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Shrinking Violets -- April 07 Bandsters



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To say that I'm hurt is an understatement. Is anyone else having problems with their family? My surgery is scheduled for April 11th at 7:30 and I WILL be sucessful. I'm on sabbatical from school to lose weight and get bulimia off the list of coping mechanisms. Well I've worked my arse off these past 9 months and I'm done with bulimia. But I'm still obese and I've been fighting my weight since I was 9. I've been hiding food since I was six! Hiding food from my mom. She's a nutritionist/dietician so you'd think she'd realize that it is harder to lose weight when you're obese. It's just hard. I'm ready for this journey. I'm ready to work my band.

First - congrats on overcoming your bulimia. Second - yes I have issues with my family. Instead of wanting to deal with lectures and why's and my entire step family who are all perfect finding out, I am just not telling my dad - when infact I would really like to tell him. I am going to his house for dinner and debating what to do. Admitting in public, my weight issues started when I was 6 as well, and I have been fighting it every since -for the first 1/2 of my life i was told i was fat and ugly and for the last 10 years told i am beautiful. Why in the world would I believe that when the damage was done? I wonder why I stay to myself?

I guess my point is, I am jealous and wish i could mentally be at the point you are at with your mom, because I don't feel like I can even tell anyone else.

Congrats, You will do great, look at how far you got so far.

:clap2:

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Sheila: OK.. hun.. I'm 37 and this is the way I put it to my dad and step mom.. who DO NOT HAVE A CLUE what it is like to battle weight.

(Both were on the phone) I said, "I have something to tell you guys, and it is for INFORMATIONAL purposes ONLY, and IS NOT up for discussion or debate......"

They kind of laughed but knew I was serious, and they both congratulated me on the decision.

With my mom and step dad it was a little different because they BOTH NEED this surgery! They were more excited for me, but skeptical and a little apprehensive with discussing it with me because they felt like I was twisting their arm to have it done.. my mom flat out said that she would wait for me to have it and see how I do. My step dad said that he doesn't want to have any more surgeries.. (he's had back problems)

My skinny sis is excited and ready to take an ad out in the paper, but her best friend was questioning it (which is her nature)

Hell, even my buds over on Low Carb Friends are mostly against WLS in any form, but they are supporting me......... what it comes down to is this....

WE are responsible for our own weightloss journey... NO one else has to walk in our shoes with puffy swollen ankles, or squeeze their butts into our underwear... WE are the ones who make the decision, and it will be US next year on this board strutting our new smaller bods and encouraging the APRIL 08 bandsters!

I know you love your mom, and she loves you too... but remember she is human and she is your mom.... doesn't exactly make her an expert on wearing your underwear........... :(

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Sheila----We would all love to have everyones approval-Right???

Well consider the source---you are still her baby---she may not have the same issues with weight, and therefore does not share your perspective--she also is a pro-nutrtionist/dietician who probly thinks that diet and exercise are the only ways to go,On that, I do agree but I personally need more help than I have ever been able to provide myself.

As an adult we must make our own informed decisions, based on our own experiences, education, and individual needs physically and emotionally.---GOOD LUCK WITH GETTIN' MOM ON BOARD---just remember she needs you and loves you--right?

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WE are responsible for our own weightloss journey... NO one else has to walk in our shoes with puffy swollen ankles, or squeeze their butts into our underwear... WE are the ones who make the decision, and it will be US next year on this board strutting our new smaller bods and encouraging the APRIL 08 bandsters!

You are so great, I love reading your post -there is always something that makes me smile, even if it is something I can so relate to and hurts. I think i might tell my dad tonight. My mom is thrilled, my sister - who doesn't understand it and should do it herself - just recently decided to support me after explaining over and over - so what do i have to be afraid of. I'm just telling him.

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hey april bandsters!

My surgery got moved from march 26 to april 2 so that means another week of the pro op diet for me.. just wanted to wish everyone good luck on their up coming surgery.

I am having my surgery with Dr. Ortiz is anyone else out there having surgery with him as well?

I'm there on the 3rd of April.

OkTwigs

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You guys are the best. I'll write more this evening. But I needed to tell you just how much I appreciate your wisdom. I think the April bandsters are really becoming my surrogate family... the family who really understands. You guys are great and I'm incredibly grateful to have you all in my life.

