What do you do when you can't turn to food anymore?

[JillC878 59]

OK, will not give you TMI, but I am going thru some things right now and my life is not the easiest (poor baby - said sarcastically). What bring me to this question right now is my current condition. I am dealing with something with someone who I thought was my best friend and I can't stop crying. I really want candy....chocolate. Anything I can eat/binge on.

What do you do? I quit smoking over a year ago and now can't (or shouldn't) eat what would normally make me feel better. I know that eating (even if it is chocolate) will not fix things or actually make me fee better, but the urge it still there and strong. This is making me cry worse. It hurts.

Please tell me others understand what I am saying. I am open to any thoughts, stories, or suggestions. Please....I don't know what to do.

[Southjerzjoy 40]

I am so sorry you're so sad. Hugs. Whatever it is you're going through this too shall pass. In the meantime I don't how you feel about reading but I was like to escape into a good book or maybe stop at the drugstore and buy yourself some new nail polish and some nail stickers and do your nails. I truly believe the chocolate may make you feel better for a split second but the results from that chocolate will stick with you for a while not worth it. Make yourself some Water with fresh fruit and put it in a cocktail glass. Maybe a squirt of MIO or Crystal light little juice thing that flavor your water. Turn your frown upside down and make yourself a little pretend happy hour.

[NMJG 1,266]

Can you go see a movie? That's a good one for me. At home I even have my go-to collection when i'm upset:

Mama Mia

Independence Day

Pride and Prejudice

Hope you feel better soon!

[Madam Reverie 2,958]

Hmm.. can you take that hurt and turn it into a bit of anger?

If so, (which is what I do), I clean. Yep, it's pathetic, but I clean when I'm angry.

I scrub the ever-living-f*** out of the cupboards, the bath, the floor; you name it, I clean it.

I am like a woman possessed. At the end of my crazy cleaning session, I am tired, I have had the time to mull over what ever has bothered me, I have new perspectives and, as an added bonus - a very clean house!

After that, I am usually so tired, I sit down in my comfortable and beautifully clean house. Have a cup of tea and a biscuit. Then its the film and a little nap.

Might not solve your problems, but its an excellent distraction/displacement activity which has the added bonus of leaving you with a lovely clean house.

Chin up chicken

[Texasmeg 568]

We all need to learn to feel our feelings rather than cover them up. I like the idea of feeling the anger and using it to do something physically demanding and productive (like cleaning your house).

[Noor1969 150]

I wish I had an easy solution to your problem but I don't because I'm dealing with the same thing. I get sleeved on Tuesday and am facing a divorce from binging and compulsive eating. I wish I had more faith in myself right now but I don't. It's sink or swim for me as I am NOT going to back out of having the surgery. I figure that I'm just going to have to suck it up and handle it somehow, otherwise I will stay obese and unhappy.

I've given myself permission to see a therapist if the feelings become unbearable. Perhaps that's something that may help you as well. In the meantime, please continue to post here. We care.

[LindafromFlorida 1,542]

My advice also is to keep yourself busy and find a project. Cross-stitch. Anything! I have re-done my closet from top to bottom. I love consignment and thrift stores. I read. Watch movie after movie. I have re-done my dresser drawers. I have absolutely no candy or sweets in this house for any weak moment. Diabetes x two of us equals NO. I got sleeved, my diabetes is gone thank God, no more Metformin, and trying to get my husband healthier and hope one day he might be off insulin. If you read the posts everywhere Jill, everyone is suffering the loss or want of something. Fighting that battle. Get tough and get healthier girl. Counting our blessings, right Jill? :-) Linda

[Ballermom 803]

I talk to some one right before they wheeled me into surgery , who was supposed to be that important to me. And i wouldnt have predicted but, the next time I talk to them again was 9 months Later. I didn't even get a well being, congratulations, are you ok check. What I learned was I didn't need them as much as I thought. Because in the meantine i was too busy getting skinny, anyway. Call it pay back.lol

Ironically when we did get together we still had a wonderful time.

You are strong by mere fact of being on this Journey. I also learned to spend time around the ones who Celebrate me a and not just Tolerate me.

You can do it.

Edited February 17, 2014 by Ballermom

[Ballermom 803]

Oh I'm staying far from from chocalate,

it contributed to big a headache. Just saying. I'd rather clean.

[puchy123 56]

I'm sorry you're going through hard times, I too had a ugly friendship breakup, don't let temptation get to you, it will only make you feel worse afterwards. Believe me I've done it. Then I decided to do something better and healthier big physically and mentally , I turn to exercise it keeps your mind off things and helps you with your goal. Keep your head up. Good luck

[GastricBypassNY 25]

I can relate with you on so many levels. Good friends are hard to come by. It's so painful when you lose one. No matter who is at fault. Turning to comfort food is my gut reaction too. A few snickers, reeses, kit kats, godiva chocolates. I HATE myself once I step on my scale the next morning. These days I exercise or hit the gym HARD when I get urges to binge or eat emotionally. I'll pump the music up on my headphones to MAX volume and run a few miles if it's nice out. Talk to another friend or someone you're close with to get these feelings off your chest. Good luck.

[ElyQuint 446]

I remember feeling panic when I first had to actually feel negative feelings. Like emotional arm flailing panic. Now its yoga and meditation. Including cleaning. If I feel a lack I look for abundance. Radical self love. Do something good for you!

[LipstickLady 25,682]

Like Revs, when I'm p!ssed, I clean. I throw crap out, I scrub, I sort... I'm a tad OCD, so organizing is very soothing and I can get lost in a good scrub session for hours. The end result, unlike binging, is so rewarding and I truly feel that clearing physical clutter clears mental clutter as well.

My other go to is Zumba. Nothing like turning up some good loud music and concentrating on a dance routine. You can't stay too upset when you are having a great time and sweating out some frustration.

Find a healthy habit or hobby and really go for it. food is not the answer nor is it really your friend in bad times.

[Fiddleman 4,376]

Can you write it down, crumple it up and throw it away? Sometimes when stresses are getting to me, I will mentally minimize it and internally acknowledge it is not going to help to stress on it. So I decide not to. And usually the stress in my own head vanishes because my mind has a way of psycho analyzing everything and blowing up circumstances that, in reality, are not as big as I make them. I used to not be able to do this and would get into bad mental states over and over again, but then came to an enlightenment about how much control we actually have over our own thought processes and our own reactions about 2 years ago. Additionally, if you can exercise, go get you some endorphins. That will make you feel better in no time. all in all, taking a mental break from internal dialog caused by stress, whether temporary or permanent, will go a long ways to creating life that suits your needs and desires.