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Dating And The Perfect Body



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@nyseness.... Where are they now?... I believe when people are not emotional available they are always looking for the way out of the situation...

I see all kinds of people in relationships and all kinds of people being single...

A relationship that can't handle a fluctuating scale is one built on the superficial....

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

I'm not sure but not all men are the same. My BFF is a guy and trust me he will never date a plus size girl. We've been friends since high school and he has seen my weight fluctuate. Some ppl have their preference. I know I never dated anyone who was more than 200 lbs, even though I'm a big girl I just can't do it. I tend to gain the most weight after I have given birth.

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@@TammyL323 Its not all men! I have no perfect woman in mind personally! im not perfect either! I went from 472lbs to 243lbs and have some skin issues im not proud of but I don't let it stop me from living and having a good time doing it. if a guy doesn't like you only because of your body issue he isn't a good choice anyway! several woman that stared at me when I began my journey in the gym are now the very ones hitting on me. its not how you look that attracts me! its all personality! keep on smiling! the right guy is out there and will love you for you!

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@@TammyL323 Its not all men! I have no perfect woman in mind personally! im not perfect either! I went from 472lbs to 243lbs and have some skin issues im not proud of but I don't let it stop me from living and having a good time doing it. if a guy doesn't like you only because of your body issue he isn't a good choice anyway! several woman that stared at me when I began my journey in the gym are now the very ones hitting on me. its not how you look that attracts me! its all personality! keep on smiling! the right guy is out there and will love you for you!

I, sir, stand and applaud you. Not only for coming forward, but for being "real".

Congratulations on your success!!

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oh and im in new Orleans, if anyone of you are in town and need a date, hit me up! like I said, im not perfect but im awesome lol!!!

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@@TammyL323 Its not all men! I have no perfect woman in mind personally! im not perfect either! I went from 472lbs to 243lbs and have some skin issues im not proud of but I don't let it stop me from living and having a good time doing it. if a guy doesn't like you only because of your body issue he isn't a good choice anyway! several woman that stared at me when I began my journey in the gym are now the very ones hitting on me. its not how you look that attracts me! its all personality! keep on smiling! the right guy is out there and will love you for you!

I, sir, stand and applaud you. Not only for coming forward, but for being "real".

Congratulations on your success!!

thanks @@Andrea72 im brian by the way! no need to call me sir im only 42 haha. truth is, I don't like fake people much. we all live by certain standards but judging someone like us after the journey we have been on is just wrong! Im real,always will be!

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oh and im in new Orleans, if anyone of you are in town and need a date, hit me up! like I said, im not perfect but im awesome lol!!!

The only problem with NO is the lack of quality restaurants ;-). Still one of my favorite places to visit. Oh, BTW I'm not hitting you up for a date dude. I don't walk "that far" down Bourbon St.

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@@oldbriannomore

I couldn't agree more on the thought of fake people.

@@OKCPirate

When's the last time you were in NO? You don't have to walk "that far" anymore. Lol.

And might I add I am now craving a muffaletta from Central Grocery!!

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oh and im in new Orleans, if anyone of you are in town and need a date, hit me up! like I said, im not perfect but im awesome lol!!!

The only problem with NO is the lack of quality restaurants ;-). Still one of my favorite places to visit. Oh, BTW I'm not hitting you up for a date dude. I don't walk "that far" down Bourbon St.

oh and im in new Orleans, if anyone of you are in town and need a date, hit me up! like I said, im not perfect but im awesome lol!!!

The only problem with NO is the lack of quality restaurants ;-). Still one of my favorite places to visit. Oh, BTW I'm not hitting you up for a date dude. I don't walk "that far" down Bourbon St.

I guess I forgot to specify women only lol. I don't go to restaurants or bourbon street either. When your born and raised here its not that attractive lol..

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@@oldbriannomore

I couldn't agree more on the thought of fake people.

@@OKCPirate

When's the last time you were in NO? You don't have to walk "that far" anymore. Lol.

And might I add I am now craving a muffaletta from Central Grocery!!

I rang in New Year 2014, OU won the Sugar Bowl, and we wandered down to the "gay" part. And some things can't be unseen. The poor lady I was with was born and raised in a very small town in Oklahoma, and that was VERY new to her.

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New Orleans is a very cool place to visit.