With love, Sheila

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Hi Everyone!

Another weekend approaches, and March is speeding by FAST!! Not long now folks is it!

Mdrai, I think our confidence is going to soar, I already feel empowered if that makes sence knowing that we have all made the first step, I kinda feel proud that we all have the guts to admit that we needed help, and have seeked it, and know that this time next year we will be stunners!!!!

:welcome: Sfelizoo1 and Oktwiggs to the April 07 group were a real friendly bunch, and supportive with each other...there's quite a few of us having surgery on the 2nd/3rd April.....!! (2 weeks away! Aaaaaaaaa) :banana

Jennifur...WOW you have lost 26lbs already...That is AMAZING!!!!! You must be Soooooooo pleased....I am thinking of doing the Lighter life programme (I have sachets left from before) as from Monday, as I only have 2 weeks now, its getting a tad bit scary....

bwaydiva, well done for sticking to your own desicion, my mum was a bit unsure at first, now shes very supportive, as she knows what ever she says wont sway me! I'm sure things will work out, and I hope your mum comes round and gives you more support

Have a great weekend

Sara xx

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Is anyone else having problems with their family?

I have decided to NOT tell anyone in my family. Only my hubby knows. There aer people in my family with weight issues, but no one like me.

And almost everyone in my family, at one time or another over the years, has made a negative comment about WLS: easy way out; they'll eventually gain it all back; they must have no self-control; it's sad; lots of people die after that kind of surgery; and then whispering when they see someone who had it done. No thanks.

I just can't stand the thought of hearing everyone's "opinions" or trying to scare me into changing my mind- and then, even worse, having everyone watch everything I eat for the rest of my life.

But I do feel alone. Because I have decided not to tell family, I have also decided to not tell any friends, so that I don't have to keep up with who knows which story. Even though hubby is very supportive, I do feel like I need to talk about this with someone.

I sure am glad I found this board!!!!

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My mom gave me money for school and when I decided to take this year off, I just held onto it. Now I'm using that money, that should be going for school, for this surgery. I was going to have to account for the money eventually so I thought it would be better if she knew before hand rather than later. It's not really bravery on my part... I just thought it was the right thing to do. It had very little to do with her per se; it was more about my own need for personal clarity and integrity. I'm not putting anyone down!! I will not be telling my classmates or anyone like that. But I needed to tell her because she's family... That's all. Nothing brave.

Please understand that there is no point in me going to school if I don't lose the weight. I'm majoring in musical theatre at school. When I graduate from school, if I'm overweight I won't have a future or even the possibility of one in my chosen profession. I'm sick of playing fat girl roles and I'm ready to embrace my new future. If I don't lose the weight I'm not only going to be unhealthy but I'll be giving up my dreams as well. I refuse to let anyone... even my own mom... stand in the way of that.

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I have decided to NOT tell anyone in my family. Only my hubby knows. There aer people in my family with weight issues, but no one like me.

But I do feel alone. Because I have decided not to tell family, I have also decided to not tell any friends, so that I don't have to keep up with who knows which story. Even though hubby is very supportive, I do feel like I need to talk about this with someone.

I sure am glad I found this board!!!!

I am right there with you, I feel all alone too. My few friends who know are helping me with my kids, but I don't have a clue how i'm going to be in the hospital alone. My mom so desperately wants to be here but she is a nurse in AZ and is on a cancer retreat the week before and has to return to work. I am going to my dads right now and think i might tell him but I just don't know

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Sara-

It was a requirement by my surgeon to show you are willing to work. they like to make sure you are serious and ready to make the life changing commitment. I do feel great and I am sure if I was not always in last supper mode I would have lost more, but I am maintaing while waiting and I guess that is something I have learned and will help in the future when I lose a lot more!

It is nice I am down 2 sizes comfortably, I actually got my pants (2sizes smaller) zippered with no struggles *LOL* the other day, so i think the gym is working and my body is adjusting to what I've lost.

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:update:

Finally!!! After posting this afternoon depressed that I didn't have approval my Dr.'s off ice call me on my cell with the good news!! I'm approved.:clap2: I'll take my pre-op the last week of this month or the first week in April and have surgery the next week. Then on to a new lifestyle .

woohoo!!!!!!

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