For the last 12+ years I've desperately wanted and sought bariatric surgery. Now that I'm less than 30 days away from my dream coming true, I find myself full of fear and dread

Last week, I was approved for surgery and my wife was denied by the insurance company. We planned to do this together. Her surgery would have come only weeks after mine; now I'll be taking this journey alone. I know she'll be there to support me but somehow, it doesn't seem the same.

Logically, I know that I will come through this with flying colors. I completed the 4 month, supervised diet without a hitch. I surprised myself by losing 22 lbs. In 4 months I proved to myself that I could drastically change my eating habits and my lifestyle. I expect to have the same success in the months/years after the surgery.

The source of dread is the immediate aftermath of the surgery. I've never had major surgery before. I've never had a catheter and the thought of it makes this big manly-man want to run and hide. I've never been afraid of doctors, hospitals and needles but this is a whole different ball game. A few weeks ago, on YouTube, I watched a video of the procedure being performed; BIG MISTAKE!!!! Now, that the day is near, I can't stop thinking about how painful it will be when the meds wear off.

I'm assuming that my expectations of pain and suffering is greatly exaggerated. Can anyone help me set some reasonable expectations?

Thanks,

Treb

Good Morning Treb

We have the same surgery date! Go Team!

I have had like 15 major surgeries. So the recovery is not really worrying me too much. You will do fine. The pain meds are great. I recommend staying on top of taking them. Don't wait until they have completely worn off. If you do, it is much harder to get back on top of managing down the pain.

My biggest concern is the gas pain everyone talks about. I have never experienced that with any of my surgeries. This should be interesting.

The other thing that is hitting me right now is the reality of this is for LIFE. I have thought long and hard about my decision, and I know it is right for me and I can do this, but somehow there is that lingering "what if".

I also worry about the emotional roller coaster ride after the surgery. I have a great support system, but I don't look forward to this. I know this site will also be a great resource in my journey.

Let's do this!

Bonnie

I had the lap band in 2007 and was terrified! For my family and children mainly. But after I had the surgery, I had no pain where my incisions were and the day after I started having this enormous pressure in my shoulders. It's started to turn to stabbing pain. And it turned out it was all gas from surgery. I highly recommended you bringing gas x when you go. How many days are you staying in the hospital? I stayed 3 days and the kept me as drugged up as I needed to be. I was Abel to walk the same day of surgery and was pain free. But please bring the gas x. Hope this helps.

Thanks for the replys! I didn't know the gas issue could be so huge. I'll bring plenty of GasX.

I didn't have much pain after the surgery. Immediately after, the only thing that really bothered me was the gas pain, and I was able to get rid of that fairly quickly by walking. Seriously, I've had menstrual cramps that were worse than my post-surgery pain (not that you can relate directly to that, but . . .). I did have some lingering pain at my drain site but that was taken care of with pain meds and bracing myself when doing things like sitting down or standing up. Some people have more pain, some less, but just make sure you take your pain meds and you should be just fine.

oh and with respect to Gas-X - bring it, but be prepared for it not to work as well as walking does. My nurse explained to me that Gas-X works on gas that is within the digestive tract, but most of your post-surgery gas is outside of the digestive tract and in the general body cavity. At my hospital they wouldn't even let me try Gas-X because they think it interferes with normal gas in the digestive tract, and they want that gas to keep moving as it should. It's important that they know when you pass gas from your digestive tract after surgery -- that means you are healing well and your digestive tract isn't stopped or twisted up or something. I think my hospital's policy is not the norm but some others do it too. Just keep walking, regardless! Even if you are not walking, try to be sitting up rather than lying down. If you have a rocker or glider in your room, sit in that and keep moving! That's the most important thing in getting rid of gas.

It seems everyone's experience with pain is so different. I had bad pain when I woke up. Had no gas pain just pain everywhere. I am older, 66, and the dr had to go thru some very old scar tissue that the surgery took an extra 20 min. I was really shocked to be in so much pain because I figure with 5 tiny incisions it would be nothing. But I was not as lucky as some. Whatever it is it gets better everyday and only lasts about a week. Best of luck to you and don't think about this part, think of the overall picture of what you want to accomplish.

