This is an open forum where we should be able to express our goals, accomplishments, and failures. Berating someone because of what they ate is extremely unhelpful. Instead we should try not to judge. Not one of you is perfect or you wouldn't be here in the first place.

There is a lot of negative criticism on this forum. Some people believe it is necessary, but I do not. It seems like numerous users need a lesson in constructive criticism.

I am a debater and have been for years so I have "tough skin" when it comes to the back-and-forth arguments, but this site brings it to a whole new level. One of my very first posts, before I knew what the environment was, garnered a lot of criticism and then a post was made about it on rants & raves. It wouldn't have been a big deal, but I was told I would fail for advancing my diet too quickly *even though my surgeon approved*. It seems like some of the users here just want to fight for the purpose of fighting.

2 hours ago, CrowMilk said:

There is a lot of negative criticism on this forum. Some people believe it is necessary, but I do not. It seems like numerous users need a lesson in constructive criticism.

I am a debater and have been for years so I have "tough skin" when it comes to the back-and-forth arguments, but this site brings it to a whole new level. One of my very first posts, before I knew what the environment was, garnered a lot of criticism and then a post was made about it on rants & raves. It wouldn't have been a big deal, but I was told I would fail for advancing my diet too quickly *even though my surgeon approved*. It seems like some of the users here just want to fight for the purpose of fighting.

Actually I just read the thread you talked about:

And the criticism levied was directly related to the health risks others (and later you) were taking, and that other posters were deliberately being "rebellious" at merely a few days out of surgery. Not smart whatsoever.

The logic used by those giving criticism was justified, such the many users, "those doing research", coming across that topic and thinking that just trying new things a few days out is something worth the increased risk of complications.

Then of course, @OutsideMatchInsidemic-dropped with the comment about people claiming to want discussion tend to want it instead to be an echo chamber of "yes men". They understand that others use this site for information, as I did before I joined, and someone could mistake this sort of thing for useful information at a critical stage where the risks to one's health is at its highest. Part of discussion is acknowledging that putting forth your opinions and actions can result in criticism. If one only wants affirming opinions, anywhere online is a terrible place for it.

That is the perfect example of a completely civilized conversation blown of proportion by someone in their feelings probably from hormone dumping. It was a very normal conversation that simply had disagreeing opinions. Yet it is viewed as negative.

People forget that we are all different ages, different cultures, and different education levels. Something that is offensive to someone else will be mild to non offense to other people.

If you can't take disagreeing with people online, try these real life support groups. They are far more brutal than BP or any other WLS site.

9 hours ago, OutsideMatchInside said:

That is the perfect example of a completely civilized conversation blown of proportion by someone in their feelings probably from hormone dumping. It was a very normal conversation that simply had disagreeing opinions. Yet it is viewed as negative.

People forget that we are all different ages, different cultures, and different education levels. Something that is offensive to someone else will be mild to non offense to other people.

If you can't take disagreeing with people online, try these real life support groups. They are far more brutal than BP or any other WLS site.

Hi OutsideMatchInside,

Would you mind explaining what hormone dumping is? My surgeon warned us that I'd be an SOB post-surgery and my patience and temper are definitely thinner at any rate. Curious if what you are referring to is related to gherlin issues?

Thanks for any and all info!

Actually I just read the thread you talked about:


And the criticism levied was directly related to the health risks others (and later you) were taking, and that other posters were deliberately being "rebellious" at merely a few days out of surgery. Not smart whatsoever.
The logic used by those giving criticism was justified, such the many users, "those doing research", coming across that topic and thinking that just trying new things a few days out is something worth the increased risk of complications.
Then of course, [mention=255228]OutsideMatchInside[/mention]mic-dropped with the comment about people claiming to want discussion tend to want it instead to be an echo chamber of "yes men". They understand that others use this site for information, as I did before I joined, and someone could mistake this sort of thing for useful information at a critical stage where the risks to one's health is at its highest. Part of discussion is acknowledging that putting forth your opinions and actions can result in criticism. If one only wants affirming opinions, anywhere online is a terrible place for it.

