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What is the rudest thing someone has said to you?!?!



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We were at a waterpark for a week for summer vacation in July (yea, that was fun):mad: Anyway, we were coming out of the changing rooms at the entrance, and my little girl came up to me and said "mommy those boys called you fat).. It was packed and I was mortified! I vowed when I got home, I was going to do something...and I did. I had the lap band done on August 28. Hopefully next summer I can actually enjoy myself instead of being embarrased.:sad:

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Oh I have plenty. I come from a Russian family that doesn't have a filter on their mouth. When I was younger: My mom's Russian Friends told me "you have such a pretty face but you won't ever find a husband if you stay this fat". I had random guys make comments about my weight and those comments hurt but I got over them fast. I think the one that hurt me the most is my now ex-husband used to say. Into 1st year of our relationship - he told me that he didn't want to go to his family reunion with me because I was overweight and that he was embarrassed. Either it was my very low self-esteem or the way he said it, i was upset about it but forgave him. He would make comments like that through out the 9 years of being together. He justified it by saying "I care more about you being healthy not being skinny". Then when I gave birth to our beautiful daughter and gained 30 lbs because of pregnancy and because I was in the hospital by her beside for 6 months...he said he wants a divorce because he is no longer attracted to me and he can't brag to his friends about me. So he left me for a girl who looks exactly like me ..but skinny. yeah...i think thinks that was probably the most hurtful experience I had to deal with when it came to my weight.

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I was having dinner with my grandparents a couple of weeks back. They were visiting from out of town. She proceeded to tell me that she has had a hard time keeping weight off her entire life, and has probably lost 200 lbs in her 76 yrs on this planet, but she's doing it, by-golly. She continued to tell me that my cousin has tried very hard and has been successful at keeping her weight off, and said "your cousin would be big too if she let herself go" - Like I'm purposefully let myself go, like I haven't tried like mad to get this weight off, like I am taking the easy road - HA... Water off a ducks back, baby!

I told my parents, they got all wide eyed and said "she said that?" - I love my parents!

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I can't really tell you which one of the many comments has been the rudest, the one at 12 years old when I was already a size 44DD bra and I was playing in the park when a group of grown men drove by and yelled "hey big tits want some of this" and proceeded to show me their genitals, or my husband of 31 years telling me not to go into the Water cause someone might "mistaken me as a whale and use a harpoon on me" or being called "the Amazon queen" by an anesthiologist, or being told "you'll never fit into the MRI machine, you MUCH too fat" by a physician. . . and it continues for the whole of my 48 years. . . I'll let ya'll pick which one was the most rude. I have become very numb to all comments lately. . wonder why?

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Erykah, your post makes me want to cry. :w00t: Each one of those incidents is just horrible, horrible. I am speechless.

Yes Marie, and the saddest part of all, I just used to smile and keep it all in, I was 22 years old when everything overwhelmed me, new baby, being even fatter that I actually attempted suicide to escape the hurting, but of course, I was rescued by my hubbie. . . I have become so staunch and have grown a very thick skin during my life. . but I continue to treat those who hurt me the same way I would love to be treated, with kindness and respect, never with hurt and resentment.

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Yes Marie, and the saddest part of all, I just used to smile and keep it all in, I was 22 years old when everything overwhelmed me, new baby, being even fatter that I actually attempted suicide to escape the hurting, but of course, I was rescued by my hubbie. . . I have become so staunch and have grown a very thick skin during my life. . but I continue to treat those who hurt me the same way I would love to be treated, with kindness and respect, never with hurt and resentment.
Erykah, you are a better person than I am, seriously. I carry my resentment with me. I know it only hurts me more in the long run but I can't bring myself to be nice to those who have said cruel things to me.

Where are you in your lap band journey? Just starting out?

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Erykah, you are a better person than I am, seriously. I carry my resentment with me. I know it only hurts me more in the long run but I can't bring myself to be nice to those who have said cruel things to me.

Where are you in your lap band journey? Just starting out?

