't have to give up your medical information to your boss. Just say that you have health issues that you had to resolve and you are still under Dr care.

I think though that her employer can require some sort of proof...letter from the doctor or whatever. Otherwise unscrupulous people could say "I'm not well" and get light duty...?

Yes. Exactly. I guess I was thinking about so much but typed so little. Have your Dr. orders ready. Perhaps I was thinking that once you cleared it through Human resources, you would not have to reveal certain things to your supervisors or management? Also, whatever you reveal to your employer, he/she must keep it confidential unless you give permission.

Hi, I've had the same desires to keep this news to myself, at least for now. I told one friend that I was just thinking about the lap band and she begged me not to do it. After that I decided that I just didn't want to expend the energy to explain and defend myself. I have only told 2 well-chosen friends so far and they have been very supportive,and naturally my husband who is totally supportive.

I also asked this question at a support group meeting and got a variety of responses. Some wanted everyone to know because they didn't want people to think that anyone could lose these large amounts of weight without a powerful tool like this. Some were sorry that they told friends. One woman said that her best friend hasn't spoken to her since her surgery. Some people may think that it is "cheating" or laziness. Maybe a little part of me thinks I may fail too. :tongue2: So I'm waiting for success first. I may change my mind eventually. For now I'm happy with my secret.

Barbara

P.S. Don't feel that you have to over explain.:)

I was banded one year ago. No one at work knows.

I said I had emergency hiatal hernia surgery.

That was I didnt tell anyone before the surgery, it turned out to be true because the band doc found and repaired a hiatal hernia. Apparenty they occur in about 50% of the obese.

The cool thing is that at lunch, when I was on liquids then mushies I explained that it was due to hernia surgery. A guy at work had hiatal hernia surgery years before, and he said, oh yeah and some foods are really hard to get down, even months after the surgery (lol).

I came back from surgery with a note that said I had surgery (in order to use sick days)

I would avoid the gall bladder thing, I am not sure that the scar is in the same place, and what would happen if you really did have gall bladder issues, or if someone from work said I am having gall bladder issues too, can I have some advice?

In terms of the weight loss, people see that I dont eat much, and what I do eat is healthy, that I exercise, and drink lots of Water, and never partake in birthday cake etc.................no one is surprised that this behaviour has led to an 80 pound weight loss in one year.

Congratulations on getting banded.

Remember, if you dont tell, you can always change your mind later and tell, but once you have told, you cant untell.

I would tell the ones who determine your work duties that you've had abdominal surgery and you are not allowed to lift anything for a while. You should easily be able to get a doctor's note to that effect.

I tell people that I had hiatal hernia repair, which is the truth, but I didn't know it until after the surgery. It's a great explanation and perfect for trying to cover up WLS if you don't want to tell anyone. Avoid the gall blatter story...that might come back to haunt you!

I can completely understand why you want to keep it private because once you tell everyone there is this expectation of losing a ton of weight in a short time frame(because most people are ignorant in regards to gastric banding vs bypass). They don't realize that with the band you aren't going to lose weight as fast. Since I was banded back on Sept 11 all of my coworkers ask me all the time how much weight I have lost and I hate to keep telling them the same number because I have hit a plateau. It's embarassing when people think you should be losing but your not, but they also don't understand the banding process. I pretty much had to tell my coworkers because of all the doctors appts and everything leading up to getting approved by insurance...I wish I didn't though so I wouldn't have this high expectation hanging over my head everyday...

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