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Lack of motivation



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I got sleeved 9/1/2016 and lost close to 100lbs so far. I eat right and worked out, but it I feel like blah. I been at this working out and eating right for a 1yr and a half and don't feel I'm losing weight. I'm still fat and I feel this surgery was a waste.

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If you feel it was a waste why so? What were your expectations of getting WLS?

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12 minutes ago, orionburn said:

If you feel it was a waste why so? What were your expectations of getting WLS?

I figured it would change my mind in life. Like make me work out more, eat better, and just be more active in life. I did (and doing) all that, but I still feel the same way as before.

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I don't think it was the surgery. I had my surgery 10/2017 and it did not magicly make me motivated to work out or eat better or be more active.

How would removing 80% of my stomach accomplish those things? The only things the surgery has done is curbed the cravings and stopped me from over eating which is pretty much as advertised.

To help with motivation, I suggest a support group. My insurance made me go to two meetings and I am glad they did. That was a year ago and I still attend!

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27 minutes ago, Donnijeep said:

I figured it would change my mind in life. Like make me work out more, eat better, and just be more active in life. I did (and doing) all that, but I still feel the same way as before.

Despite WLS being a major surgery it's still just a tool for weight loss in the end. It's how you use it that matters. We could all invest in the best exercise equipment to have at home, but if we never go down to the basement to use it that isn't the equipment's fault. That's on us. Just like head hunger. My stomach is 80% the size of what it used to be but I can eat something at work, get home and hour later and feel like I'm starving because of old habits of eating as soon as I got home whether I was hungry or not. The surgery isn't to blame for that. It's much more of a mental game then a lot of us thought it would be.

Now, if what you're experiencing is something akin to body dysmorphia that's a different story. For me I've lost about 120lbs since I started my WLS journey. That said I still feel like I have the same body shape as I did when I weighed 350lbs. Sure, there's a lot less of it, but if I'm having a day where I feel bloated then I feel the same towards my body now as I did then.

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It sounds like you've had good luck with the surgery (100 lbs lost). I think that you may want to also look at other things in your life. Speaking from experience being thin doesn't bring happiness by itself. Sure it feels better and life is easier, but you need a lot more to be happy. You could be depressed or have other things going on, it might be a good idea to talk with someone, there may be things you can do that can help you feel much better.

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1 minute ago, Losebig said:

It sounds like you've had good luck with the surgery (100 lbs lost). I think that you may want to also look at other things in your life. Speaking from experience being thin doesn't bring happiness by itself. Sure it feels better and life is easier, but you need a lot more to be happy. You could be depressed or have other things going on, it might be a good idea to talk with someone, there may be things you can do that can help you feel much better.

That is exactly how I feel. I have done good work, but I don't feel it, so I don't feel like the motivation is there because I still feel like the "same me". I was very depressed before the surgery, and now I just do things just do it because I feel it's going to help me keep going, but some days I don't think it's worth it.

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1 hour ago, Donnijeep said:

That is exactly how I feel. I have done good work, but I don't feel it, so I don't feel like the motivation is there because I still feel like the "same me". I was very depressed before the surgery, and now I just do things just do it because I feel it's going to help me keep going, but some days I don't think it's worth it.

I felt the same way when I completed my masters degree (I know not WLS related )

The accomplishment felt Sooooooo empty. I think it had something to do with my believing it would magically make me happy when I reached 5he goal. I forgot to enjoy life along the way. WLS and weight loss cannot be your only goal in life (or a degree ) it HAS to be the tool to help you achieve all of your life goals. Otherwise once it's achieved and you stop to assess you may not have anything else.

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I lost about 150# post sleeve. I still felt fat, I felt like I looked old (hadn't seen my real face in decades, so it was a shocker). It took awhile, counseling, supportive friends etc for me to realize that I am finally pretty normal. Our brains aren't sleeved, sometimes you have to find other ways to help with that part of this whole deal!

Some people find support groups helpful. I did counseling - and started living life to the fullest and my brain slowly slowly changed. Now I think I look pretty damn good. :)

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3 hours ago, Donnijeep said:

That is exactly how I feel. I have done good work, but I don't feel it, so I don't feel like the motivation is there because I still feel like the "same me". I was very depressed before the surgery, and now I just do things just do it because I feel it's going to help me keep going, but some days I don't think it's worth it.

Have you thought about shifting your mindset? Instead of determining the success of your workouts by the weight you lose, focus on becoming stronger or faster. I now set quarterly gym goals and while weight loss and maintaining is still very important to me, my focus lies on improving my health in other ways now. This helps to keep me motivated and less down on myself when the scale is moving slow or not at all.

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15 minutes ago, MowryRocks said:

Have you thought about shifting your mindset? Instead of determining the success of your workouts by the weight you lose, focus on becoming stronger or faster. I now set quarterly gym goals and while weight loss and maintaining is still very important to me, my focus lies on improving my health in other ways now. This helps to keep me motivated and less down on myself when the scale is moving slow or not at all.

I am up to try something new to get me out of this mindset because the pressure of trying to keep up is killing me. My whole life I dreamt to be thin and fit. I get my chance and I feel like I blew it. I see others 1.5 or 2 years after their surgeries, are thin & fit.

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You have mention your weight loss, however Did you not improve in other areas ie; blood pressure, cholesterol? Have you considered linking back up with the head wizard? I tossed my high blood pressure medicine and just received my first look at my cholesterol post surgery and my numbers were impressive from 213 to 153 less than 90 days after surgery, these are the factors I feel are just as important than just focusing on purely weight loss, as we all have different perspectives our experiences are widely different from one another.

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15 minutes ago, Sammy 10-30 said:

You have mention your weight loss, however Did you not improve in other areas ie; blood pressure, cholesterol? Have you considered linking back up with the head wizard? I tossed my high blood pressure medicine and just received my first look at my cholesterol post surgery and my numbers were impressive from 213 to 153 less than 90 days after surgery, these are the factors I feel are just as important than just focusing on purely weight loss, as we all have different perspectives our experiences are widely different from one another.

Yes, all the other areas are good, except my Vitamin D, which were extremely low. I stop taking my Vitamin D pills, but I need start again. My stuff just could be that.

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Vitamin D is a always a challenge and exemplifies the importance of our commitment taking our Vitamins , and here are just some symptoms that derive from this deficiency; note the fatigue and tiredness or depression. I am not saying this your issue, just pointing out some conditions that follow Vitamin D deficiencies.

Here are 8 signs and symptoms of vitamin D deficiency.
  • Getting Sick or Infected Often. ...
  • Fatigue and Tiredness. ...
  • Bone and Back Pain. ...
  • Depression. ...
  • Impaired Wound Healing. ...
  • Bone Loss. ...
  • Hair loss. ...
  • Muscle Pain.

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1 minute ago, Sammy 10-30 said:

Vitamin D is a always a challenge and exemplifies the importance of our commitment taking our Vitamins , and here are just some symptoms that derive from this deficiency; note the fatigue and tiredness or depression. I am not saying this your issue, just pointing out some conditions that follow Vitamin D deficiencies.

Here are 8 signs and symptoms of Vitamin D deficiency.
  • Getting Sick or Infected Often. ...
  • Fatigue and Tiredness. ...
  • Bone and Back Pain. ...
  • Depression. ...
  • Impaired Wound Healing. ...
  • Bone Loss. ...
  • hair Loss. ...
  • Muscle Pain.

I think the Depression is the issue, hence why I was so low.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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