I had little discomfort and NO catheter... And I bet your wife will be approved on appeal. Press forward!

My doctor didn't put a catheter in me. I was worried they would but they just didn't.

Actually, while you're in the hospital and on meds the pain isn't that bad. It's when they take you off the morphine and send you home that hell week (and yes, it is called hell week) starts.

But you'll get through it. You just have to learn to adapt to the new normal in your life.

I think it depends on your pain tolerance. I read many post before my surgery and I got the impression I would not be in a lot of pain. I also have had a couple of surgeries many years ago and only remembered the discomfort of the gas pains. However, although I was on the pain pump in the hospital the pain was extreme to me, from the right side of my belly and the terrible gas. The walking did not help my gas pains, but many have posted that it helped theirs. My husband is a nurse and prompted me to continue to walk anyways to prevent blood clots, so I walked. I started taking the gas x strips on the 3 day after surgery and begun getting relief the following day. I hope you fall into the category with minimal pain. Whatever, the pain I know it is temporary and I would have the surgery again! I am 11 days post surgery.

I guess its time I put on my big-boy pants! Thanks for all your support!!!!

I guess its time I put on my big-boy pants! Thanks for all your support!!!!

I think you will be fine. Please don't be shy about pain management. My doctor put me on a fentanyl (sp?) drip after surgery. It knocked me out with delivery of each dose but did little for pain while I was conscious. I mention it to my nurses and they told me there was a Tylenol/Motrin-like combo that was available to me. It was wonderful. I got right out of bed and walked the halls for ~ 20 minutes. My pain was nearly gone. I think good pain management is a big part of rapid healing. Be sure to speak up to your nursing staff. They can be your best friends after surgery. Good luck!

For the last 12+ years I've desperately wanted and sought bariatric surgery. Now that I'm less than 30 days away from my dream coming true' date=' I find myself full of fear and dread Last week, I was approved for surgery and my wife was denied by the insurance company. We planned to do this together. Her surgery would have come only weeks after mine; now I'll be taking this journey alone. I know she'll be there to support me but somehow, it doesn't seem the same. Logically, I know that I will come through this with flying colors. I completed the 4 month, supervised diet without a hitch. I surprised myself by losing 22 lbs. In 4 months I proved to myself that I could drastically change my eating habits and my lifestyle. I expect to have the same success in the months/years after the surgery. The source of dread is the immediate aftermath of the surgery. I've never had major surgery before. I've never had a catheter and the thought of it makes this big manly-man want to run and hide. I've never been afraid of doctors, hospitals and needles but this is a whole different ball game. A few weeks ago, on YouTube, I watched a video of the procedure being performed; BIG MISTAKE!!!! Now, that the day is near, I can't stop thinking about how painful it will be when the meds wear off. I'm assuming that my expectations of pain and suffering is greatly exaggerated. Can anyone help me set some reasonable expectations? Thanks, Treb[/quote']

First, take a deep breath – and do it a few more times… Believe or not, it actually helps. I know it's a scary thing – I just went through it. I considered bariatric surgery for nearly 10 years and I could never follow through. But, I finally bit the bullet and got it. It would be easier to have the partnership with your wife – is there any chance you can appeal the decision? It doesn't hurt to try.

As far as surgeries are concerned, I've had 20 myself. I used to be able to handle them like it was nothing. But the more that I had, the more that it would get to me. Honestly, I started having anxiety attacks before having my sleeve but, I so very happy that I still did it. Your doctor should take care of as far pain is concerned. If your pain is not controlled, then tell them – sometimes you have to tell them more than once.

In my opinion, it hurts but I've dealt with much more pain. The incisions are small and honestly, the only pain that I deal with from this surgery has more to deal with getting acclimated to the new stomach. The surgery is more of an adjustment than anything else – having to follow the diet and things of that nature. While following a diet may not be difficult for you and the sense of having the ability to adhere to it, it still takes planning and paying attention to the little nuances of it all.

You shouldn't even fill the catheter. To my knowledge they put it in after they put you to sleep and they take it out before you wake up – you should be okay. One of my favorite sayings is by pres. Franklin Roosevelt – "there's nothing to fear but fear itself."

You can do it :-)