Tomorrow will be five weeks post op and tomorrow will also be my husband’s 9th angel day. He was 40 when he passed away. We had just had our third daughter, who was 3 weeks old. It’s the first time I’ve mourned his death with no comfort food, and I believe it’ll be my first weigh in where I haven’t lost a single ounce. I knew that I gained my weight due to my loss and my new found habit of emotional eating, but I guess I didn’t realize how the true emotions must have been masked with food as I seem to be more grief struck than I have been in quite sometime. I seem to be constipated with the increase of protein. I noticed I seem to be grazing higher fat foods the past few days and am pissed at myself for not stopping this behavior sooner! I’m scared this means I’m going to fail. I want to pick myself up, shake off, and kick tomorrow in the teeth!
I guess I just needed to vent ? #wordvomit

I'm saddened to hear about such a tender anniversary, especially so soon after surgery. That must be hard for you. I don't think you're going to fail, you realize your bad habits and so you can correct them! Can you get the higher-fat foods out of your house so they're not a temptation?

@sassysleever76, I'm so sorry for your loss and understand where you are coming from. I lost my fiancé (he was 2 weeks shy of turning 38) 13 years ago and for some reason the 9th anniversary of his death was one of the hardest for me. Try to turn your attention to something positive. You're on a new journey and think about how happy your husband will be for you to know that you are taking care of yourself and making positive choices. When you start to feel blue, go for a walk, go to the gym and work out the sadness and change those sad hormones to positive and happy endorphins. As for the constipation, my suggestion is a little Milk of Magnesia daily or find a way to increase your fiber, I've become a fan of ground flaxseed and yogurt daily. You've realized your error, now is the time to take control of your actions and put a stop. You haven't done any damage to yourself, you have this and you will succeed. Remember, stalls do happen and sometimes they last, but don't focus on that, focus on the positive changes you have made to yourself and your new lifestyle.

Mourn anyway you feel like , then celebrate his life and yours, again.