:laugh:Hey everyone hope is well....

Ok let me start by sayin has anyone saw the new Essence Cover?? Mo'Nique is on it an she looks great :thumbup: as i was reading her story on the bottom it started to talk about her fitness makeover:wink2: now i have read things on the internet that says she went under the knife lapband or gastric. NO NO NO she lost all her weight naturally and dont get me wrong i"m not hatin(well just a little:tt2:) but i really wish i could do it like her because she looks GREAT GREAT GREAT!!!!!! in the story she says she was 257 then and now she is 232 but when i saw her in concert she looked much bigger and when you see her on tv she also looks big, i know tv puts weight on you but she wasnt that big of a women. because im 290 and i feel i look around the same size as her (meaning body shape) but im MUCH bigger than her. it just makes me think i put so much time into the research on lap band i just dont want people to say well why didnt you try this why didnt you try that, because i have tried all of that but im still a big women. but i know the choice that i have made is my choice and its the right choice for me..:smile: quick joke in that issue it talks about men an how they LOVE us full-figured women and ladies these men are fine:tt1: i had to laugh because thats what my husband tell me i love all of my full-figured wife:laugh:

Its just something to talk about with all my Girlfriends. Dont forget ladies my last visit is wednesday hopefully and prayfully i will be getting my date very soon:smile2::confused::smile2:

TTYL!!!!!!!

hey girl, I haven't seen the issue yet. Listen don't worry about what people think. Monique did what is best for her and now you are doing what's best for you. I hope that she is successful long term. I know I have gained and lost the same 30 pounds the past 7 years. So keep your head up and do you. Besides you do realize that there was probably a tad bit of photoshop involved in her cover pic. I ain't hating, I swear ...

Hmm.. I've gotta pick up that issue for sure. I remember seeing something about getting ready to go healthy about a year ago. More power to her and I hope she keeps it off. I have so many before & after and after & before pics that I'm just tired. I know all of the diets and exactly how to do them like the diet-pro that I am. But... I need this lapband to help me to make a total lifestyle change. I just know it!

Good luck on your appointment!!

Yea I got my issue of Essence. It was nice to see that really the whole magazine was catered to plus sized women.

Haven't seem that issue and I wish Mo'Nique all the luck. All I can say is been there and done that (at one time lost 80 lbs and gained 100 Lbs) and I'm tried of the up and down. I ready for a new start with the band being the tool I need.

Good luck on getting your band date.:tt2:

Hey Sistas,

I've got that issue of Essence, and I must say (all enviousness aside) that Mo looks great!:wink2:

I think in the same issue Jennifer Hudson talks about working her tail off - literally - she's lost like 50 lbs in the last few months, and though she doesn't look a LOT smaller, she certainly is curvier.

There are some FLY clothes in the issue and some interviews with other curvy sistas. I had to laugh at all the men who said they love full-figured women...where were they when I was lookin'? :crying:

I wish I lived closer to NYC so I could attend a couple of those parties that the gentleman in the front of the issue arranges - I bet me and DH would have fun at those...I HATE being the biggest girl in da club, but since I take extra care with my appearance, I'm not worried about how I look so much anymore...being 40-something has done that for me.

I have a HOTT black-and-red leather dress that I LOVE to rock :w00t: I'm already saving to get the new one when I reach goal...

I am so glad I made the decision to be banded - now if only the docs and the "system" I'm working through would HURRY UP!!!!:tongue:

I must also agree Mo looks great in this month issue of Essence. Noticed right off how she had lost weight even before reading the article. I honestly was wondering if she had been bannded :thumbup:. Heard some rumors at one time that she had some kind of surgery, but whatever it is she looks good.. so keep up the good work Monique.

Ebony Rose I'm with you being a 40ish woman. I carry myself well at all times, if I say so myself :smile2: but do look forward to treating myself to something FANTASTIC when I reach goal. Think I will buy it sooner than later to have it for inspiration. :smile:

Hmm I will have to go get the issue I haven't seen it yet. And just because you lose weight and get healthy doesn't mean we'll turn into skinny b%$#! HAHA!! Our curves will be even more pronounced and we will be healthy which is the main goal. I know my husband just said "I want you to lose weight but I like your thigs and your butt and I hope they don't disappear". It's good to know that people do like our curvy shapes...

Amen to that, Enigma!

Part of my curiosity is concerning how people who don't know us now (or didn't know us when we were heavy) will treat us. Unfortunately, I think some will treat us better once we are "normal" sized women (notice I put that in quotes) than they would have (or did) when we were heavy. :girl_hug:

I know for me, I'd like to do the "Pretty Woman" thing - walk into a few stores where I've been treated less-than-well as a full-figured woman and let them know that now I'm smaller, I won't be spending any of my wardrobe money on them! I plan to save almost all of what I would normally spend (I will have to buy a few things during my transition) and do a big shopping spree at the end when I reach my goal. :rolleyes2:

I'm eagerly anticipating going into some stores that I wouldn't necessarily shop in, paying some prices I might not ordinarily pay (for better-quality clothes) and having myself a really good time! :girl_hug:

I haven't seen this issue either. I will have to pick it up. Girl, don't listen to what people say. I know that it's easier said than done but it's the best advice I can tell you. There are a few of my co-workers that know I am having the LB done but the majority of them don't know. (I don't really care if people know that I am having the procedure done or not though.) With that said....I was sharing with one of my co-workers that I have become quiet close with, that I was having the LB done on 10/15. Right away, without even knowing me for that long, she starts lecturing me and telling me all the things that could go wrong. It's easy for her to judge and lecture because she is a size 4 and has never struggled with her weight her whole life. In fact, she has a child and you would never know with her curvy little figure! :w00t: People don't stop to realize what they are saying, whether they are doing it with good intentions or not. So....I decided that if people heard that I am having the procedure done then fine. If they don't know I am not telling. Not because I am embarrased but because people are quick to judge instead of trying to put themselves in your shoes.

