so thanksgiving went great. i stuck to my plan, didnt overeat, noone seemed to notice that i wasnt eating (noone knows i had this). at times i had to walk away/out of kitchen/dining area because it was hard. i am proud of myself.

so then why do i feel so crappy and blue today? today all i seem to be thinkin about was this or that food that i didnt eat yesterday. today i feel huge and fat and bloaty and just want to cry. i should be rejoicing that i made it through my first holiday meal(s) and did great.

its all i can do to not bawl my eyes out typing this! i dont even know what i am looking for in coming here. maybe i just need to vent? but i want feedback???

sorry to just ramble on like this. lets hope tomorrow is a better day. :faint:

This is a struggle on many fronts. We were overweight for a number of reasons, certainly some of them non-physical. Food played certain roles in or lives, even more so around the holidays. Your life has changed. Even though it is for the better, change is hard. We can mourn what we have lost, even if we are aiming to lose it. You did what you needed to do for your healthy body. It may take your mind a little longer to readjust!

Holidays are hard on many people. You are perfectly normal. Just hold on a bit longer, and this too shall pass.

This was y first T/giving since being banded too. You did good by sticking to your eating plan. I had to bail out before desert came out even though I never eat pie, it looked so good. Be happy with the self control you had and keep looking forward.

umm i actually cried about food yesterday ahahah

lame huh?

but yea i did.. i was hungry and couldnt put nothing down..

i feel like a jack lmao

This is a struggle on many fronts. We were overweight for a number of reasons, certainly some of them non-physical. food played certain roles in or lives, even more so around the holidays. Your life has changed. Even though it is for the better, change is hard. We can mourn what we have lost, even if we are aiming to lose it. You did what you needed to do for your healthy body. It may take your mind a little longer to readjust!

Excellent advice Trystelle! Having been banded right around the holidays, I didn't even think about these feelings that are bound to pop up. You have to admit that these holidays are all about food and family. Probably in that order :biggrin1:. Thank you for your well-placed advice.

I am so there with you. I had a free Thanksgiving dinner and could have had TONS, but all I got was maybe 15 tiny bites total. You better believe that for the rest of the day and all the next day I was OBSESSING over how good that stuff tasted and how much it sucked that I hadn't been able to have more. But I made it through. Food has been a longtime friend of mine (well...not much of a friend...more like an ENEMY!). It's hard saying goodbye to a parasitic relationship like that sometimes. On the surface it seems like a good relationship, but really what it comes down to is that I was being hurt by it. I have to keep reminding myself of that. Food (the bad stuff) is no friend of mine! I want to eat to live, not live to eat. My first Thanksgiving banded and I hope it's a sign of things to come that I was able to control myself! You deserve a huge pat on the back for getting past it. Give yourself a couple of days...things will come into perspective.

You are absolutely mourning the loss of your ''friend" and it's normal.

I have to be honest, my nutritionist was really good with this. She said that food is a part of celebration and life. She said on Thansgiving, I should eat. I should eat a small amount of anything I like and that's what I did. I didn't eat very much but I had a bite of everything that looked good - including dessert. She suggested that I just take it easy and up my exercise for a few days after which I did, and for the first time in 39 years I did not gain one ounce Thansgiving week. Not one! And I don't feel deprived in any way because I ate what I wanted. This is how normal people eat and it's why they aren't fat.

Don't beat yourself up if you "cheat", it's not cheating if you have a bite and move on. If you make a mistake, get back on track and the "mistake weight" will come right off again.

You can do this! You've done great so far and you'll continue to do so. Hang in there...

I know how you feel. My sister in law asked why I decided to have this done during the holidays. I told her, I have had 40 plus years of eating with wild abandon during the holiday season and now it is time for me to take control. Plus, is there any good time during the year to change everything about the way you eat and live? No, you just have to do it!

Unless I am hit by a bus or something really unexpected takes me out of this world, there will be many more holidays in my future where I can eat more than I did this time. But, if I continue on the road I have been on for 10+ years, eating every damn thing in sight, then maybe there won't be many more holidays in my future.... Diabetes, Heart Disease, HyperTension, High Cholesterol, Cancer...

Take heart, food needs to become our friend, so during the holidays to come, we can have a taste of everything, but with moderation and appreciation, instead of gluttony and obsession.

You are newly banded and are still healing and still 'grieving' the change in lifestyle......very normal. And I'm guessing you haven't had a fill yet....or if you have it's not to the point of giving you restriction. So, yes, a table full of food is going to be hard to resist.....just like before surgery. But if you get a fill or two before Christmas it will be easier hopefully and your clothes will start to loosen up and you'll see a whole new world opening up to you. I cried, too, and sometimes I still do after a year and a half.....but I cry when I think back on the terrible, life-threatening condition I allowed my life and health get into and all the living I lost out on before I found a way to get control. I don't cry about the food.....it doesn't matter to me any more. It does get easier, sweetie.

i just wanted to tell everyone thank you for your kind responses. i am surprised at how up and down i have been, even over the weekend. i am trying to get into a better mindset to start this week fresh today! i am still amazed at how much of a head game this all has been. i thought i was prepared and ready for such a huge life change. i mean, i am ready/was ready, and am so incredibly glad i had this done. there are definately things that are much harder then i thought they would be. but i am just gonna take each day and it will get better! thanks again!

want so bad,

That is the best advice. Take one day at a time.

Just to add to all the fantastic advice above:

As I see it there are three parts to this lapband thing. There's the physical surgery, there's the behavior modification and there's the reframing how you deal with food.

You got the band, you behaved in a way that supports the choices you want but the reframing stuff took you by surprise!

There are lots of emotional ups and downs with the band, well with life...but looking at food in a different light doesn't happen automatically when you get the band. It takes sucky lessons like crying after Thanksgiving to help change that perspective. It's all part of the process.