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7 Months Out, Need Motivation



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Hi Everyone,

I've benefited immensely from reading all the content on here and am wondering if you guys have helpful advice for me. I'm 7 months out and have been losing nicely till about a month or 2 ago. My appetite and hunger have returned and I'm finding it very difficult to stick to my plan without cheating, reach my Protein and fluid goals somewhat, and push myself to work out. Some days my cheating is so bad, it scares me. Obviously the scale hasn't moved downward, it only keeps fluctuating by a few pounds according to my intake. I haven't seen a significant loss in a while. While I'm so happy about my weight loss, I still really want to lose more and am scared about being able to maintain the loss if at 7 months out it's so easy to eat so much junk. I'm slowly building new habits, but at the same time, old habits die hard. I want to hear from you what helped you stick to your plan like glue, what motivated you day after day? How do I resist the urge to cheat? Any and all advice welcome. Looking forward to your replies!

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If I "cheat" for more than a couple days, my body tells me it's not happy. I have a specific, consistent routine and that includes what foods I eat. Eating poorly makes me feel horrible. That's my motivation; I can and do eat things that aren't on my diet in limited amounts, but it's one meal in an entire day and I'm very careful about portions. I rarely put more food in front of myself than I am comfortable eating to eliminate the temptation (even in restaurants, I will ask for a box WITH my plate and put away everything I don't intend to eat in that sitting before I even pick up a fork.)

Basically, I've been there, I've done that enough times to know that a couple days of having to eat extra-healthy to get back on track is a frustrating thing I don't feel is worth it anymore, so I stick with my plan really closely. I'm two weeks short of being 18 months out and my primary issue is being able to keep what little weight I have left ON. I actually have to track my food to make sure I am eating enough to maintain.

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I am lucky, I cant do fatty greasy foods. So a lot of take away food is off my menu. I have never been a cake or biscuit eater but I can eat chocolate, pop corn and baked Snacks. I buy them small single serve packs that limit my intake. I ration myself to only have one in the evening if I have managed to eat all my Protein

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what keeps me on track is never, ever wanting to be morbidly obese again. That's not to say I don't have an occasional day when I really blow it. I do. But I get back on track the very next day.

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I think the best way to resist temptation is to avoid it as much as possible. Don't buy junk food. If it's not around, you can't eat it. I take it a step further and use online grocery shopping (pickup or delivery) so I don't even have to go into the store. I shop mostly from my favorites lists that only contain healthy foods. On the rare occasion I go into the store, all of the temptations are in my face and I find myself tempted to buy something I shouldn't, "just this once." The more you have to face temptation, the more mental effort it takes to resist and the more likely you are to give in.

Another thing that helps is having healthy, delicious foods readily available. If you like to cook, go on Pinterest to find healthy recipes that you look forward to trying. I live alone, so I always have a lot of leftovers that I freeze in individual portions, so I have a variety of healthy meals that I can easily grab from the freezer and heat in the microwave with some cauliflower rice. I meal prep a bunch of salads every week and have a variety of Skinny Girl salad dressings on hand. I eat a lot of sugar-free Jello with sugar-free meringue (made with pasteurized egg whites so it's safe to eat raw), and sugar-free meringue Cookies. I also eat Protein Bars (Built Bars are my favorite) as a healthy-ish treat.

3 hours ago, catwoman7 said:

what keeps me on track is never, ever wanting to be morbidly obese again. That's not to say I don't have an occasional day when I really blow it. I do. But I get back on track the very next day.

This is so important, and it's really easy to take for granted once you lose the weight -- to forget how hard it is to live with morbid obesity. I recently saw a guy at work who was so big that he looked like he was struggling to walk out to the parking lot, and my heart broke for him because I remember being that big. I don't really think about it much anymore, but there was a time that I dreaded walking to and from the parking lot or up a couple of flights of stairs because it was so hard when I was carrying an extra 200 pounds. And that's not to mention all the social stigma on being fat, which I never want to experience again.

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I'm not sure motivation is what you need. I think you need better habits. As you said, old habits die hard. You're just not going to wake up one day and suddenly start following your plan, track your intake religiously, exercise regularly, etc.

Instead, you have to pick one teeny, tiny change to make at a time. Pick something that seems almost insignificant, and do JUST that one thing for 2-3 weeks until it becomes the new normal for you. Once that becomes habit, then pick another small change to make, and do that one for several weeks until it's automatic as well. Keep building new habits until the old bad habits have been replaced by the new healthy habits you actually want.

As an example, maybe you've found yourself having a glass of wine every evening. Instead of trying to quit cold turkey, try drinking three ounces instead of four. Or if it was two glasses a night, maybe a few days a week, you only have one glass. After a few weeks of that, maybe you skip it entirely one day a week. You get the idea. The changes need to be so small you don't really notice the change.

