What are some things that people say or do after you've had the lap band surgery that really kind of irritate you? Such as always asking how much weight you've lost or if you should really be eating something? I'm thinking about putting together a list for my friends and family in case I become irritated with them for no apparent reason.

Thanks

When I told a young friend (who is like a son to me), he made the comment about "the easy way". I explained to him that it took me a very long time, a lot of prayers and tears to get to the point to ask for this kind of help....the only kind that would really help me and people like me. My own sons who have seen the struggles I have been thru have been supportive from the very start. On a positive note, my mother cried with happiness when I announced I was getting the lapband!

I am a blabber mouth , as my hubby would say. I tell everyone about my band, and if they choose not to support my decision I make sure not to discuss it with them further. I have found I get a lot more support from co-workers and friends if I am up front and honest with me. My husband is a closet bandster-except our friends and family know about it. My co-workers know about it too-I work in a medical Clinic and a few of my co-workers who have had gastric bypass are a good support too, even though the procedures are clearly different. The other thing is we live in small community and its hard not to notice when we start dropping the weight and are out walking more.(pop-230) The only negative I got from it was actually a close friend of mine who struggles with her weight and is having some medical problems because of her weight feels it is too drastic of a step for anyone to take. Thus we don't discuss my band as she isn't convinced surgery is a way to go. She thinks portion control is the way-well I know portion control didn't work for me until now, when you just can't eat that much and you start to choose your foods more carefully. I even had a older gal just about go bezerk on me as I was discussing with the pastor's wif how Rich and I were doing. She thought we had the bypass done, so I had to explain it to her. Not many people seem to know about in the midwest! I love my band and talking about it!

I tell anyone and everyone who asks. I have even given the books I have on the Lap Band to some of my customers to read, and I am forever giving out web sites about the band. I want the word out..it is amazing to me how so many think I had the bypass until I actually take the time to explain to them No I had the Lap band..I actually have had 3 of my customers have the surgery done and they all have gone to Ortiz and are extremely pleased with their bands..

I have no intention on telling my inlaws. They are the most judgemental group of people I've ever met....and somehow, I promise, if they were to find out, they would try and make it about them (like how are we ever going to plan for dinner if Sharon can't eat).

I'm sure my husband will blab at some point though :paranoid

I have told EVERYBODY that will listen to me!!!!!! I have had nothing but support and good wishes. I do get everyone asking me almost daily [How much weight have you lost?] I do get sick of it. I am still new at this band thing and am still scared of the scale, so I don't weigh myself very often. When I do I am happy but can't get over the fear of gaining I agree that it is a personal decision and we all are different.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU ALL!

Terri

I told many people, including my co-workers--all of whom have been very kind and supportive. There is one, however, who had gastric bypass surg several years ago and she is constantly after me--asking all kinds of what she must consider "insider" type questions, like, 'Hi, you look great, is your hair falling out yet?". I was stunned, and I said "no, its not falling out now or ever, since I am following the rules, taking my Vitamins and eating enough Protein." That shut her up for that weekend shift.

another nurse I know and like very much just had gastric bypass and is down 40 pounds already--looks and feels terrific--we sat and chatted the other night at work--we feel the same way about weight loss and goals, etc....very nice to talk with her.

but I swear, if that other one asks me about hair loss one more time, I am going to tell her that yes, all my pubic hair is now gone! ha ha

Christina - very creative solution with your sister. I think you did the right thing. Will your mom keep it from her?

Jamie - My personal opinion is that you should not tell your husband's family if it would worry or upset them or cause nagging, etc. They have no particular right to know. You and your husband are allowed to have things that are just between the two of you (and anyone else you choose to share with).

As for me, I have been very selective about who I've told, so I do not get any dumb comments. The only thing that annoys me is something very understandable. I am very tight and usually cannot take more than a few bites of anything. So when people see me take just two or three bites and then stop (and they don't know I'm banded), they will naturally say something like, "That's all you're going to eat?" This happens especially with people at work. They know I've lost weight and I'm afraid they're going to think I'm anorexic or something. I'll usually just say, "I'm full" or "I'll eat more later" but it's not really a satisfying response.

Nancy

OMG-thats a good one-I will have to do the pubic hair one-I do have one co-worker that asked if was losing my hair, I said no it is the only thing on me that is naturally THIN! She hasn't aske me again either!

Claraluz- Thanks & yes I do believe that my Mom can keep a secret. However, if she were to slip up one evening over a glass of wine or something, than I guess I will cross that bridge at that time. I do know that eventually when the weightloss is very noticable that my one sister will probably guess what I did. Again at that point I woin't lie any more but tell her yes I did- But really don't wish to discuss any details & change the subject. Whew! Gives me the chills just thinking about it. Come to think about it maybe I WILL LIE & say I've been really running alot more & taking this great new diet pill.LOL LOL I think that may be easier.

I told everyone I know and haven't regretted it at all. The MOST annoying thing I encounter (besides those occassional cravings for a food you know won't work well) is the eating habits of others. My husband absolutely disgusts me when we eat together. He eats so FAST! We went out for a valentines lunch yesterday and his plate was clear before I had more than 5 or 6 bites... Then he tried to take a bite from my plate and I smacked his hand. I was so frustrated... My brother and step-father eat the same way but it is so nice eating with my mom because she is slower and I don't feel so rushed. At normal meals at home my husband doesn't drive me so crazy about eating fast because we kind of go at our own pace and do our own thing but visiting or going out for meals I definitely notice it more. I never noticed this before banding. LOL... Teresa

Christina, you don't have to lie, but you have the right to your own privacy. Some people are just nosey. They aren't personally interested in WLS and it's benefits. Those are the same types that ask you how much something costs or how much is your paycheck.

Once you get to dropping some weight, you will feel more energetic and will be doing more physically...and this does help you lose weight faster. So you won't be lying. As far as eating, most people are so busy shoveling it in, they don't even notice what you are or aren't eating.

One thing to remember, once you tell, you can't untell.

Just tell everyone your eating less and working out more. If any offers you food tell them your stuffed and just had a big meal. If you do end up with food in front of you have a dog near by and slip him some food.

This is such a good topic. For me I had mixed emotions about telling anyone because I wanted no negative feedback. I told my husband and 2 daughters, my boss (who I really didnt want to tell but she needs to approve my leave) and 2 friends. So far even the boss has been very supportive. I wonder what folks will say when I do have the surgery and start to lose weight and I wonder how long I plan to keep the band my secret. Did any of you find you didnt mind talking about it after the fact???

I tell anyone and everyone... what matters to me is that the word gets out that there is an alternative to WLS with decreased risks. I feel that many people are afraid of the drastic nature of the GBP and are really not aware that there is another option. The band is a wonderful tool... I want the whole world to know about it!

Gail started a great thread last year called "My Secret Lapband"; because of the revived interest in the topic on this thread, I've bumped it. You can read a range of experiences from totally open to virtually secret: http://lapbandtalk.com/showthread.php?p=50136&posted=1#post50136