Jump to content
×
Are you looking for the BariatricPal Store? Go now!

how did you tell friends and family.



Recommended Posts

I have told my closest friends and family but not everyone. Any advice?

I would probably leave it where you now have it. As others remark on your weight loss, just say "thank you". If they ask how you did it, answer "through dieting an excerise". Not a lie, as WLS is just a tool, to make it work you have to diet and excerise.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

For those I havent told. I just chalk it up to a lifestyle change

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told immediate family- husband and adult children. I also told my manager, my supervisor, and a coworker I am close to. I was told I should have at least two support people at work who know what I'm going through just in case I get sick (dumping, nausea, bathroom issues, etc. Or heaven forbid, a real emergency situation). Aside from that I told no one else.

My daughter accidentally spilled the Beans to my mother-in-law, who can be super critical and ignorant. I got the usual "You did so good all those times you lost weight before! You should've done that again instead!" If I did so good why did I gain it back? Duh! And word is getting around at work - I think there has been some eavesdropping on personal conversations. That's resulting in some stupid and personal questions I put a stop to by saying "That's personal and I don't want to talk about it". And one person is now saying she wants to have surgery to get rid of the 20lbs she can't seem to lose... ((((roll eyes)))).

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told immediate family- husband and adult children. I also told my manager' date=' my supervisor, and a coworker I am close to. I was told I should have at least two support people at work who know what I'm going through just in case I get sick (dumping, nausea, bathroom issues, etc. Or heaven forbid, a real emergency situation). Aside from that I told no one else.

My daughter accidentally spilled the Beans to my mother-in-law, who can be super critical and ignorant. I got the usual "You did so good all those times you lost weight before! You should've done that again instead!" If I did so good why did I gain it back? Duh! And word is getting around at work - I think there has been some eavesdropping on personal conversations. That's resulting in some stupid and personal questions I put a stop to by saying "That's personal and I don't want to talk about it". And one person is now saying she wants to have surgery to get rid of the 20lbs she can't seem to lose... ((((roll eyes)))).[/quote']

Stupid is as stupid does right? Lol

If someone said that they were goibg to have surgery to lose 20 lbs to me, my sarcasm would kick in and I would say "oh you should totally do that! You would look so much better!!". If people are stupid and say stuff like that they deserve to get it right back.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't care to share my WLS with the world. It's my personal experience and I keep it that way. With that said, my husband knows, my in-laws and my closest friend and her husband.

I haven't even told my own mother, nor my sister because they wouldn't understand it and both would freak out.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Stupid is as stupid does right? Lol

If someone said that they were goibg to have surgery to lose 20 lbs to me' date=' my sarcasm would kick in and I would say "oh you should totally do that! You would look so much better!!". If people are stupid and say stuff like that they deserve to get it right back.[/quote']

Right? I just ignore stupidity, though. If I didn't I couldn't work there anymore... I'd get fired for sure. :-)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I told immediate family- husband and adult children. I also told my manager' date=' my supervisor, and a coworker I am close to. I was told I should have at least two support people at work who know what I'm going through just in case I get sick (dumping, nausea, bathroom issues, etc. Or heaven forbid, a real emergency situation). Aside from that I told no one else.

My daughter accidentally spilled the Beans to my mother-in-law, who can be super critical and ignorant. I got the usual "You did so good all those times you lost weight before! You should've done that again instead!" If I did so good why did I gain it back? Duh! And word is getting around at work - I think there has been some eavesdropping on personal conversations. That's resulting in some stupid and personal questions I put a stop to by saying "That's personal and I don't want to talk about it". And one person is now saying she wants to have surgery to get rid of the 20lbs she can't seem to lose... ((((roll eyes)))).[/quote']

Gee i just hate that! Thats probably the worst part- those people who talk and smirk. I havent told many people either, still planning the surgery. I am grateful to use your phrase, "thats personal and I dont want to talk about it". I also have a huge fear of the dumping syndrome.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I've only told my immediate family and my two closest friends. I have no plans to tell anyone else. My in-laws don't even know.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

That a good thing. The more you tell, the more people may try to talk you out of it. When surgery is done, telling people may be something you want to do or not. It's your choice. I told everyone right away, deciding to educate. But you have to do what you feel comfortable with.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Not everyone agrees with WLS and most if not all are ready to judge and give you horror stories on why you shouldn't get the procedure.

For myself my family knew and 2 of my friends who had the procedure. Only supporters of my friendship and my choices need to know, the rest well they see me loosing weight and if they ask how I have no problem telling them how I used WLS as a tool to my success :)

Good luck

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I have no problems telling people that I'm going through surgery. My family knows, my bosses know. Luckily, I don't have to worry about co-workers as I'm the only person!! My Sunday school class knows as they have been praying for me. If someone asks whatI I'm having done, I don't care to tell them. If they want to try to tell me a horror story, I tell them I've done all the research, good and bad, and have made this decision. That usually stops them.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I tell people straight up. There is nothing embarassing about correcting a problem.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I wasn't embarrassed. I didn't want to hear any negative comments about something that is nobody's business but my own. I don't have to defend or justify my decisions to anyone else.

