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So emotional and can't stop crying...



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Ok so yesterday I found out that I was approved for surgery and I got my date today (July 2nd). I was so HAPPY for about 15 minutes and since then I have been so emotional. I'll be happy one minute and then sad the next. For some reason, I feel like I should have 5000 people to call and share my joy and feel like I have no one. My husband said, "that's great!" and that was the end. My co-workers are judgemental so I haven't been able to share much with them. My family is 500 miles away so it makes celebrating with them impossible. So... today I ran to my "medicine" that I've depended on for 24 years --- food. I baked homemade chocolate cupcakes and ate 2 (no frosting) and cried. UGH!! What's wrong with me? I have already lost 30 lbs during my 6 months but haven't lost any this week. I literally see all my fat coming back... Being so emotional doesn't help. Up until today this week I have stuck to my pre-op diet w/ Protein shakes for bfast, 3 oz. of meat/2 veggies for lunch, repeated at dinner. This is so hard for me.

Sorry for the burst of emotions, I just honestly feel like I have no one else to cry/talk to. Right now, it's almost better to just type it out... even if no one actually reads it. Please pray for me and for the strength I will need within this next month to deal with all of these emotions. Thanks. :crying:

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You will be in my prayers...I kindof went thru the samethings myself...and my family close...my husband was like whatever and still is...I think he is actually alittle upset that I went through with it...

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yeah, my husband was against it at first and didn't try to hold it back. atleast now he's trying to fake it... :crying:

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Hey Amanda,

We have to same surgery date! I am sure your as excited as i am about this journey. If you need to talk about anything you can private message me or email me @ mjsprague1017@aol.com. My husband did really want me to get the surgery but now that he knows more about it...he is more supportive. I dont want to tell to many people bc i dont want to everyones critical eyes watching what i eat ALL the time! But i think that keeping in contact with you would be awesome since we both have the same day and both dont have much support. Keep in touch PLEASE! and tell those cupcakes NO!

Mandi Jo

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You do have people that care because those of us on this forum care! And you are in for an emotional rollercoaster. I've been banded for two weeks and it has been very much a rollercoaster. I'm down 16 lbs in two weeks and that is keeping me happier. But it is hard. It is like giving up a huge part of yourself. I started on soft foods today but it is still hard to eat for various reasons. I'm so glad I went through with it and you will be happy to get it past you as well. Just hang in there. You are normal to feel so many emotions! You are in my thoughts and prayers.

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Guest BikiniBeachy

I think it's normal, so much is changing and is going to change.

I received my denial letter this week, my policy had a hidden exclusion that I cannot fight.

Try and remember, people with denials would give anything, ANYTHING for that date! :crying: Please let me live vicariously through you and be happy! Bless you!

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Hey Amanda,

I have the same date too! You'll see, in a few months from now you'll be so happy you had it done. Even though I haven't yet either, I have a great feeling about it. Just hang in there and keep strong! Good luck and let us know how you're doing.

Lisa :crying:

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Thanks so much guys... Like I said, I literally see my fat coming back. Ironically, after submitting this thread, my husband gave me a pre-anniversary present which was a dress and a pair of shoes. It was sweet, except he saw a new dress that I bought and bought the same size. It's a size too small b/c it was the dress that I WANT to fit into and will soon! I burst into tears and he thought that I didn't like it. Now I feel bad b/c I made him feel bad. It's the first time in a long time he's bought anything for me and I had to react like a hormonal teenager!! UGH... You guys are the best though. I don't know where I would be without you all!

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I felt the same way I cried the nite before the surgery almost backed out I am so glad I did not back out.i had surgery on 4 10 08, have lost 18 lbs so far. hang in there.

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I just had surgery, May 19, 2008. I didn't tell too many people. I did not want to hear their opinions on my decision and frankly I did not care what they thought.

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Awww Amanda *hug* :crying:

Remember...food's been your friend, (in my case my therapist told me pizza Hut was my boyfriend!!) confidant, most loyal supporter. It's an emotional addiction. I had to go through the "death" of my friend of food.

I cried when I couldn't have a meatball sandwich on my preop diet. Seriously.................lol!! It's funny now because if I really wanted one, I could go get one. I'd nibble and eat 1/60th of it but it wouldn't satisfy what I wanted it to...It wouldn't sit heavy and comfortable in my tummy and make me feel all fat and happy and lethargic. Basically, I could eat the food, but it wouldn't "medicate" me anymore by that overstuffed feeling.

So yeah, I cried, threw a tantrum alone in my car. My ex husband was not very supportive. It was a time I needed to grow, needed to face that. My suggestion is to let it come. Just cry Amanda...be pissed off you have to get banded. Get pissed off you can't eat like you wanna...it will absolutely and totally pass. Within days. And that little toxic crap that's kept you fat all these years will have lightened a bit :thumbup:

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I feel your pain. I am having my surgery on 6/3. Today was an emotional roller coaster. I went for my pre-op admit. testing which went by very quickly less than 1 1/2 hours. Here I am at the hospital and I see a friend that I haven't seen in yrs. that works there, she of wants to know why am I here. I tell her that I am fine, yeah right! I finally told her what I was going for and she thought I was crazy!!! Maybe I am. I am also doing this for my daughter who is 16 1/2 and having her surgery on 7/8. We are going to take this new journey together. I was fine after the testing but......Going for the Pre-op class put me into a reality check! I was very nervous and anxious with all the things I should have been doing since Tuesday. My hubby says he is supportive but never asks me anything. He will have a reality check this summer when both my daughter and I are on liquids etc! People really don't know what we are getting ready for unless they follow us to appointments and support groups. Now I am getting comments like are you sure you want to do this, you are not fat....well at 228 lbs i wouldn't call that being average or thin!

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I got my surgery date, too, and I've been facing a round of different emotions. The tough ones always seem to hit me at night, but I have confidence during the day. I use a couple of things as my mantras . . . .all things that I have read here. Pretty much stuff like, "You'll be able to eat most of the foods that you ate before, just a LOT LESS of it." And how much easier it is to lose weight when the overwhelming need to stuff yourself with food is eased or even removed by the band. I'm just concentrating on all of the positives. I also go and look at people's before and after pics, it's so inspirational.

I'm also trying to see all of the good in everyday life around me. Like today when I was at the mall. I walked by Lane Bryant and practically grunted to myself . . . thinking . . . it won't be long until I never have to shop there again. And practically STARING at this thin person in Express buying a top I could only dream of wearing, thinking that next year that would be ME.

In fact, I think I'm going to go buy a tank top just for the heck of it. I'll hang it somewhere where I can see it just to keep me excited about my new tank top. Yeah . . . I think that sounds like a plan.

Hang in there.

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You can depend on us. We are here for you. That being said, it is very normal for you to be emotional. I cried big time before surgery. Everything will be okay. This should be an exciting time for you. Good luck.

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I got my date today and everything went really fast. I have all kinds of emoitions as well. I havn't told anyone in my family except husband of course. I feel kind of scared and actually thought about cancelling. Today i just kind of felt depressed after coming from the doctor when I should be happy. I really think it is kind of like I'm mourning food right now. But I know once I start losing and see that it's not that bad and I wake up from surgery i will start to feel happier. My date is June 5th

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