And by change I mean our personalities ... our being in general ?

I know we're completely different on the outside ... but what does everyone think about the inside?

I'm just wondering ... because I'd like to think I'm still the same girl as before ... that I'll always be her ...

But I think others around me ( who haven't said anything ) think I'm changing in other ways besides physically ...

Just actions that I've noticed ...

Let me know what you guys think ... or have experienced ...

PS ... oopsy! spelled "lose" wrong! LOL ... guess I'm losing my marbles too!

Edited March 22, 201610 yr by MrsKarenC2008

I believe that we DON'T change at our core because that is set based on out morals, values and beliefs. However, there is a major change in my personality. Having been discriminated due to my size and appearance, I am more confident, hopeful, and while always happy, even more so.

Also, because my health is great, I have more energy, and am exponentially more active. Now, that said, I have new associates that I've met at the gym and at various activities, because my longtime friends are still inactive, like I used to be. However, I still love my friends and spend a lot of time with them. However, because I don't want to make a big deal over my weight loss, when they comment, I just say thanks and tell them how much healthier I feel. Even though I am excited to pieces over the weight loss, I don't call attention or make over the physical change because I am sensitive to their struggles.

Edited March 22, 201610 yr by sizesevenpp

I feel the same way as @sizesevenpp.

@MrsKarenC2008 - I do not think I have changed dramatically but I do feel more 'physical' in the sense that I am doing more and I feel more confident (really comfortable) doing more physical type things. WLS has been the best gift to myself. I want to enjoy the last 30-35 years I have left (I am 53).

well. I find that I am putting up with people treating me badly a lot less. in fact I am having to make myself wait to respond lest I overdo it.

Did I put up with more before this journey? are people trying to push me back in an unhealthy place because they are threatened by my weight loss? I don't know. Thankfully this for me, is a workplace issue and not my core relationships.

I don't know yet if I have changed or if they have.

Edited March 22, 201610 yr by Christinamo7

For me who I am overall hasn't changed but as I lose weight I have found that I am more confident and carry myself in a less invisible way if that makes sense.

I'm only 4 pounds from goal, and I feel that inside I'm the same person. I feel better, look better, but inside I still feel as I always have before. My internal conversations haven't changed.

What has changed remarkably though is the way I'm treated. Smiles from strangers are doled out more freely. Conversations are started out of the blue also, and in places I least expect them, like the grocery store. Twice now this past week I've had people in the check out line offer me their game pieces from the store's latest giveaway promotions. It's a little thing, but it never happened before. I was invisible before.

I honestly feel at this point that it's not so much that I've changed, other than physically. It's more that the people around me have changed in direct proportion to my outward change. It is really sad, but true, people judge a book by it's cover way more often than they'll ever admit.

And I'm not entirely sure how I feel about that.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

My self confidence has changed drastically. I honestly do think we change because so many of us were prevented from fully expressing ourselves due to our size. Maybe not change but rather free to be who we were all along or something like that.

I definitely feel more confident and willing to try new things. I started wearing dresses! I hadn't worn a dress since I was a child. And I'm training for a half marathon. Not only is that something I wouldn't have been physically capable of before, it's something I never would have even considered pushing myself to try to do. It's definitely a mental shift, as well as a physical shift. I feel strong and capable now in a way that I wouldn't have considered before.

And certainly my interests have changed. Now I am much more interested in health and fitness and much less interested in the latest video games....

.

Edited March 22, 201610 yr by taramarie523

No, our basic personalities don't change.

However, how we behave and respond to the world around us can indeed change -- subtly or a lot; in the short-term or the long-term.

At least, I certainly hope so!

If people couldn't change, they couldn't grow, recover, mature, repair their lives, have dreams and reach them.

(You weren't hoping you'd remain the same, were you?)

My integrity and Pollyanna optimism have not changed, but I sure do not accept people's abuse anymore. No more door mat. I have more confidence and am better able to speak up for myself. Since I am healthier, I am happier.

You guys are hitting the nail on the head ( at least how I was feeling about it ) ...

I was always thinking that we're pretty much hard wired to be "who" we are ... and unless we also got lobotomy's ... we're always be that way ...

I guess @@Christinamo7 said a key thing "I don't know if I've changed or if they have" ...

I think @ said something key too ... that others react to us differently now ... we're no longer invisible ...

Sad how people and society put a stigma on people who are different than what is considered "normal" .... There is no such thing as normal ...

People who are overweight or have a handicap are often pointed at and laughed at, etc .. we all know this ...

but because we're leaving the weight behind us ... we're now socially acceptable? How sad is that.

I would like to think that people would always treat me as they always have ... because I am the same person I always was ... I just look different ...

I'll stop rambling now ..

Keep the responses coming everyone!

Life is about change. We are supposed to learn and grow as we experience different things and grow older and hopefully wiser.

Although your core values may not change (some of those may even change), huge events in our lives SHOULD change us a little.

I know I am a different person than I was when I got married 27 years ago. Then I changed even more when I had my 2 kids. I've learned some things after losing both my parents that has changed my outlook on certain things. Now that I've had WLS and maintaining my weight loss, I've grown and changed a little yet again. Sure I've changed. But once again it's for the better.

@Babbs Well said Babbs ... well said

I can pretty much echo what most of the others have said .... I know my core morals and values have not changed. That is internally "who" I am. But as for changing in other ways? Yup!

I too am more confident in how I present myself. Not that I treat myself or my viewpoints differently than I did before, but how I present them to others is more open & somewhat more determined. I've always been very outgoing, but like @@Miss Mac said, no more doormat. I find I stand up for myself more now than I ever did before.

I am more goal oriented and more determined to reach the goals I set for myself. That is something new for me. I like it.

Strangers seem to see me more, or rather acknowledge me more. I guess I am no longer the fat chick that just blends into the background. Not a totally bad thing, but I little weird to get used to.

The one thing I have noticed is how my center circle of family & friends DO NOT treat me any different. I love that they love me for me ... always have and always will. They cheer my successes and they support me in my struggles on this journey, but HOW they treat me is the same as it always has been.

It depends on how you were before and how you felt about yourself. I think age and culture is also a factor. I notice that it seems common in certain cultures that being fat means you are worthless and invisible and people give up on looking good and making an effort.

I had a business associate that had WLS and afterwards her personality totally changed. She had never had male attention before and suddenly she had lots of it, and we completely boy crazy. Also due to some other issues in her life, she had to grow up early and missed being a young adult and it was like she reverted to being 18. It was difficult to watch.

I have always been an outgoing confident person and that hasn't changed. I have a different weight loss environment than most people since I live and work alone. I don't have other people projecting their feelings onto me every day about how I look, so that allows me to adjust in my own time and space. I think a big factor about people thinking they are different is other people seeing them differently and projecting different feelings onto them. Like people used to ignore and discount someone and suddenly they have lost weight and seem like a real person to them.

I have always been a flashy dresser, and that hasn't changed. The only difference is I look a lot better in my clothing choices and I have much larger selection of clothing to choose from, and many more stores to shop at since I am at the bottom of plus sizes and the top of normal sizes. I always wore skirts and dresses, now I just wear bodycon dresses more than I wear fit and flares.