A big factor in deciding who to tell was my not wanting to be the subject of gossip. At work my support people knew. As far as anyone else knew when I talked about it I was having major abdominal surgery and the type and reason for it was personal. We talked very general. Somehow or other the one single coworker in our branch who is a malicious gossip found out it was WLS surgery (I think she eavesdropped on private conversations held in our vault room). She told everyone else, and the floaters who filled in while I was gone, and some of our credit union members. I actually caught her telling someone I didn't know when I came back. I was livid!!! Giving my personal info to anyone with ears when I never even told HER! I gave her a piece of my mind, told my manager, and filed a complaint with HR. We have a very strict privacy policy, both for our members and CU employees, which we receive training on every year. Just thinking about it makes me angry all over again.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now

  • Trending Products

  • Trending Topics

  • Recent Status Updates

    • BeanitoDiego

      I've hit a stall 9 months out. I'm not worried, though. My fitness levels continue to improve and I have nearly accomplished my pre-surgery goal of learning to scuba dive! One dive left to complete to get my PADI card 🐠
      I was able to go for a 10K/6mile hike in the mountains two days ago just for the fun of it. In the before days, I might have attempted this, but it would have taken me 7 or 8 hours to complete and I would have been exhausted and in pain for the next two days. Taking my time with breaks for snacks and water, I was finished with my wee jaunt in only 4 hours 😎 and really got to enjoy photographing some insects, fungi, and turtles.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Mr.Kantos

      Just signed up. Feeling optimistic.
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • Frugal

      Welcome to Frugal Testing, where we are committed to revolutionizing the software testing landscape with our efficient and affordable solutions. As a pioneering company in this field, we understand the challenges faced by startups, small to medium-sized businesses and any organization working without budget constraints. Our mission is to deliver top-notch testing services that ensure the highest quality of software, all while keeping your costs in check.
      Frugal Testing offers a comprehensive suite of testing services tailored to meet diverse needs. Specializing in different types of testing including functional testing, automation testing, metaverse testing and D365 testing, we cover all bases to guarantee thorough software quality assurance. Our approach is not just about identifying bugs; it's about ensuring a seamless and superior user experience.
      Innovation is at the heart of what we do. By integrating the latest tools and technologies, many of which are cutting-edge open source solutions, we stay ahead in delivering efficient and effective testing services. This approach allows us to provide exceptional quality testing without the high costs typically associated with advanced testing methodologies.
      Understanding each client's unique needs is fundamental to our service delivery. At Frugal Testing, the focus is on creating customized testing strategies that align with specific business goals and budget requirements. This client-centric approach ensures that every testing solution is not only effective but also fully aligned with the client's objectives.
      Our team is our greatest asset. Composed of skilled professionals who are experts in the latest testing techniques and technologies, they bring dedication, expertise and a commitment to excellence in every project. This expertise ensures that our client’s software not only meets but often exceeds the highest standards of quality and performance.
      Frugal Testing is more than just a service provider; we are a partner in your success. With a blend of quality, innovation and cost-effectiveness, we are here to help you navigate the complexities of software testing, ensuring your product stands out in today's competitive market. 
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
    • ChunkCat

      I have no clue where to upload this, so I'll put it here. This is pre-op vs the morning of my 6 month appointment! In office I weight 232, that's 88 lbs down since my highest weight, 75 lbs since my surgery weight! I can't believe this jacket fit... I am smaller now than the last time I was this size which the surgeon found really amusing. He's happy with where I am in my weight loss and estimates I'll be around 200 lbs by my 1 year anniversary! My lowest weight as an adult is 195, so that's pretty damn exciting to think I'll be near that at a year. Everything from there will be unknown territory!!

      · 3 replies
      1. AmberFL

        You look amazing!!! 😻 you have been killing it!

      2. NickelChip

        Congratulations! You're making excellent progress and looking amazing!

      3. BabySpoons

        So proud of you Cat. Getting into those smaller size clothes is half the fun isn't it?. Keep up the good work!!!!

    • BeanitoDiego

      I changed my profile image to a molecule of protein. Why? Because I am certain that it saved my life.
      · 1 reply
      1. BabySpoons

        That's brilliant! You've done amazing!! I should probably think about changing my profile picture at some point. Mine is the doll from Squid Games. Ironically the whole premise of the show is about dodging death. We've both done that...

  • Recent Topics

  • Hot Products

  • Sign Up For
    Our Newsletter

    Follow us for the latest news
    and special product offers!
  • Together, we have lost...
      lbs

    PatchAid Vitamin Patches

    ×