Another strategy that can really help is to play mind tricks with yourself. Maybe you really LOVE chocolate. Convince yourself that you hate the taste of chocolate. Go ahead and eat it, but the entire time, think of all the sensations about it that you don't like, such as the weird melting sensation, the earthy flavor, etc. You may find after a while of doing this that you really don't crave chocolate much anymore. The mind games don't even have to make much sense, what's important is that you actually start to believe it over time.

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If you know the plan and can't stick to it just a few months after taking the big big step to have surgery then I would seriously advocate finding a therapist who specialises in bariatric surgery patients. I say this only with support and sympathy - I do not do 'holier than thou' ever. So many people have travelled the same road. It is SO SO hard not to eat when our hunger comes back. What we need to ensure is that the prospect of eating healthy food is preferable to the option to eat crap. If you can re-frame your relationship with food now you still have plenty of time to make the most of your chance.

I do wish you the very best of luck.

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I do a lot of what SpartanMaker suggests and it does work! When I’ve gotten of track, I start with drinking Water to visually see that I am taking care of myself.

I also tell someone I trust. Sometimes just admitting problems makes it more real and then it’s easier to make that small tiny step.

Then I hold myself accountable by talking with the dietitian at my center. I can go into the center and weigh in monthly or every six months and talk with the dietitian.

Finally, I realized I was using food for comfort. I was thinking about Snacks instead of how to improve my life/job situation. It was time for therapy because I needed a professional to coach me into healthier life choices overall. It wasn’t just about food, but food was a symptom that was easy to see.

Only you know what amount/level of support you need. I hope that you make some changes to get the real live support you deserve. Starting here was a great beginning!

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Have you considered seeking the support of a therapist? It seems you may need some help dealing with the why you eat & why you make the food choices you do. They’ll also help you identify strategies to better manage those urges when they arise. Many find therapy extremely helpful.

The hardest part of this is understanding your relationship with food, recognising them when they arise & better managing them. We never completely get rid of those urges but we can take away a lot of their power.

As @BigSue suggested get rid of the food temptation out of your house. If you don’t buy them you can’t eat them. And delete any home delivery apps on your phone. It was one of the best thing I did. Look for some healthier alternatives instead of traditional ‘junk’ food for those times the urge for something salty or sweet or whatever is too strong.

And like @catwoman7 what keeps me motivated is not wanting to be the weight I was again. I want to be able to play with my nieces & nephews. I want to feel better & healthier. I want to easily be able to buy beautiful stylish clothing.

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23 hours ago, SpartanMaker said:

The mind games don't even have to make much sense, what's important is that you actually start to believe it over time.

Are you a politician, Spartan? lol 😉

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Remember, you are still in your honeymoon stage. Take full advantage of this time!! Those Snacks will still exist after you hit your goal 😊

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what keeps me on track is never, ever wanting to be morbidly obese again. That's not to say I don't have an occasional day when I really blow it. I do. But I get back on track the very next day.
For me, 100% this too. I never want to be morbidly obese again and all the things that go with it, including not being able to fit in seats or pain from unnecessary health problems. That is my main motivation.

Even naturally thin people will sometimes have too big of a meal, or eat unhealthy foods. It doesn't even phase them. So after all these years, I have finally wrapped my head around the fact that it is not an all or nothing situation anymore, I just go back to my normal routine the next meal. It took me a long time not to take one slip too serious. So the majority of time, my fridge is stocked with nutritious food so if I get the nibbles, I can reach for a handful of strawberries but sometimes I just really feel like having an apple fritter lol. It is a meal to meal, day to day, month to month, year to year consistency for following my plan 80 to 90% of the time.

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Right! So the hard part is those days when it doesn't feel like honeymoon, but like a diet. When the scale doesn't budge, and the hunger and cravings are there big time.

On 3/1/2023 at 5:57 AM, qtdoll said:

Remember, you are still in your honeymoon stage. Take full advantage of this time!! Those Snacks will still exist after you hit your goal 😊

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On 3/1/2023 at 1:52 PM, Tomo said:

For me, 100% this too. I never want to be morbidly obese again and all the things that go with it, including not being able to fit in seats or pain from unnecessary health problems. That is my main motivation.

Even naturally thin people will sometimes have too big of a meal, or eat unhealthy foods. It doesn't even phase them. So after all these years, I have finally wrapped my head around the fact that it is not an all or nothing situation anymore, I just go back to my normal routine the next meal. It took me a long time not to take one slip too serious. So the majority of time, my fridge is stocked with nutritious food so if I get the nibbles, I can reach for a handful of strawberries but sometimes I just really feel like having an apple fritter lol. It is a meal to meal, day to day, month to month, year to year consistency for following my plan 80 to 90% of the time.

This is so so true! I'm so all or nothing. I need to work on that.

You guys are great! Your advice is spot on and so helpful

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