So my surgery is in 2 days. I have not followed my 2 week required Optimist diet at all other than today. I feel like a complete failure and am now thinking about canceling my surgery completely. I've researched this surgery for 2 years, my whole family has had it and been successful. I figured I could be too! It seems though like I've completely sabotaged myself. Even if I manage to not cheat Christmas eve and christmas, I still feel I don't deserve this surgery anymore. I don't want to put my health at more of a risk, thats what this surgery is meant to help me fix...However, I just feel hopeless. I thought this is what I wanted, I was so excited yet my obsession with food seems to be overpowering me.

Sounds like you may need to step back and at least delay until you cam decide if this is really for you...maybe some additional counselling.

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Think of all the reasons you were going to do it. Maybe talk to the surgeon they may not mind. The surgery makes shakes and everything else easier. Don't stop now!

It sounds like you're about to sabotage yourself again. What if, this time, you broke that pattern & achieved a different result?

No one deserves to be obese either. Self-examination is in order but beating up on yourself is not the answer, that is part of the issue. Call your surgeon and explain how hard it was and ask if you can start NOW on the optifast and reschedule the surgery. Take action, not reaction.

I can totally relate. I was supposed to get sleeved on December 18th but I never followed my pre-op diet and mostly that was because I didn't get my approval until 1 week before the surgery. I felt like...why should I follow a pre-op diet if my insurance is just going to decline me? I wasn't mentally prepared, so I didn't cancel my insurance but moved it to March 18th. This gives me plenty of time to go through with the surgery, eat properly, change my diet and do things the right way. Maybe you should do the same thing? I wanted to do it in February but my job asked me to wait until March, possibly spring break (I work for a University) when things aren't so hectic.