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My old self came out yesterday



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I was having head hunger all day yesterday. About noon I gave up the fight and told myself to just do what you want to the rest of the day, and get it out of your system. The result of that decision was by 5 or 6 I was tired, grumpy, no energy, and sitting on the sofa eating goldfish ( I dont even really love goldfish, I mean theyre OK, but I dont love them). The old me really came out yesterday, and I did not like it! My 12 year old said, "Mom whats wrong with you"? Yes, a 12 year old noticed the mood change due to food before I did. It reminded me how good I am at ignoring myself. One good thing did come out of yesterday though, I got a glimpse of my past, and without a doubt can say "I WILL NOT GO BACK". I can't believe I used to be that miserable most of the time. I homeschool my 4 kids, and I don't think I have adjusted well to the schedule changes we have instituted in the past couple of weeks. Did I mention in the past couple of weeks I have only went to the gym once or twice a week? So, today is a new day. Ive got a great eating plan for today. I am going shopping later so I can be prepared for myself, because the last time I shopped I really think I had my family in mind and not myself. Lastly, I will go to the gym today and WORK! I'm looking forward to today and reaquainting myself with the new me!

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You are doing great! Recognizing the old pattern is HUGE! By all means put your own well-being in the forefront! That's why you had the surgery! You can't effectively care for your family if you are not taking care of your self.

pre-surgery weight 325; surgery date 2/28/2013; surgery weight 307; 8 weeks past-op weight 281.4; 12 weeks post-op 274; 4 month post-op 266.2; 5 month post-op 262.6

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Then you learned a lot! I have discovered that me and simple carbs are NOT friends. They are like nicotine to me... Best if I just keep away altogether!

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thought i was the only one yesterday i caved half Peanut Butter jelly later one pc pizza sum pita bits and a waffle cone from wendys not very happy with myself feel like a failure...and did i say im only four weeks out...

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thought i was the only one yesterday i caved half Peanut Butter jelly later one pc pizza sum pita bits and a waffle cone from wendys not very happy with myself feel like a failure...and did i say im only four weeks out...

I remember about 4 weeks out when I was allowed to eat a little more I went crazy for a couple of days. Then reeled it in got back to basics (3 shakes a day sensible dinner) and then proceeded to loose 35 lb over the next 2 months. It just goes to show we can all fall off the wagon, its whether or not you get back on track that matters. My slippery slope seems to be a giant drop off cliff!

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I remember about 4 weeks out when I was allowed to eat a little more I went crazy for a couple of days. Then reeled it in got back to basics (3 shakes a day sensible dinner) and then proceeded to loose 35 lb over the next 2 months. It just goes to show we can all fall off the wagon, its whether or not you get back on track that matters. My slippery slope seems to be a giant drop off cliff!

i think this is the hardest thing mentally i have ever had to do.. i scared im gonna fail and the sleeve wont work...

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"my slippery slope is a giant drop-off"

yeppers, it is HARD... but better than the alternative...

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Yeah, last night I succumbed to eating about 5 bites of ice cream. I'm 5 weeks out and on soft foods. Regretting it this morning with an upset tummy.

This surgery isn't for the faint of heart!

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I did awesome today, and had endless energy. 104g of protien, 60g of carbs, and 937 calories! Yea Baby!

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    • LeighaTR

      I am new here today... and only two weeks out from my sleeve surgery on the 23rd. I am amazed I have kept my calories down to 467 today so far... that leaves me almost 750 left for dinner and maybe a snack. This is going to be tough for two weeks... but I have to believe I can do it!
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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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