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Adjusting to my new life
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Orchids&Dragons 2 posts
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sillykitty 1 post
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Tracy1978 1 post
Today I am 45 days out. I take my vitamins daily, get my fluids in with no problem and am tolerating food very well. I almost feel like I'm doing too well...reading some of the things on here have me perplexed. I have to remind myself that everyone is different, everyone heals differently.
I'm down 38 pounds. Whenever I get the thought in my mind that I am not progressing fast enough I remind myself that this is the most weight I have lost in ages. I continue to gain and lose the same five pounds, then it finally falls off. Then I plateau and gain/lose the next 5 pounds. Like I said, its frustrating me to no end, but I am trying to be realistic with myself. Slow and steady wins the race, and I am giving my skin time to adjust to the loss as well.
Observations and Weird sensations:
Sometimes I can barely finish a yogurt while other times I can eat quite a bit more. (For example, a bean burrito from taco bell or a 6 inch sub on flatbread from Subway)
I can feel the food shift in my stomach; I've never had that sensation before.
Sadly, the sleeve doesn't get rid of PMS cravings. I still have to fight myself about eating crap. The difference is now I can talk myself out of it 95% of the time whereas before I was 95% sure I would eat it anyway.
Since I am not consistently on sugar/carbs like I used to be I can actually feel myself crash from eating something carb/sugar rich. It's enough to make me not want to eat them.
I've found if I've eaten a few bites too much, I can get rid of that feeling much faster by walking. Walking actually helps move my food. Before surgery, walking while I was stuffed was sheer torture. If I was overly full, I would feel that way for a long time. a couple hours even, before I would get any relief,
I definitely feel restriction. I eat maybe a 1/4 to an 1/8 of what I used to.
I can't throw up. I've had the sensation a few times and even tried to on one occasion that I overdid it by accident. I didn't feel the restriction til it was too late. I've since learned to slow down when I eat so I have time for my body to signal to me. But the point is, I used to be able to puke almost on command. Not so much anymore.
Its not really worth going out to eat at a sit down restaurant. I cant eat like the rest of the folks. While that is a exhilarating feeling, I found myself sulking because I couldn't eat my favorite meal at Chuy's. I had to laugh at myself like really, Tracy? You have wanted to be thinner for years and now that you have the chance you are crying about a chimichanga?
I still have to silence my inner fat kid on the daily. I'm hoping that becomes less and less. I didn't realize just how addicted i was to food and food routines. I'm slowly re-learning how to have fun without food or booze and how to incorporate exercise into daily life again.