That's why I said that the original thread wasn't a big deal at all. It was my bad for posting about what my own surgeon said I could do and what my own thoughts were. It wasn't an issue until later threads popped up and users "dissed" others for those opinions. If someone says something that is wrong, then absolutely the statement must be corrected, but there is zero justification for furthering that discussion elsewhere to point fingers at those who did not know better.

:lol:

That is the perfect example of a completely civilized conversation blown of proportion by someone in their feelings probably from hormone dumping. It was a very normal conversation that simply had disagreeing opinions. Yet it is viewed as negative.
People forget that we are all different ages, different cultures, and different education levels. Something that is offensive to someone else will be mild to non offense to other people.
If you can't take disagreeing with people online, try these real life support groups. They are far more brutal than BP or any other WLS site.

Like I said above, I didn't think the original thread was offensive or a big deal; it was the subsequent threads created by users to point fingers and marvel at others. That is what I have a problem with.

11 minutes ago, MzCoffee said:

Hi OutsideMatchInside,

Would you mind explaining what hormone dumping is? My surgeon warned us that I'd be an SOB post-surgery and my patience and temper are definitely thinner at any rate. Curious if what you are referring to is related to gherlin issues?

Thanks for any and all info!

Fat stores estrogen. When you burn fat, estrogen is released into you body, this happens to men and women. The floods of estrogen can cause mood swings, increased periods. heavy periods. spotting between periods, periods in women that were menopausal, skin break outs lots of things. The mood swings can be insane. It is like PMSing for months on end.

Fat stores estrogen. When you burn fat, estrogen is released into you body, this happens to men and women. The floods of estrogen can cause mood swings, increased periods. heavy periods. spotting between periods, periods in women that were menopausal, skin break outs lots of things. The mood swings can be insane. It is like PMSing for months on end.

Haha, ain't that the truth.

On 4/14/2017 at 8:48 AM, jfcajr said:

This is an open forum where we should be able to express our goals, accomplishments, and failures. Berating someone because of what they ate is extremely unhelpful. Instead we should try not to judge. Not one of you is perfect or you wouldn't be here in the first place.

I agree with you!!! I was a bit put off from the other persons entire side of the conversation. I mean, as if we all haven't had our share of people belittling and berating us for our choices before surgery???

By the way... I saw a pair of Peeps slippers while at CVS the other day...I tried to teleport them to you...?

Edited April 24, 20179 yr by Mrs.W

52 minutes ago, OutsideMatchInside said:

Fat stores estrogen. When you burn fat, estrogen is released into you body, this happens to men and women. The floods of estrogen can cause mood swings, increased periods. heavy periods. spotting between periods, periods in women that were menopausal, skin break outs lots of things. The mood swings can be insane. It is like PMSing for months on end.

Ay yi yi - ok yes that all makes sense & I'll brace myself & others in my household as well! Thanks for responding!

2 hours ago, MzCoffee said:

Ay yi yi - ok yes that all makes sense & I'll brace myself & others in my household as well! Thanks for responding!

How long after surgery does this tend to start?

I agreed with him that his criticism was constructive, and wasn't berating. How you got I agreed with him that "someone isnt worthy".. no idea, but that's hilarious. Thank you for that.

What you should be questioning is why OP made this thread. It has nothing to do with WLS, it's instead whining about posters putting out negative opinions regarding his food choices that he posts in the open for people to respond to.

You are clueless. I made this thread because I've read a lot of negative feedback from people on other people's posts, not just my own. There's a bunch of trolls on here and you're one of them. Get some therapy because you and others like you are angry and judgmental and have no right to be. Are you so perfect? Don't bother denying it because if you were you wouldn't be on a weight loss surgery app.