Hi Everyone I'm new to this site but so happy I found it! I'm in the early stages of preparing for surgery (got all paperwork just waiting on consult and date) so not sure if there has been anyone who posted these feelings so forgive me if I missed it.

I'm a single mom with 2 kids, 8 & 13 and they don't have a good relationship with their dad. I'm so freaked out about dying from the wls and leaving them alone and them ending up with their father! I understand that being 41, with a 50 BMI and on blood pressure meds is not a good place to be either but I feel ok. Has anyone else been in this position?

I'm also very nervous about my future relationship with food. I'm a devout foodie..love good food and wine. My biggest issue is quantity. I may be fat but I don't eat crap. Will I be able to still be a foodie? It seems silly but I'm scared of losing that part of me.

With all this being said I am excited. I don't want to be the fat girl anymore.

Any and all comments would be so greatly appreciated!

Welcome! I am pretty much in the same boat as you, about to turn 39 with a BMI of 50/51. I am also a single mother to a child who wants nothing to do with his father, but he has an awesome relationship with my parents and brother. But I am excited and feel as thou my weight and health will kill me before surgery would! At my consultation my surgeon told me I was a great candidate and probably more healthy than any patient he would see that day. Make sure you have a surgeon you are 100% comfortable with and will answer any and all questions you have. Make sure to do lots of research on this website along with other research online. Ask around, you'd be surprised there may be someone in your circle who already had the surgery and can be your "buddy" thru the whole process. I was extremely surprised to find out 2 people I know had it and I had no clue!

As for the foodie in you, you will till be that same person who loves all kids of foods! After a while you will be able to have just about anything, you just have to learn portion control.

Good luck to you and welcome to this wonderful site!!

You will be fine. I can understand the concern. I was a lucky one and the surgary was not bad at all. I felt almost like normal by 2 1/2 week. Mainly the food portions will be changed. I know before I had surgery I had all the same emotions. Excited scared. I have not had wine yet. My dr wants me to hold off for at least 6 months or longer. Hang in there. This is a great tool.

I know how you feel .I'm scared too but I have come to realize I'm doing nothing but cheating myself and my family by being this big .i don't want to do things because I'm to tired or ashamed. I have 100 + lbs to loose this surgery will change our life in such a good way.I want to be able to live again enjoy life to its fullest.I have mine done on Aug 5th hang in there we can do this !

Hi! I'm Katie. I am a mother of two kids ages 9 and 6. I am just beginning in this process. I go this Wednesday for my family doctor referral and then August 26th for my original surgery consult. I'm excited and scared all at the same time. My BMI is 43 and I'm hoping that is enough to qualify me. I've been lucky enough to not have any serious health problems. I just need to be approved by my insurance company and go through 6 months of education and evals.... so, here's hoping!

Yes, I feel all of those feelings as well. I turned 40 this year and my husband and I have been trying to adopt a baby for the past three years. I know our weight has probably turned some birth mothers away from us but I've been so scared about surgery. Last year, two friends of mine had the sleeve done so that has helped to build my confidence up about doing it. I just finally said I don't want to be the fat mom or have our weight be an issue for any potential baby adoption. I've completed the support group meeting requirements so now I just have two more nutritional consults left before everything gets submitted to my insurance. I have a size 16 skirt that I probably wore 20 years ago still hanging in my closet. I am determined to wear it again!

What I found was the support group meetings really pumped me up for the surgery but within a couple days after, I get back to the worry part of it. Tons of mixed emotions here so you're definitely not alone in that!

Edited July 28, 201412 yr by JerzyTomato74