Negative Boyfriend

[NancyDec20 212]

This is just my opinion ok... Keep the bathing suit cuz you look fab. lose the boyfriend. you deserve someone better than that.. you need someone positive.. and keep up the great work... he is just jealous cuz you are fabulous.

[rybecca20 160]

Girl you look so cute!!! There area many out there that will appreciate you hon just keep working it.

[johnlatte 1,232]

You look great, your bf need a warm glass of shut the hell up!

[Roserie 303]

I think you look great a and if he can't see that then maybe you should find someone who will be behind you supporting you 100%.

[FeeIsMe2 508]

I agree with the other posters time to dump the loser! You are too young, and too cute to be in a bad relationship!

[lilbearzmom 584]

Oh guys, I am just ready to rip my boyfriends head off. We have been together for a little over two years now and I've always been extremely overweight my entire life. Well now I'm 3 months post op and almost 60 pounds down and I feel great! I work out every single day, can finally start dressing more age appropriate, and am finally finding some confidence that I've never had. And I hate to say it, but I think my boyfriend hates the idea of me feeling better about myself. He's been 100% against WLS from the start and always making remarks about how if I really wanted it bad enough I'd be able to do it without the sleeve! And now yesterday I went bathing suit shopping and was THRILLED that I could fit into a normal bathing suit (i don't think I've worn one since a infant) so I sent him a picture and be says to me "You know, I have to be honest, you've really let yourself go. You don't take care of yourself like you used to." WHAT?! This is the first time in my life that I actually am taking care of myself! This really hurt my feelings and I just can't shake it. I know this is kind of just a rant and I really appreciate having this forum to vent these issues too. Has anyone else had this kind of reaction from a loved one? I think it might be time to send him to the curb..... Here's the picture I sent him BTW Starting weight 262, current weight 206

OMG, you look great! You should have dumped him a long time ago, I think. The text he sent you is unreal. Definitely show him the curb! Keep us updated!

-Kendra

[BeatrizS1974<3 sleeve 94]

Keep the bathing suit lose the bf! Sometimes when we are down with ourselves we make bad choices and then one day we wake up and realize it. I think you are just waking up and realizing that what was good for you 2 years ago is not what is good for you now!

You look great! GL!

[Dreamingofhealth 223]

I think you need to talk to him and tell him how that comment really made you feel. If he can't have a decent conversation and own up to his feelings, and explain to you what's going on in his mind- THEN it's time to jump ship!

My hubby and I have a pretty good relationship (we better after 12 years), but he made some comments to me that I felt were rude and unnecessary. I'm still Pre-sleeve. He said 'after you get all skinny and hotter, your just going to leave me for someone better'. This really pissed me off because he's basically calling me shallow, and he feels threatened. Honestly, how could I leave someone who has treated me like a princess and loved me for me UNCONDITIONALLY not even 'seeing' these 280 pounds!? So I didn't know where this came from.

But after we talked he let out all his feelings, and it came down to two things. He's scared I'll have complications and he's scared he's going to lose his best friend. :-(

So after the novel I just wrote, talk to him and see where he's at. You never know what he's feeling.

BUT please know that you are a young beautiful woman and deserve WAY better than someone who says rude things to the one he's supposed to love no matter what. And in no way do you have to put up with that because there is a man waiting to love YOU for YOU!!! :-)

Ps. That bathing suit is super cute!

Sheena :-)

[kathyhalls 17]

Lose the bf if you're surrounded by negative people it can cause you to go back to the habits that made you gain weight in the first place. Eat feelings. I would also tell him treat me with such disrespect bet your parents are proud their adult son is still a child. I am sorry you had to go through this. You look amazing. I had to drop some close friends because of their jealousy and I haven't even started losing significant amounts of weight. He is being negative to bring you down so you will never think you're good enough to find another guy. You are better that this. You are taking you're life back and I congradulate you on your success. Confidence is key, once you have enough no one can touch you!

[newat52 1,613]

This is just my opinion ok... Keep the bathing suit cuz you look fab. lose the boyfriend. you deserve someone better than that.. you need someone positive.. and keep up the great work... he is just jealous cuz you are fabulous.

I couldn't have said it any better!

[abetterme4.2 268]

WTF?

"You've let yourself go?"

Well, with ****-for-brains-boyfriend like that, I can see why he would think so. Obviously his input shouldn't matter much, you had the surgery withOUT his approval. And that's permanent and irreversible. Now, tell me, why should a stupid ass comment about a swimsuit make much difference to you?

Because you've worked hard and wanted validation from someone you care about.

Obviously, he doesn't feel the same.

Now kick his ass to the curb and work that swimsuit. Someone else with some common-ass courtesy will appreciate you more. I promise.

[Nicolanz 1,484]

First of all, you're gorgeous! How wonderful it is that YOU ARE taking care of yourself! You've done amazing in just a few months! I'd have a long talk with Mr. Negative and let him know he won't bring you down. He's either with you or out the damn door. Don't let him sabotage you! I can't believe he said that! He needs to be excited for you. Good luck!

[marielalovesherfamily03 6]

Oh guys' date=' I am just ready to rip my boyfriends head off. We have been together for a little over two years now and I've always been extremely overweight my entire life. Well now I'm 3 months post op and almost 60 pounds down and I feel great! I work out every single day, can finally start dressing more age appropriate, and am finally finding some confidence that I've never had. And I hate to say it, but I think my boyfriend hates the idea of me feeling better about myself. He's been 100% against WLS from the start and always making remarks about how if I really wanted it bad enough I'd be able to do it without the sleeve! And now yesterday I went bathing suit shopping and was THRILLED that I could fit into a normal bathing suit (i don't think I've worn one since a infant) so I sent him a picture and be says to me "You know, I have to be honest, you've really let yourself go. You don't take care of yourself like you used to." WHAT?! This is the first time in my life that I actually am taking care of myself! This really hurt my feelings and I just can't shake it. I know this is kind of just a rant and I really appreciate having this forum to vent these issues too. Has anyone else had this kind of reaction from a loved one? I think it might be time to send him to the curb..... Here's the picture I sent him BTW Starting weight 262, current weight 206

[/quote']

You look amazibg.

[angelbabys 6]

Amanda you look just lovely. Don't let the boyfriend bother you. He is obviously insecure about your weight loss. Judging from the picture I don't think you'd have any problem getting a new' date=' improved boyfriend. My youngest child hasn't been to thrilled with my decision. It's just the adjustment from seeing Mom in one way his whole life and now he knows I will look different.

You stand your ground. If your bf doesn't like it, then he can go find himself another fat chick and you can move along to a new bf. Trade up![/quote']

I think you are on the right track and building your confidence, this is a hard journey for us and we need people to help hold us up not push us down. My opinion is its time to sit him down and tell him his negativity is unacceptable and either he supports you the right way or he moves on somewhere else, because a relationship is all about supporting each other through good and bad. Good luck sweety and please don't let his negativity stop you from the new you.

[No game 14,437]

What he said was not only false (as you know)

It was meant to be cruel.. I think there is a difference between being a little insecure and saying things like "I bet when you lose the weight you will leave me" and those cruel mind blowing words he said... Please take care of yourself and know you deserve so much better.

Laura