My surgery is scheduled May 26th. I've told quite a few people at work about the surgery. Some have been great and some not so great. Since the surgery date has been getting closer I have been thinking a lot about how "open" I want to be going through this process. I just know I will FREQUENTLY get the " How much have you lost so far?" question. Do you tell, or what do you answer to the question? If I hit a stall I don't want to hear the negativity.....should I just say something like "I will divulge the final number when I hit my goal"? Or should I just toughen up and give the weekly updates to everyone who asks?

I told one person. I don't need the negativity. I need to just focus on me and what i was doing. I don't want ppl to monitor my loss, my intake... everything. I felt that would work for me. But now that you've divulged it may help you keep yourself accountable. Keep you motivated and positive knowing everyone is watching. We all know not everyone is accepting of the wls community. Ppl want to see and critique as well as congratulate. I think you got this and just use your own discretion. You know them better. Some will be positive and some will be negative.

Edited May 8, 201511 yr by phatfatgirl

As I get older I definitely care less and less what people think of me....good point though about keeping me accountable....hadn't thought of that angle...

Yep..proudly!

I decided that my initial reaction to "tell or not tell" was "don't tell" and that my initial reaction was wrong for me. The reality is that for me, keeping it a secret was based on a lifetime of feeling shame for being so fat, and not for good reasons such as privacy. So, decided to be very open about the bypass surgery. I did not put it on Facebook, but all my friends, family, and associates knew the surgery was coming, and overall 90% were very supportive. What I don't tell outside of my inner circle is how much weight I have lost -- when people ask I just say "Thanks for asking, I am getting lots healthier" -- I don't want to share that.

I don't hide the surgery per se. I just told the people I wanted to know. I've have a lot of experience with weight loss and choose not to divulge actual numbers. That, for me, can get embarrassing. Like how did I let myself get THAT big?? Its really noone's business....

As I get older I definitely care less and less what people think of me....good point though about keeping me accountable....hadn't thought of that angle...

That's exactly how I feel! I could care less what people say or think about me. I suppose it comes with age. I wish I'd done it sooner.

I'm going to wait until after surgery and have lost some weight to tell people outside of hr and my boss. When I start dropping weight and they ask- ill tell them but not sharing numbers either. My 9 yr old will keep me on task.

I agree with you all about disclosing weight numbers. I remember a person in the Minneapolis airport who came up to me and said "Can I tell you something?". I said ok. She said "If you lost 50 pounds you would be really good looking!". I thought "Boundaries, Lady" but also feel that when God gives you someone like this you should mess with them. So I put my head down, made myself tear up, and said in a small voice "I think I am pretty good looking right now". She ran off.

Over the years when nosey relatives or others would ask my weight, I would just say "Oh, about 2........much" (I have been 400# or bigger for a long time). They always got the idea.

I think if coworkers start asking CONSTANTLY how much I've lost I may just tell them "I'm not sure...I'm only going to weigh myself once a month, but I feel fabulous!" Of course knowing me I will weigh myself every day! Lol

Im kind of lucky, i just started a new job and no one has any idea that i had WLS so i dont have to be constantly reminded about it. However, whenever i meet up with my old colleagues, they are all fully aware that i had the surgery, only one lady always asks how much ive lost, i know she is genuinely happy for me, she has been a very good supportive friend and im not afraid to share my info with her.

I had to really think about if I wanted to tell people or not. I personally share my pre op experiences and my choice to have the surgery with anyone who asks. I'm the type I don't care what they think though lol. I look at it as I may be able to help someone else who is wanting to make this change or the person I'm talki ng to may know someone who needs and wants it and can help them out. I'm just open like that though. Some people are more private. It's all a personal choice.

I feel the being open about my surgery and my progress so far has made me more accountable not only to my own success, but, knowing that if others are aware as well it keeps me more focused. It is actually a motivation for me to succeed! Even the negativity of others motivates me more! My success will only shut them up and make them feel stupid. I am 7 lbs away from my goal weight and 6%body fat from my goal! It has only been 6 1/2 months, but, I have busted my ass harder than anytime since I got out of the Army. I couldn't care less what they think about me or my decision but their negativity does motivate me more to succeed for myself, not to prove anything to them, but their hate does fuel my passion to better myself.