Therapist says "You can do it w/o surgery"

[Swampdoggie 477]

How ignorant. How shortsighted and foolish. What a shame, but you're clearly strong and don't need to be sidetracked by someone who's so uninformed. Hopefully your experience will effect a change in your surgeons practice so that someone without your knowledge and confidence won't be undermined by her. @@MoMo12onTheGo, you go, girl and stay on track with what you know to be necessary.

[ProjectMe 909]

I'm probably in the minority, but I think its a fair question. One that I asked myself before I was asked by my endocrinologist, surgeon, nurse, PA, and psychologist. I answered something to the effect:

"I've been successful at losing in the past, as you can see from my medical history, however I gained it all back numerous times because I lacked that feeling of restriction that I will gain with the sleeve. Also, I feel that I needed to go through those failed experiences to have the strong mindset I have today which combined with WLS will help me be successful in the long term."

To get what you know is best for you and your health...work within the system. I don't think it helps anyone to get upset by questions...be prepared, be calm, be patient, and answer the questions.

Edited to add: Regarding the support group/proof of attendance comment. Also do not see a problem. I had to sign in to each of my support meetings...not to mention, they are part of my medical records. There is nothing wrong with a therapist asking about proof. This is a life changing decision.

Edited March 10, 2015 by ProjectMe

[VSGAnn2014 12,992]

That's one of the most infuriating psych experiences I have EVER heard of on any boards.

What a fucking imbecile.

[IvyLeagueNP 31]

Before you go Thursday you should call up insurance company and ask them what kind of psych eval is needed... If u simply just need the psych eval for the WLS why did she require 3 more sessions? Sounds like she's trying to make some $$$.

[MoMo12onTheGo 66]

@@ProjectMe ...Hi, thanks for responding.. The reason her questioning me was getting on my nerves was because after my psych eval I was required to see a Master Level therapist (on their approved list) to discuss moving on from divorce for 3 sessions where I get to pay $150 each out of my pocket and drive 90m each way. She is not part of my bariatric team and has no reason to go on and on at me like I need her approval. (I wasn't put off my casual questioning to get to know me). I filed for and divorced him in 2008 so wasn't sure why I needed to do that at all but was wiling to jump thru the necessary hoops. I decided to have a positive attitude about it and try to get my moneys worth then got this lady. Ugh! I have my final appt with surgeon next Tuesday so didn't want to bother with rescheduling with someone else. I will let them know, once I am approved, about my experience so they can decide if they should continue to send folks to her.

[Jerr_Bear 241]

I don't know how much of a personal bias a psychologist is supposed to inject into their analysis, but this does not seem very ethical or professional. You would be better served by getting a referral from your surgeon.

[ProjectMe 909]

@@ProjectMe ...Hi, thanks for responding.. The reason her questioning me was getting on my nerves was because after my psych eval I was required to see a Master Level therapist (on their approved list) to discuss moving on from divorce for 3 sessions where I get to pay $150 each out of my pocket and drive 90m each way. She is not part of my bariatric team and has no reason to go on and on at me like I need her approval. (I wasn't put off my casual questioning to get to know me). I filed for and divorced him in 2008 so wasn't sure why I needed to do that at all but was wiling to jump thru the necessary hoops. I decided to have a positive attitude about it and try to get my moneys worth then got this lady. Ugh! I have my final appt with surgeon next Tuesday so didn't want to bother with rescheduling with someone else. I will let them know, once I am approved, about my experience so they can decide if they should continue to send folks to her.

Sorry but I'm confused & I've reread your posts. Who required you to see a master level therapist? Who provided you with this "approved" list? Was it the psychologist from the initial bariatric evaluation? If so, how did they even know about your divorce?

Edited March 11, 2015 by ProjectMe

[Cleo's Mom 257]

I did the Psch Eval and after that was required 3sessions with a therapist to discuss moving on after divorce (I divorced my ex- as in ME divorcing him, not him divorcing me over 5 years ago..we had 28 years and most of them married) I have no idea why the Psych lady thought I needed that nor did I care honestly. I figured "ok, I will find a therapist do the 3sessions to get cleared and skip along my merry way"..

BUT This woman is insists on going over with me every diet I have ever been on and asking me all the questions the surgeon, Nutritionist and Psych Eval person have already been over with me..

Her conclusion? If you can stop yourself after a few ounces once you have surgery, why can't you now? Why can't you just stop?.. OMG the rage that was building in my belly lol.. honestly, I am so tired of being questioned about all of this.. It was not an easy choice AT ALL. I have really been through it up and down and taken 3 years to finally say YES, LET'S DO THIS!..

I lost 80 lbs going from 240-160 back in 2008 using a trainer and a traditional diet.. I am back at 210 and my auto-immune diseases and morbidities have all but taken over my life. She does not understand why I cannot just do it again. Previously, I also was not thru menopause as I am now. I CANNOT go after exercise like a force to be reckoned with as I did before with fibromyalgia, arthritis, degenerative joint disease and on and on..

