He wins! Last night I was told that he thought it was extremely selfish of me to have my tummy tuck during his busy season! Let's see, who knew how long getting insurance approval would take, who knew they would approve it in two weeks with a short window that, besides his busy season, included the birth of our first grandchild and then lambing season (very intense time for me), who knew my Mom would pass away the day before my surgery after a long illness. He works for fedex, yes, busy, but not rocket science! Wow! He had a bad day yesterday and blamed it on my surgery four and a half weeks ago. Wow! Just makes me want to do more to help him out. Why do some people not realize they flys with honey than vinegar! Thanks for letting me vent, and not murder him!

Wonder what his side of the story is?

He had to do stuff around house that I do, including my livestock. I was watering with a 1 gallon bucket by 10 days post op. I wasn't cooking him a full (soup, salad, sides, and meat dinner), I wasn't eating with him because I don't really have an appetite but sat with him, which pissed him off. He's had to deal with my mood swings, loss of mom, recup from surgery, deal with Xmas emotions, deal with pending baby emotions). When he is stressed he tends to blame, and not want to hear any advice. His dad was a brilliant physician, who would now be diagnoses with Aspergers syndrome (I'm in special ed so I'm not just making that up), so dh didn't have a good role model for dealing with social and emotional issues. When life is fine so is he, when he gets stressed all social skills go down the toilet. He'll apologize, probably this evening, but it gets old! Was it extra work for him, yes, but he also got much nicer specialty meals waiting on the table, something I'm not good at!

, it sounds like he needs back rub, too! !!I am not saying he's right, but he has taken a quite a bit onto himself, too! Give him a break!! Tongue in cheek here too!Karen..aka.kll724

I'm sorry to hear he said that! It sounds to me like he's stressed out, and taking it out on you! If he's typically supportive, I wouldn't think he'd say that to intentionally hurt you.

Maybe he doesn't take stress well. That's no reason for him to be called the bad hubby of the year. Take in to consideration all that he did.

Venting is so helpful, isn't it??! I'm so glad we have a place to do so.

Surgery stresses everyone in the family, and being farmers, you and he both know that the action never stops on a farm. I doubt any time of year would be a good time for you to be laid up for a while. I'm sorry for the loss of your mother. You've been through quite a lot and seem to be making it out of the dark very well. Keep a good attitude and just try to love him more when he acts tough.

Congratulations on your new grandbaby! May you have many more years of fun and good times with your family.

Now I know why I'm not married.

I'd just beat the crap out of him... Just kidding!! LOL!

my husband is in chronic pain. boy he can be grouchy. i just get quiet when i see this mood. thank God for his man cave. i even tell him to go away . we have been married 28 years and he has been very supportive and taking care of me because of a lot of medical issues i have had in our marriage. one day i thought i would kill him. really i did. we didn't talk for days. but one morning we both had enough and even though it was really hard we laid everything out that was bothering us. and we made a pact. before it gets to the no talking stage we quickly remind each other the different things we are going through and that it is those things that makes us angry. we love each other and that will never change. another thing we are doing is more physical touching. longer kisses. etc. with all the pain medications and i am on 25 pills just in the morning we have found that the physical side of our relationship took a dive. thank God we are devoted to each other. most marriages would have crashed and burned. find a quiet moment and let him know how he is making you feel and let him vent too. make a vow that you won't let these things hurt your relationship. i send you prayers you are going through a hard time.

We've been married 30 years, I just needed to vent. He just makes some absurd comments sometime! Many, many moons ago I was in pre term labor with our third child. DH was giving me all kinds of fits about how I was going to make him lose his job if he had to keep helping out. My OB, who was a friend, found out about it and to this day neither one will tell me what was said but DH was much better (perfect, as a matter of fact) for a long time. Maybe I should give Angelo a call

We have been married for 23 years this next June and I have found that hubby gets into fits with me when he is stressed because he knows I am his safe release. He moves past it by the next day, hurts me yes and very aggravating, but I know he loves us. And I know I blow up too. I always try to keep perspective when he goes off.