My surgery is scheduled for March 3rd and one of my biggest stressors is telling people about the surgery. The only people who currently know are my husband and his parents. I have a strained relationship with my family, so I've already decided to not tell them (they all live across the country so this won't be hard).

My issue is that I am a nurse and will be out of work for a month, so I know there will be questions about where I am. I don't want a lot of attention drawn to me and I definitely don't want people talking about me behind my back (working with mostly women!), so I'm not sure what to say.

I also am not sure if I will tell my closest friends. I feel they may be too judging...

Being around other ppl who have had bariatric surgery... People don't always want the best for you and would rather see someone fail!

Any advice on how to handle this?

Everyone has been very supportive except my sister and brother. They don't ask how I am doing or feel. Amazing to me. Think they might be jealous or I took the easy way out. Oh well! I'm proud and my husband is very supportive!!

Carols5417, I had lost 125 pounds since I had seen my Bro and Sis in Law, they walked in and said "Hey, how you doing" Not another word....... and I had drove 12 hours to hear THAT!, YEP, they are jealous, and THEY are the ones with a problem, NOT US. Hold that head up high.. you should be very proud! Keep up the great work.

I am very proud of what I have accomplished with the sleeve's help as well as support of my friends and my surgical team. Interacting on the forum and tracking in myfitnesspal.com has really helped. I'm lower than my goal, and trying to add back healthy foods along with my Protein.

I also work with all women. I told one and the whole office knows. I didn't think it would be a big deal for people to know but a lot of people are being rude... Just diet, you don't need this... I wish I wouldn't have said anything.

My advice is... stop caring what other ppl think. I don't and believe me.... it is therapeutic. I too am a nurse. I love when people want me to fail cuz it fuels my fire even more. I can usually sniff those ppl out and do my best to really irritate them with my success. I just got into NP school and a lot of those ppl are even more irritated.... I am going to be skinny AND move up the career ladder. Yea... I love ppl who want to see me fail. I internally thank them for giving me relentless motivation.

Woohoo luv ur attitude, how much have u lost & when did u have ur surgery? my surgery is scheduled for 3/24/14. Im changing careers and taking the LPN entry exam 3/21/14, i currently have a MPA masters in public administration. Im looking forward to being a skinny nurse lol.

Carols5417, I had lost 125 pounds since I had seen my Bro and Sis in Law, they walked in and said "Hey, how you doing" Not another word....... and I had drove 12 hours to hear THAT!, YEP, they are jealous, and THEY are the ones with a problem, NOT US. Hold that head up high.. you should be very proud! Keep up the great work.

Wow thats all they said. Just rude & jealous, are they overweight? Kudos to you for losing 125, screw them. I would have turned around & left. Some people.

At first I didn't want anyone to know but my parents and my husband. Of course I had to tell HR so that way I could get days off without pressure. But my dad told some aunts of mine and the day of my surgery one of my aunts tagged me on Facebook wanting to know how my surgery went. That night I saw it and was mortified. Then the one million Questions came from everyone that knew me, if I was OK, what I had. I told my husband Oh well cats out of the bag. At first I didn't want to be judged because you hear people talking bad about people who have had the surgery. But then I realized No One knows the pain I go through with my Rheumatoid Arthritis daily. I'm only thirty and I hated feeling like a burden to my spouse and family not being able to keep up. Now I'm only 3 1/2 wks out and with what weight loss I have had, I feel great. Now I don't care what people think. And Its true, when you start telling people, you find out who your true friends are. I feel like if it didn't come out now it would eventually.

I just read a Yahoo article on someone that has lost hundreds of pounds - she was over 600 and lost 393 pounds. Here's a paragraph from the article: Her wake-up call came when, in preparation for a gastric bypass surgery that would ultimately fail, she had to be weighed on a freight scale.

There are comments below the article that had me fuming - "I'm glad she lost it the natural way and not thru surgery!" "She'd be pretty if she lost another 50 pounds." Another person commented on the fact that most of the motorized scooters used in grocery stores are used by the overweight people that only fill their carts with soda and chips.

People will have their opinions whether they are members of our family, friends or acquaintances. I'm a very private person - I am not an open book about most aspects of my life. I chose to keep things I'm going thru from the flu to my VSG private. I have only shared this with the people I can trust have my best interest and will support me. This journey is about my health and my ability to feel good about myself for the first time since I was about 17 years old - I have not allowed negativity in my life, I don't have time for it.

On March 5th I will be exactly 1 year out. I am down 82 pounds and went from a size 18 to size 8! I am thrilled with my progress and so happy I made this choice. I didn't tell anyone but my husband and while reflecting back I am glad I made this decision and it was definitely right for me. My close friends and family see me working out vigorously and that I have changed my eating habits dramatically. No one has ever questioned how I am loosing they are just happy I have. Everyone needs to make their own decision.

I just finished nursing school.. and to be honest, the entire time I was uncomfortable, especially during all the obesity and co-morbidity lectures (which are included in basically every class). I'm older than most new graduate nurses and afraid nobody is going to want to hire me compared to the young, pretty and slim nurses. I want to be comfortable in my own skin again.

Edited February 28, 201412 yr by moonchild41

On March 5th I will be exactly 1 year out. I am down 82 pounds and went from a size 18 to size 8! I am thrilled with my progress and so happy I made this choice. I didn't tell anyone but my husband and while reflecting back I am glad I made this decision and it was definitely right for me. My close friends and family see me working out vigorously and that I have changed my eating habits dramatically. No one has ever questioned how I am loosing they are just happy I have. Everyone needs to make their own decision.

Woohoo congratulations, I would luv to be a size 8 lol.

I just finished nursing school.. and to be honest, the entire time I was uncomfortable, especially during all the obesity and co-morbidity lectures (which are included in basically every class). I'm older than most new graduate nurses and afraid nobody is going to want to hire me compared to the young, pretty and slim nurses. I want to be comfortable in my own skin again.

Congratulations for completing nursing school. Im scheduled to take the LPN entry example 3/21/14, im so nervous. The math & science is scaring me. I know im not dumb I have a MPA, just nervous. Ughhh

I just finished nursing school.. and to be honest, the entire time I was uncomfortable, especially during all the obesity and co-morbidity lectures (which are included in basically every class). I'm older than most new graduate nurses and afraid nobody is going to want to hire me compared to the young, pretty and slim nurses. I want to be comfortable in my own skin again.

Congratulations for completing nursing school. Im scheduled to take the LPN entry example 3/21/14, im so nervous. The math & science is scaring me. I know im not dumb I have a MPA, just nervous. Ughhh

You'll do great. Math and science were always my weakest subjects and I just survived a BSN program! If you need any help or advice, just let me know!

I was very hesitant about telling people. I made the decision to let my close friends know about 1 week before surgery. I have received nothing but positive support. I did the surgery for me, so at the end of the day mine is the only opinion that matters. I'm 6 months out and haven't heard a negative word from anyone.

I hope you find the same support.