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Overwhelmed at the thought of the new way of life I will have to adapt



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Hello Everyone.....Nov 7 is my meeting with my surgeon to go over all forms and submit to insurance....the DR said my insurance would come back within 2 weeks and then I will get a date. I am so overwhelmed with all of the details and trying to think about how my new life will be. I compare it to waking up one day and living in Mars. I looked at the post op meal plan and I cant phathom 2 teaspoons of pureed tuna fish for a meal.....I cant picture not being able to gulp down a bottle of Water in 30 seconds.....how do you chew your meal until it is like applesauce in your mouth.....the NUT told me I would hardly be able to swallow my pills/vitamins and to get chewable everything.....

Please tell me there are other people out there whose heads are spinning just like mine......everyone seems so excited and ready.....I am scared out of my mind!! I have talked to a few people at a support group and they are all sunshine and roses...I ask what their struggles were and they seem to not have any....I just dont buy it......

I know I will get through this....but I would love to hear from other people who are scared like me so I feel like I am not alone....and I would love to hear from some people who are past this bumpy section ~~~ maybe you have tips that will help me get through this phase and prepare for life on Mars.

Thank you.

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hi maui girl i'm pretty sure almost everyone is a little nervous including myself. I look at it this way we probably won't be able to eat more than pureed tuna and hopefully it will satisfy. and I just keep thinking about results too.Ihope that might help alittle good luck and alhoa :)

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Just take one day at a time and try not to get to far ahead of yourself. Follow the program recommendations, they are designed to help you be successful!

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Yes, I am going in with eyes wide open and it is very scary.

I draw a parallel on this to childbirth. I remember as an expectant mother that other mothers, including recent ones all came up roses as well. When asked "how your delivery went?" Every single person said it went really well. For me it was the most horrible gruesome thing I had ever gone through and mine was a fairly normal delivery. Really well, is not what I would describe childbirth as. Yet, I would do it again. But I felt lied to by everyone, even my own mother, who probably was the most honest of the bunch. Everyone seems to think everything is wonderful and rosie. It is odd to me, as I am not wired that way. If you ask me I will tell you the truth. It will be a balance answer about pros, cons, and what the expect. After that experience I tend not to trust others assessments. I read between the lines and have to dig a hole to China for the truth.

I fear I may not be able to cope and that I will be miserable all the time more then anything else. But the alternative is just as bad. Obesity kills and robs you of the chance of having a normal life. So, I have to give it my best shot. It is a leap of faith into the great unknown but it is also a leap of HOPE, one that I do not possess in my current situation. I hope things will workout in the end just like having a baby. Mothers do die in childbirth, some have horrible complications but we all know it's worth it. Many before me had WLS and they ended up okay. Look at everyone on this site post surgery. They are real and their stories inform our futures. You can't grow (in our case shrink) unless you try.

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Think of getting your sleeve as starting over as a baby. You start off with just liquids, then progress to soft puréed foods, then a little more solid foods, and finally you start seeing what you can tolerate. This all takes months. But once you get through the "stages" of post op you will be able to eat like you did before, just a lot less!

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The early days and weeks post op suck, there is no two ways around it. I guess for me the key was staying focused on why I did the wls and my goals. I lost 160# plus and it was worth it!

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Thank you cowgirl for calling it like it is. recovery is going to suck. I need that! If everyone tells me it's not so bad, or that it's only a couple days, I'm going to think I'm the only one having it hard and that will make me depressed. I have to get mentally ready and expectations are such an important component of this. A boxer has to get mentally prepared for a fight, not that I enjoy boxing, quite the contrary.

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I didn't think recovery was bad at all. I don't have a particularly high tolerance for pain, but I left the hospital the day after surgery, went home and was out shopping the next day.

I was tired, nauseated, and a bit sore, but I was fine.

I had to take anti nausea meds for about three months and I had (have) a slight stricture, so I stayed on liquids/purées for about 2 months. That sucked, but I had no desire to eat much so it was no big deal. I was seriously fine. Absolute truth. :)

I think the worst part was the nausea whenever I ate but the meds took care of that, and the fatigue. The fatigue left at three weeks so, again, no big deal.

Edited by LipstickLady

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Okay, I'm having your recovery. I would like a "no big deal" with a side of Protein Shake, please. Lol

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Thank you all for your replies.