Sorry to rant, but I cannot believe this woman and all I can do is sit there and repeat in my head I only have to see her three times so just appease her and get the H outta there. UGH!!

People think they know so much.. they have NO IDEA what a hard decision this is.

and BTW.. she didn't mention my Ex even once LOL

Who required you to do the 3 sessions with a therapist to discuss moving on after a divorce? Because it seems to me that it is no one's business that you are getting a divorce. Not the surgeon's and not the insurance company. If YOU decide you need therapy to get over the divorce that is one thing but I don't see how that has any relevance to your upcoming surgery.

The psych evaluation, as many has stated, is so that you understand how the process can affect you emotionally, physically, etc.. and you know what is expected of you and if you have a support system.

But do what you have to do to get approved and them let whoever required this of you that both the requirement and this woman were offensive and unnecessary.

[Chrystee 838]

I did the Psch Eval and after that was required 3sessions with a therapist to discuss moving on after divorce (I divorced my ex- as in ME divorcing him, not him divorcing me over 5 years ago..we had 28 years and most of them married) I have no idea why the Psych lady thought I needed that nor did I care honestly. I figured "ok, I will find a therapist do the 3sessions to get cleared and skip along my merry way"..

BUT This woman is insists on going over with me every diet I have ever been on and asking me all the questions the surgeon, Nutritionist and Psych Eval person have already been over with me..

Her conclusion? If you can stop yourself after a few ounces once you have surgery, why can't you now? Why can't you just stop?.. OMG the rage that was building in my belly lol.. honestly, I am so tired of being questioned about all of this.. It was not an easy choice AT ALL. I have really been through it up and down and taken 3 years to finally say YES, LET'S DO THIS!..

I lost 80 lbs going from 240-160 back in 2008 using a trainer and a traditional diet.. I am back at 210 and my auto-immune diseases and morbidities have all but taken over my life. She does not understand why I cannot just do it again. Previously, I also was not thru menopause as I am now. I CANNOT go after exercise like a force to be reckoned with as I did before with fibromyalgia, arthritis, degenerative joint disease and on and on..

Sorry to rant, but I cannot believe this woman and all I can do is sit there and repeat in my head I only have to see her three times so just appease her and get the H outta there. UGH!!

People think they know so much.. they have NO IDEA what a hard decision this is.

and BTW.. she didn't mention my Ex even once LOL

sounds like her personal bias..

[Cococat 119]

Let me guess ... this psychologist is a lot younger than you, in her thirties, or less. She has not reached the age when physical things start to kick in - like slower metabolism, arthritis (which inhibits or prevents adaquate exercise) or menopause which changes a LOT of things about the body. She hasn't got a clue!

Please do talk it over with your surgeon. She is basically telling you NOT to have the operation. That is counterproductive to your doctor's bariatric practice. He should cross her off his list of referrals, not only because she has no clue about bariatrics, but she is not doing you or your physician any good.

[Sharon1964 2,530]

This person is not a psychologist as that requires a doctorate. She is likely a marriage and family therapist (MFT), licensed clinical social worker (LCSW) or the equivalent in your state.

Not only would I complain to your surgeon, I would file a complaint with her state licensing board.

And by the way, you are being way overcharged. A Master's level therapist makes about $50 to $75 per 50 minute session in a mid-sized city. I would mention that to the surgeon as well.

Sharon

(before I changed careers to running a pain management office, I ran mental health offices for about 13 years)

[MoMo12onTheGo 66]

@@Jerr_Bear Hi Jerr.. the person I am seeing is based on the referral list from my surgeon.

[MoMo12onTheGo 66]

@@ProjectMe .. The psych eval woman gives her recommendation to the surgeon and he signs off on it then it became a required hoop to jump thru. The surgeons office gave me the referral list of Master Level therapists that I could choose from, based on the evaluators recommendation that I discuss moving on from my divorce 8 years ago before undergoing surgery.

[MoMo12onTheGo 66]

@@Cleo's Mom ..The psych eval woman gives her recommendation to the surgeon and he signs off on it then it became a required hoop to jump thru. The surgeons office gave me the referral list of Master Level therapists that I could choose from, based on the evaluators recommendation that I discuss moving on from my divorce 8 years ago before undergoing surgery.

[MoMo12onTheGo 66]

@@Cococat ..Good instincts.. you described her pretty well and yes, I feel like she is telling me not to get the surgery. My visits (tomorrow is the last thank goodness) was never even about her discussing surgery. I was referred because the evaluator decided I need to see someone based on my 400 question survey that her computer spit out stats on. It's all nerve wracking. I am just glad I can get her signed off of my list tomorrow.