I almost let her comment get to me but after I thought about it I didn't let it bother me. Like I said, she doesn't know me and the struggles and the things that I have tried to lose weight.

I still love her too death but realize that I can't get mad at her for something she has no idea about. I just won't discuss the matter with her anymore. :cry_smile: That's how I handled it and I can tell you that I haven't lost any sleep over the situation! :cool2:

Keep your head up! I hope that helps!!!!

I really enjoyed that issue! The fashion was off the hook. I am going to get a pair of the jeans from LB I think they fit with the same concept as Apple Bottoms so the waist doesn't gap in the back.

Mo'nique does look good and we'll never know what she had done but let's me honest we are all professional women, some with a hubby and kids if our "job" was to tell jokes and act and that would be easier (not saying easy b/c we all know Oprah's deal) but it is a lot harder to work a 9-5 and keep all these balls in the air and take care of ourselves and cook and clean and wash and cater to different things and we can barely find time or $$ for a personal trainer so it is what it is! I don't knock artist I wish I could afford a chef and a personal trainer on call but alas that's not my deal in life! But she does look good plus her new movie sounds so dark but a good break for her!

I agree Monique looks great. For all those who decide on WLS, and decide to hide it, my thing is.... It was no secret how large we all are to begin with, what is the big deal admitting we needed help to get rid of the excess weight. People should share in their WLS experience to hopefully encourage other people to make an informed decision. The only shame in WLS is not admitting you had it. These days I'm starting to think all of Hollywood has gone lapband crazy.

Mornin' Sistas,

I think the issue with people not telling about their lap band surgery is the nearly-automatic condemnation from those who don't know what it's like to be clinically obese (or those in denial).

My health issues (diabetes, high blood pressure) made me a good candidate for the band - without those, I would have had to be even heavier in order to 'qualify'. I've struggled with my weight since I was 12 years old. Nothing has worked for very long - the only other thing I think might have worked would be if I were a contestant on 'Biggest Loser'. I think Jillian could have worked / pounded the weight off of me like she did last season's winner Ali.

I was unsuccessful in my application for the show, so I've taken my life, my health and my destiny into my OWN hands by going through the surgery process. I don't mind discussing it with people, but I'm not broadcasting it.

Some people - and in some cases your family members are the worst - just don't understand that the Nike motto "Just Do It" doesn't work when you're more than 50 lbs overweight. I've read that studies indicate that once you hit 50 lbs overweight it's extremely hard to lose the weight without extraordinary measures.

Whatever it takes, I'm willing to do - relative to getting my band. I hope to have my final appt with the surgeon and the anesthesist within the next 2 weeks and a date for banding shortly thereafter. I'm still hoping to be banded in October, but as time moves on, I'm less optimistic about that...

I agree Ebony Rose,family usually is the hardest group of critics. People are entitled to their privacy either way it goes, but as we have seen, celebrities, especially will lie about altering themselves. Look at the whole Star Jones thing. Her having WLS was nothing to be ashamed of neither was it a big surprise. If Jennifer Hudson, Queen Latifah or Mo'nique had WLS, I feel that them professing their decision can put them in a position to help other people make a better choice about their lives. For years, Mo'nique and other celebs go on a tyrant about being a big beautiful black woman, and there is nothing wrong with big women having confidence, but they did not promote the health risks associated with being overweight. Now that so many disparities plague our culture, now everyone wants to get fit but not all are being honest on their methods they are using. I've been the biggest person in my family my whole life and they all accepted and loved me for who I was. In no way was I shamed or groomed to have a low esteem because of my weight. To this day being 5'2 and 270 lbs doesn't stop me from being physically active, doesn't make me insecure and never stopped me from finding a good man. But turning 31 and seeing the grim future ahead as far as having diabetes and heart problems, I decided that losing the excess weight will increase my chances of spending a long life with my children and hopefully their children when they have them. If this was better supported and more broadcasted in a positive light, I may have made this decision a long time ago. I no longer have to be overweight and happy, I can be slimmer and healthier and be even more happy thanks to this alternative.

I have not read the issue of Essence, however, I am happy for Monique and her weight loss. People think it is easier for people with money to lose weight and keep it off, however, I think it is harder. I mean, I think I would be gigantic if I could afford to eat where ever and when ever I want. If I want Italian food, I can just fly to Italy. I think that's part of the deal with Oprah. Not only can she get any food she wants, but extremely good food. Imagine what size some of us would be if that's what we could do. As far as tellling people, I told everyone. I also let them know that I have been dealing with my weight all of my life and if it were as easy as some of them say, then why do people have weight problems. Telling people gives me the feeling of accountability. Accountability because I know that they are watching but I also know that many many black women are looking because they want something that will work for them also, they just don't want to be the first one to try. I will be the first then. WE ARE DYING FOR A PIECE OF PIE OR CHICKEN!!! I have to be the one in my family to stop this or I doom my daughters to a lifetime of health issues. And I always tell my daughters, don't be typical, stereotypical or statistical. And when it comes to weight, being overweight and black is just that. I also tell them not to be that angry black female too, but that is a different lecture