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Boobs are a pain in the....
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I have been getting mammograms and ultrasounds on my breasts for the past ten years (sometimes twice per year). There are always cysts which are NOT masses so NOT cancer and I am fine with that. I have tested negative for both BRCA I and BRCA II. I have had one biopsy and yesterday I had an MRI.
Now, they are questioning the same spot they biopsied two years ago! I want to scream. I don't know if anyone of you have ever gone through this, but it is disruptive and upsetting all at once. Every time I get a call about my breasts I panic, even if it's only slightly. "What if this time they find something?" "What if they didn't catch something and I end up dying like my sister did?"
Way too many thoughts run through my head and I try so hard to just be calm and tell myself I'm not going to do anything until I get the results. But if I'm always getting results (because of so many freaking tests), I'm always on alert. I realize that it's nothing to joke about or fool around with, but there has to be some sort of end game, doesn't there?
I'm frustrated and I am thinking of just having a mastectomy. At least that will cut down on a lot of what I have to go through.
I'm only kidding, but still. It sounds good.