Beni, it sounds like you and I think alike. I am a planner in every sense of the word. I like to plan for and think about the worst case scenario.... I do it with every part of my life ....I hope it will all be ok...but I am fearful of the process. It is hard to imagine what life will be like on the other side...

I don't have kids so I can't relate to the childbirth stories.....but I can imagine it is similar...life will never be the same and it will be hard work!

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Yes, my husband calls me "The master of the hypothetical horrors." I tell him, I have a nice thing going here. Because I think of the worst first and it's not likely to happen, I always come up on top with a most pleasant surprise. If things do go wrong I don't fall to pieces. The WORST is when things go much worse then expected. I can't deal with that. Well, I can, but not well! The down side is I probably spend too much time worrying about my scenarios while I could be doing something more productive. But then I tell him, we all can't be perfect like you. End of convo, lol

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I know people have different approaches to things, and different psychological makeup; some are more dramatic-types, others, not. Go into a surgery with your head thinking POSITIVELY. All those negative thoughts, and negative energy, brings negative results, poorer outcomes.

Recovery doesn't have to "suck."

Yes, some things will feel differently than usual. You'll have incisions (and some pain/tenderness), because yes, you've been cut. Healing occurs. Swelling must go down. There are initial restrictions. You may have a drain which, yes, is uncomfortable for a while.

Accept things as what they are and why; don't make it worse than it has to be.

Seriously...patients who go into a procedure with all that dread and negativity mostly have more negative results. Some anxiety is normal; but if you're negative and really dreading, then wait until your spirit is more calm and accepting of what you're about to do...and why.

Negative patient energy is not a good thing for anyone, especially the patient. Best wishes for a great, successful surgery and an uneventful recovery.

Edited by Dr-Patient

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Thank you for your input. I am not scared at all about the procedure or the pain. I am scared about how life will be afterwards. In 3 months will I regret my decision....will I watch my husband eat anything he wants and be jealous.....

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No question, this is a crazy journey you are about to embark on. That said, I have a 90% sleeve. They tell me my doc does a smaller than average pouch and I. Am. Fine. You'll find your "new normal" post-op. The first month was hard while my stomach was swollen. I ate with a baby spoon and struggled to get my fluids and Protein in, but worked my way up to 75+g per day and 64oz of Water. At 3 months I could eat about 2 oz of moist meat. At 6 months no more than 4oz. Today, I'm satisfied on 4oz of most food... 1/2 cup of chili, 1 Chipolte taco, 1 egg with a slice of cheese on it.

I used to struggle with "dieting". Today, I eat what I like how I like it in very small quantities. I cannot over eat because it makes me physically ill. I choose Protein first 95% of the time. I eat carbs. :-o, yes, CARBS! I exercise 5 days per week, (yes, this is a new habit for me) and an active body needs carbs to function. I work the things I want, (chocolate) into my day around the things I need, (protein). For me, the key has been to move my body, get my protein and never, ever over eat. The rest has kind of taken care of its self. This has been the best gift EVER, to be free from an obsession with food!

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So I'm here to throw my 2 cents in, since I'm pretty new to the process - 2 weeks post surgery. I was in the hospital overnight, and while a bit nauseous, was able to get down Water and a bit of diluted apple juice. The first couple of days home I was so tired I slept most of the day and night. I started on the Protein drink (Pure Protein) and although it took a couple of hours to drink one, I managed to get in two per day. Now I can finish one in about an hour. Progress!!!

I did have some cream of chicken Soup the other night, which was delish. I had just a bit of yogurt the other day, and some cottage cheese yesterday. You really think you're going to be able to eat a small container full, but believe me, you can't! I have tried to eat more than a couple of spoonfuls and you feel it right in your throat. If you don't stop, then you're going to be throwing up and that hurts worse!

The "good" thing about all that is that you're really not hungry, so the two or three spoonfuls is actually good. You get the taste of whatever it is you're eating, and it really is enough to satisfy. Shoot, it even takes me 10-15 minutes to eat sugar free Jello cup!

I'm so content with the two Protein shakes and tons of Water a day, that I'm not really even motivated to "eat" other foods, but know that I need to at some point. That to me is the scariest part of this at this point.

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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