Hi Marie, I am "thinking mode" It has taken me 1 1/2 years to convince hubbie dear to let me even go to a seminar. . he thinks yes I need to lose weight, but not that way, he thinks I'm going to die. . i did phentermine for over 1 year (I was buying it over the net) but after so long, your body goes funky, stopped and regained all the weight (very heartbreaking) so right now, I have my financing approved for the whole amount, have the seminar set up, am talking to ya'll, and I'm thinking if hubbie says no after the seminar, I'm going to have to tell him "sorry bud, this is for me" and go ahead with it. he has told me many times he will never support me if I do this, but I think if he is coming to seminar, maybe he is reconsidering things. . . wish me luck, seminar is on the 23rd at 6pm. . . I've prayed about it, but sometime God is too busy with more important things then listening to my little requests. . . :w00t:

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Erykah,

This may sound "preachy" but God cares about your "little" things, too. I promise. I am so sorry for all you have been through. I read a book not too long ago that helped me heal a little bit. It's called Captivating by Stasi Eldredge. You should check it out. :thumbup:

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Erykah,

This may sound "preachy" but God cares about your "little" things, too. I promise. I am so sorry for all you have been through. I read a book not too long ago that helped me heal a little bit. It's called Captivating by Stasi Eldredge. You should check it out. :thumbup:

No, it doesn't sound preachy at all. . thank you for your caring along with Marie. . I've really never talked openly about these issues but it sure is nice to let it out for once. . it's like allowing something to leave that's been there for a long long time. . . Marie, after I read your quote, i looked back at what it was that was so sad, it WAS sad, I don't think I've ever realized just how bad people have been to me throughout my life. . . uhh it's not nice, but again I can't grudge those people, even now with my patients when they see me smile at them and ask grouchily "what are you smiling at" I'll always respond "I smile for those who can not". . . . I'll get that book by the way. . thanks

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uhh it's not nice, but again I can't grudge those people, even now with my patients when they see me smile at them and ask grouchily "what are you smiling at" I'll always respond "I smile for those who can not". . . . I'll get that book by the way. . thanks

Wow, Erykah, your attitude is inspirational! I wish you all the luck in the world with your weight loss journey, you seem to have a heart of gold. God bless you:thumbup:

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I have had many diff things said to me also. One time when I was about 15 and weighed about 160lbs. ( Wish I could weigh that again) I use to be on a soft ball team through my school. One day my team was practicing. I was running to catch the ball or either running the bases. A teenage boy started yelling earthquake over and over again. I never did like that boy at all.

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I have had many diff things said to me also. One time when I was about 15 and weighed about 160lbs. ( Wish I could weigh that again) I use to be on a soft ball team through my school. One day my team was practicing. I was running to catch the ball or either running the bases. A teenage boy started yelling earthquake over and over again. I never did like that boy at all.

Kids are terribly cruel aren't they? Sorry to hear that happened to you. . unfortunately we are scarred for life because of these events and it can make trusting people a little bit of a challenge can't it? Soon we wouldn't have to worry about that anymore. . . soon. . . .

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Hmmmmm.... there are so many things. Where should I start?

About 15 years ago I was dating via the personal ads. There was one guy I arranged to meet at a restauraunt. We met outside. When I introduced myself he got a strange look on his face and said "Sorry, you're too big for me"then turned and walked away. a-hole. I never lied. I always made sure guys knew I was a "big girl". Plus.... he wasn't all that skinny himself.

The thing that made my final decision for lapband?? I had my then 4 year old daughter at McDonalds Playplace. This brat about 10 or so kept coming up to me and asking me why I was so fat?? Then she tried to karate kick me in the belly. All this in front of my daughter. :laugh:

The thing that still hurts the most?? About 25 years ago I was friends with this guy named Steve. We were together all the time if we weren't at work or college, we were together on the phone. I knew I was just the nice fat girl who was his friend, but I still thought out friendship meant something. He had a crush on my younger, thin sister, but that didn't bug me cuz we were friends.

Last year a friend of ours passed away, and I called to tell him. I said this is Julie W...... from years ago. His reply? "Oh, yeah, Sheilas sister" I still want to cry thinking about it. :cursing:

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You know what I think is rude??? People telling you that you look SO much better after losing weight and paying attention to you when you lose weight, when they couldn't care less about you before when you were fat!! That's what's under my skin right now!!

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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      1. LeighaTR

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      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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