Not sure I'd want to live there.

Char broiled oysters every afternoon and endless bars..........Lawd...I'd be in trouble.

The city that drinks like no other........

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@nyseness.... Where are they now?... I believe when people are not emotional available they are always looking for the way out of the situation...

I see all kinds of people in relationships and all kinds of people being single...

A relationship that can't handle a fluctuating scale is one built on the superficial....

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Not everyone is attracted to some one who is fat. 5, 10 even 20 pounds should be tolerable but yes I agree if a man is not attracted to a fat woman, yes that might be a deal breaker, I don't think that this is superficial just reality.

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I have good friends who live in NOLA. And younger relatives went to school there. It is definitely Party Central. There's a parade every weekend.

My friends and relatives who live there also walk their asses off (they all live a few blocks from Audubon Park). And they cook very, very healthy. Of course, they're foodies and eat out and cook with their friends and relatives who are chefs. Fortunately, they're all wine drinkers and probably don't have more than 1-2 glasses on days they drink.

But if you hung in the bars and drank spirits -- oh mah gawd, that would be hard on your liver.

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It is my personal experience that post massive weight loss, I thought I was not attractive enough to find a man who interests me. The last 3 plus years I learned that is not true. I am no beauty queen but being fit, clean, nice hair and skin, relatively youthful looking (all this for my age of course) puts me ahead of much of the "competition".

I think the reason I struggled with finding a great relationship was due to many things already mentioned but also because I wasn't clear in my own mind about some things and sent very mixed signals. I also went through times when I thought I was being too picky about looks (or whatever) but I just didn't feel the attraction when I tried to date someone who didn't appeal to me. I really prioritized what I want in a relationship and decided I'd rather be single then not get those things; that was important step forward. I didn't realize it at the time, but I have had some emotional growth and view things differently.

The day I admitted to myself that I want a boyfriend but the idea of marrying again gives me the heebie jeebbies was when things improved -I was just clearer in my own mind. I spent several months not dating and actually getting"ok" with the idea of being solo. I even made a list of new hobbies and interests to explore; but then I met my boyfriend and all THAT went out the window..LOL. I gladly give him a great deal of my time and focus these days. I don't expect we will be life partners but what a great time we are having!!!

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There is something definitely going on with the dating pool in the MA/CT area! I have a date Thursday with a guy who wanted to know if I would like to do a 5k with him this weekend. Ummm that would be a NO! I'll do the color run 5k trotting and walking because you end up a mess, and the Rugged Maniac 5k obstacle course because it was crazy fun with a large group...we redid some of the more fun obstacles. This dude is totally into fitness. I told him that my body was built for Comfort, not Speed! So dinner and drinks and conversation it is.

On Friday, I'm going out with Tattoo Guy to dinner and to see a friends band. (So far he's the one I'm most interested in) Then somehow/somewhere over the next week I'm trying to work in the three other guys that want to meet up. Have no idea what the heck is up...but you know what...I am going for it! I think that it's my willingness to just go out on the limb and have fun.

As I told my girlfriend who started me on this latest Quest...you aren't courting, you don't have to be intimate (I'm so old skool that I don't kiss on a first or second date...haven't kissed ANY of them), you don't have to marry them...just go out, have fun, be yourself.

I'm definitely learning more about myself!

As for the recovering alcoholic, a previous date, I decided that I can't do it. He was nice enough, but I just can't, and the attraction wasn't there for me.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 0 replies
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
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    • KimBaxleyWilson

      Three months and four days ago... I was in Costa Rica having a life changing surgery! Yesterday we had a followup visit with Dr. Esmeral via video chat and this morning my middle number changed.  I'm down 47lbs and two pants sizes. I can wear a Large tshirt for the first time in like... 14 years! Woot!! Everything is going great. I have zero regrets. I went down to the riverwalk with a friend and walked 2 miles on Monday without even getting fatigued. And no more snoring or chugging pickle juice for crazy leg cramps! I need to go to the gym more... I'm making new shirts next week so that will motivate me. LOL But I'm also just not as TIRED all the time! I have a LONG way to go...but seeing the progress on the scales and in the mirror is a huge motivator!! Thank you all for cheering me on and supporting me!!
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      https://alluniqueguide.com/java-burn-coffee-reviews/
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