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Dates that don't revolve around food



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3 hours ago, jlindenman said:

It is amazing how many women cannot even bother to reply to a message even if they are not intetested. It takes a minute to say thank you but I am not intetested. They ate just plain ignorant. They should honored that someone took the time to message them, I know I am when I get a message.

When you reply you aren't interested they either tell you off or argue with you. It is safer to just not respond.

I told several guys I wasn't interested because they had small children and they tried to convince me it wouldn't be an issue. I don't even want to date a dude with a cat let alone a kid. Not interested. Nothing wrong with it but "It's a no from me, dawg".

I met a dude for coffee over a year ago, told him I wasn't interested and he is still randomly calling and text me from different numbers.

It is better to say nothing and block them than take the chance on gaining their wrath. Men have no idea how dangerous dating is for women.

Edited by OutsideMatchInside

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When you reply you aren't interested they either tell you off or argue with you. It is safer to just not respond.
I told several guys I wasn't interested because they had small children and they tried to convince me it wouldn't be an issue. I don't even want to date a dude with a cat let alone a kid. Not interested. Nothing wrong with it but "It's a no from me, dawg".
I met a dude for coffee over a year ago, told him I wasn't interested and he is still randomly calling and text me from different numbers.
It is better to say nothing and block them than take the chance on gaining their wrath. Men have no idea how dangerous dating is for women.

I agree with jlindeman. I would rather get a thanks, but no thanks than nothing at all. I don't even care if they don't give a reason. Not responding when someone puts themselves out there and takes a chance is just rude and insulting. I try to respond to each message, but then if i tell them no and they pull that "I'll change your mind" crap, then I'll ignore them. If they keep it up, then I'll block them. I also rarely give my phone number out. I'll chat through an app instead. Either through the dating site itself or through kik or viber or something like that. It's a lot safer then giving out your phone number to someone you don't know.

But getting back to the original topic... I loved the idea of going to a shooting range. I would never have thought of something like that. It sounds like fun. I wish there was a zoo close to here (closest one is 2 hours away) because that would be fun too. But for a first date, at least around here, karaoke or coffee/tea are about the only safe meetings that I can think of. Crystal bridges (our museum), though, could be another option. It's not too far away. Unfortunately, not knowing the town or surrounding areas of the op or others, it's really hard to suggest specific non food dates. I think there's been a lot of great suggestions though, depending on the areas people live in.

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I'm not talking about going out and meeting someone. I'm talking about when someone sends you a message and the only thing you have to do is reply thank you but I'm not intetested. That's all. It's not hard. It has nothing to do with not knowing how hard it is for women on dating sites. I would think that if it were a guy that was going to do so me to you, he would only get more angry if you ignore him. That is not a normal reaction from most men. They just want to be acknowledged for taking the time to reach out to a woman. Now if his message is inappropriate in any way, by all me and you should ignore him and block him. You are not aware of what men have to go through on here with all these women with six different profile, all with the same picture but a different name and location. They get to know you and then they try to get money from you. I get messages from these scammers at least 10 times a day. That really sycks. They really break your heart.

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I know their are lots of scammers but I have been at this off and on for a while.

I'm not willing to get cussed out and called all kinds of names for saying no, thank you. I tried responding to everyone saying no and it was horrible. You might appreciate a polite no thank you but most men don't. You go from beautiful to ugly and stuck up in 5 seconds. Also 90% of the messages are "hey beautiful", "you are pretty", those don't even deserve a response. Those are random compliments, and they flood my inbox so much its hard to even find the legit messages. If they actually say something that means they read my profile I respond because at least those guys are witty.

That is why I switched to Tinder only. The only guys that can message me are ones I am interested in and I respond to each one. I will never use another online site where just anyone can message me ever again. You get way too many messages also that way. I could never keep up. My phone would die in an hour and I'd have to keep it on the charger and sometimes switch to the wired charger because the wireless could keep up.

I don't give out my real number I have a couple virtual numbers. My Google number I use for other stuff and I made the mistake of giving it to that guy. He still randomly texts that number from various fake numbers even though I clearly told him I was not interested and exactly why, right after we met for coffee (he was late, he asked to meet for coffee during dinner hours, he didn't even offer to buy me a bottle of Water, I had my own coffee because he was late getting there, then he sat in a coffee shop didn't order anything like it isn't a place of business).

Everyone has a different online dating experience. It has been very positive for me. Just because someone doesn't behave how you expected doesn't mean they are being malicious. And even if they are being malicious that is their problem not yours, normal well adjusted people don't strive to hurt other people's feelings.

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On 5/17/2017 at 11:33 AM, bellabloom said:

Kinda sucks how the OPs post got hijacked.


No, I'm totally digging the discussion. Carry on. :)

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In that case, I received a like from a woman, so I emailed her even though she is a Packers fan, and she just ignored me. Is this some sort of game?

A lot of guys send "Hey beautiful" messages because they get ignored so much. I'm past the point of thoroughly reading profiles and coming up with thoughtful messages just to be ignored.

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I feel your pain. I hate these dating sites but what can I do. I am so lonely and just want someone to love and to love me back and to be able to start doing fun things together. Apparently that is too much to ask for. Am I that repulsive? Lol

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2 minutes ago, jlindenman said:

I feel your pain. I hate these dating sites but what can I do. I am so lonely and just want someone to love and to love me back and to be able to start doing fun things together. Apparently that is too much to ask for. Am I that repulsive? Lol

I got a cat so I'm good. Ironically my dates with the cat revolve around food. He only seems to come out of the woodwork when I have food.

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I got a cat so I'm good. Ironically my dates with the cat revolve around food. He only seems to come out of the woodwork when I have food.

That's a cat for you. Try living with 6 of them, 7 if you include my daughter (her nickname is Kat) lol! It seems even my daughter does that... only comes out when there's food involved. (She's almost 13) Lol.

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2 hours ago, sgc said:

In that case, I received a like from a woman, so I emailed her even though she is a Packers fan, and she just ignored me. Is this some sort of game?

A lot of guys send "Hey beautiful" messages because they get ignored so much. I'm past the point of thoroughly reading profiles and coming up with thoughtful messages just to be ignored.

Dude, don't date a packers fan. You are better than that.

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I've never really dated anyone (I'm kind of awkward and out in SoCal I just kind of have always been the funny fat girl) but I do go out and hang with my friends in non food situations!!! What about an outside activity like the beach or hiking, or like museums or aquariums? Or even like a theatre play? Those are always fun c:

SW: 328
CW: 261
GW: 150
Surgery date: January 12, 2017

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That's a cat for you. Try living with 6 of them, 7 if you include my daughter (her nickname is Kat) lol! It seems even my daughter does that... only comes out when there's food involved. (She's almost 13) Lol.

Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G935A using BariatricPal mobile app


I'm currently courting a dog behind his back. The pet adoption place is the only place that returns my emails.

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Dude, don't date a packers fan. You are better than that.

It was one of my weaker moments. I was desperate.

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Maybe not a first date but more like a third date....escape room. I flippin love escape rooms. It is a problem solving situation and it can really show a lot about how a person thinks and how they work under pressure.

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I didn't know those really existed. I've only seen them in movies. I know they aren't around here. Maybe Tulsa or OKC has them. Neat idea though.


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