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Funniest Things Your Kids Have Ever Said



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When my now 23 yr old daughter was 6 decided I needed to tell her that mom and dad were Santa. (we had just moved to an area where many of her friends were Jewish and I didn't want them to make fun of her). After I gave her all the facts I asked if she understood---"she said yes and then said "Well at least there is an Easter Bunny"!!!

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one day I was making grilled cheese for lunch. My daughter Brooke asked what was for lunch, and I told her grilled cheeses. She said "Is Kyle and Jack (her brothers) having boy cheeses?" thinking I said girl cheeses!

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My neighbor was making the bed one day and her then 4 year old son snuck up behind her and grabbed her in the privates as she bent over the bed and yelled,

"gotcha, right in the Virginia".....kids.

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A buddy told me this oen Show and Tell at School

His kids gets up in class....

Says my Daddy has a Tail!

And it grows out the FRONT!

Silence>>>>>>>>!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Stunned clasroom

___________________________________________________________

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not super funny, but my friends 10 year old girl came up and asked her--- "Mommy if you are getting the lap-band on your tummy and it make your tummy smaller- what about your but and legs? Why would you only want your tummy smaller,, She just didnt get it, about the losing weight and then the rest will kind of follow....

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When my great-nephew Gabe was just learning to talk, his uncle Jason showed him his tattoos and tried to get him to say "tattoo". Unfortunately....Gabe took it as Jason's name and called him Uncle Tattoo from then on!

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While disussing with my 4 year Brooke, why i wanted to lose weight, she asked how i got to be heavy. I told her well, when mommy was pregnant with u, my belly grew a whole lot and then i got pregnant with ur sister and my belly got even bigger and she thought for a sec and said, then what happened to your butt? LOL

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Today actually I was telling my 6 yr old about 4th of July -independance day etc.. and she said I know mommy, like when Mrs Starkey takes independence, you know when we are all there... LOL she meant attendance...lol

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When Spudboy was about 5 he came in the house crying becaue his friend Katie would never have a fat mamma. He thought that was just about the worst thing that could happen -- to have a skinny mamma

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Okay, here are mine.

When my oldest daughter was two, there was this very popular song about some guys girlfriend being a bitch, I don't remember the words at all, but anyways, my two year old was singing it, and I told her that the song said witch not bitch. Well, one evening she and I left a wedding and I thought she was sleeping in the car, so the song comes on the radio and I start singing it, word for word, she sits up straight in her car seat and says " I knew it said bitch, mom, why are you trying to confruse me" That was so funny.. LMBO

In an effort to teach my kids healthy eating habits, so that they don't grow up obese like myself, I often remind them that candy is a no-no and should be eaten in small quantities so that they can grow up to be healthy happy adults. Well we went to a birthday party and Kiara proceeded to ask me in front of everyone if I attended alot of birthday parties and ate alot of candy when I was a little girl and that's why I'm fat and got a big butt, oh my you should have seen me turn red with embarassment.

And my son, he loves to grab my boobs in public and say "Mom, you got big chiches?" (boobs), embarasses the crap out of me..

Well those are some of mine.

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Estela what's with boys always grabbing boobs? My son is always trying to poke them.

When my Roxanne was 6 we were making a wish on the chicken wish bone and I won, she says what did you wish for? I said you know I can’t tell you or my wish won’t come true but I can tell you that a long time ago I wished for you and my wish came true…she said ya daddy planted the seed, did you swallow it? I thought for a moment and said yes.

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And my son, he loves to grab my boobs in public and say "Mom, you got big chiches?" (boobs), embarasses the crap out of me..

too funny! I even laughed out loud!

The other day my good friend was over and Philip (2ys old) grabbed her shirt and said, "I unna see u bra". It tookk us a minute to figure out what he was saying.

Oh geesh... those males!

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OMG Paula! That is HILARIOUS!!!

I forbid Don to grab me in front of Dylan, because I don't want Dylan to think that that's ok to do to mommy. So far Don has been pretty good about remembering not to do it, but on occassion I have to swat his hands for being a bad BAD man! LOL

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When Spud was very small, like about 5, I was swearing up a blue streak. I musta stubbed my toe or something.. anyway, he says "Mother, I'm just a child, I shouldn't be exposed to such language." He called me "Mother" in a most formal way until he was about 12, then he switched to Mama, which he still calls me, unless he's being funny, then he calls me "Mum."

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