I am pre-surgery and thought this question would be best suited for this group.

The only person I have told and will tell about getting WLS is my husband. Its just what's best for me. I do have friends and family who love to sit around the dinner table to eat and chat. When family visits, where to eat is always topic #1. We have sunday breakfast with my FIL twice a month. What do I tell other people when i cant eat "normally" pre/post op? I will not skip these times with family as it would do more harm than good, so im looking for a good way to explain my new eating habits in a way that woll not draw more questions.

Anyone have any experience in this?

You can say you're trying to lose weight/changing your eating habits without mentioning the surgery.

54 minutes ago, bostonmama said:

You can say you're trying to lose weight/changing your eating habits without mentioning the surgery.

Ha. Its funny how the most simple idea makes the most sense. I overthink. Thanks!

The more support you have threw this journey the better. Surgery is not the easy way out. It is a lot of hard work. My family likes to gossip and I know if I didn't tell them I was having the surgery they would gossip I'm on drugs and that would be worst. I wish you the best of luck.

I had the same concerns. Turns out I am 5 months post op, have lost 60 lbs and not one person has suspected. Maybe because I'm always on a diet, maybe because I've lost and gained weight so much in my life, maybe because I'm losing rather slowly, maybe because people are less concerned or preoccupied with us than we think. I'm not sure. But this turned. Out to be a non issue for me. The hardest was the first few weeks when I just avoided eating with others.


Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I only told 2 people, everyone else knows I've been working on losing weight so they don't really suspect anything. When I've ate with them I eat very little or mentioned that I just had one of my shakes and am not that hungry.

HW 493lbs 3/2/16
SW 416lbs 1/10/17
CW 411lbs

The only person who permanently complained about my surgery of the folks who know (which is nearly everyone) is ironically my mother in law. And the only reason she complained was over us visiting for vacation and my dietary restrictions. She was to put it mildly livid that all the cooking rules for me had to change. And no, I wasn't allowed to cook for myself. She said I should not have had the surgery and mess up the way she does things. She didn't want me getting in my required fluids either, being attached to a glass of water or juice was too much for her OCD self. Eventually it became too much with everything else going on and she decided to stop speaking to us completely. Noone else has reacted so negatively to my surgery or weightloss. But it's not her life, it was a mutual choice my husband and I made together.

Sent from my SM-T350 using Tapatalk

Wow [emoji15] I'm so sorry

The more support you have threw this journey the better. Surgery is not the easy way out. It is a lot of hard work. My family likes to gossip and I know if I didn't tell them I was having the surgery they would gossip I'm on drugs and that would be worst. I wish you the best of luck.

I laughed so much and laughing still hurts! But that would be my family!

I am pre-surgery and thought this question would be best suited for this group.
The only person I have told and will tell about getting WLS is my husband. Its just what's best for me. I do have friends and family who love to sit around the dinner table to eat and chat. When family visits, where to eat is always topic #1. We have sunday Breakfast with my FIL twice a month. What do I tell other people when i cant eat "normally" pre/post op? I will not skip these times with family as it would do more harm than good, so im looking for a good way to explain my new eating habits in a way that woll not draw more questions.
Anyone have any experience in this?

I've told my friends I'm following a strict guide that my nutritionist is monitoring

Personally, I thought I would only tell close family and friends, but I started finding it was actually easier to just tell anyone who commented or asked. I know that won't work for everyone, but surprisingly, I haven't had a bad comment yet. Mostly people just notice my weight loss and say I'm looking great, and if they ask more questions, I tell them I had surgery. It's a hard process, and definitely nothing to be ashamed of!

I've told my friends I'm following a strict guide that my nutritionist is monitoring

That is what I am saying too. That my Dr has me seeing a NUT and I have to report to her.

Hilarious story. One week post op we invited friends to dinner. I made pulled pork, slaw, beans...the works. 7 guests that I served and socialized with for hours. The whole time I never put a morsel in my mouth and sipped on water. Nobody even noticed or asked.

Lesson to be learned. Most people don't notice except your closest friends. That was 4 weeks ago. Now I go to lunch with my friends, order soup and sip it slowly while we talk. Now that I have lost nearly 30 lbs, questions are coming. My response is that I'm making better choices and watching portions. That's its. No details. None needed.

I never make a big deal of it and I am really enjoying it. As I lose weight I feel very normal. It's been a while since I've felt normal.

I didn't want my surgery to become the topic of conversation every time someone who knew saw me.

Good luck

The only people that know is my hubby and my mom. My children don't even know. I will tell them a few days before my surgery date (March 20th) but I'm going to tell them I'm having my gallbladder removed. I don't want them telling the whole church and all there teachers, coaches and friends. Honestly I don't care what people think BUT I still don't want people all in my business. I can hear it now "You weren't even big"...... Yeah yeah yeah.

I've scheduled my"hernia" surgery next month. It is the truth but I've left out the rny. My weight loss is the key to being free of diabetes and high BP and easily explained with yet another diet/exercise program. Lol I love my cpap machine so much I cannot imagine wanting to quit using it...

I don't feel good about this!? We are food addicts and lying seems to be a way of having an excuse down the road to fail. Maybe not right away but at some point and that would be one of my own personal failures ever. Not to mention if something goes wrong your going to not just want people to know but your going to need them to know! I have been clear and upfront with everyone since I got my surgery in 2007 and it has helped me become clear and upfront with myself about food and my eating habits. Just maybe talk to your therapist about it and dr see what their thoughts are on it.
Honestly the sooner we quit caring what others think the sooner we can start living our truest best life.