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A thread for Single Bandsters



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Ok, so i know im losing weight and becoming happy with the wy i look and the way i feel but i still have the whole shy issue?!?!?!

So im 22 almost 23 and have never really had a boyfriend... Some of the reasons are that: i am extremely shy, have always been overweight, and went to an all girls high school....

I definately know if i just wasn't so shy i'd be better off...

Any advice on how i can get over this????

(And i kind of feel like im just about the oldest person who hasnt had a boyfriend)

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Dibaby I couldn't find your profile on POF. I did a username search, and nothing came up.

I'm a dork...its Dibaby36..lol..Dibaby37 is myspace..LOL

Yeah I thought about adding who I'm looking for Manatee..I think about it a bit more..thanks for the feed back ;)

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Dibaby will you take a look at mine?

Okay I looked it over. I like it. The only thing I think that might be turning people off is that you did just put "friends". I know you stated why in your profile but alot of people just scan. They won't even read your profile if they see "friends". I really think you should put "dating". Just my opinion. Also put more pictures! Guys are really visual creatures and need to know what u really look like before they will talk to you. Also make sure to put a full body shot..I know..it's hard..but you have to. It's only fair.

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Denise, yours looks fine, but I would put in more photos if I were you, and maybe something about who you're looking for

Di, again, there's nothing there about who you're looking for. Good photos. On the profile review I was told to remove my paragraph about losing weight so I did -- maybe that works better on a female's profile?

I know my profile is long, but it started short and I kept expanding it as I had more and more disappointing conversations. I figure that if someone reads that and still contacts me, she has a good feel for who I am.

As far as body type, that's just what I feel. Doing better, yeah, but still got a big spare tire and a convex shape. You all know how the right clothes and angles can hide things in a photo! When I hit my goal, I'll change it to average. If I can ever see my abs, I'll change it to athletic :)

I forgot to mention about the weight loss statement I have in my profile. Actually it has worked for me I believe. Guys like it that I am goal oriented and stuff it seems. Also for woman weight is a HUGEEE issue. I wanted to be crystal clear without any confusion as to what my body looks like. I hear that alot from guys that women are not honest about their looks so I'm really trying to be. Thanks hon for the feedback..your fabulous ;)

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Dibaby - I was being nosy and looking at your pof profile. Just wanted to tell you you are STUNNING!!! Congrats on the weight loss!

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Okay, Dibaby, I changed my profile to dating and took out the part about friends. I seriously doubt that it will make much difference. I have used yahoo personals and match.com and can never get anyone to answer my emails. It makes me feel pretty

crumby. Guys my age want women as young as possible.

I wish I knew where to meet people in my age group IRL.

I am going to get more pictures as soon as I can. I need to get together with my friend and go out and take a bunch and find one I can live with. She has been really busy lately because she is self employed and her it's her busy time right now. My daughter took some and they look like cr@p so I think my friend is better at taking pictures.

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lol! let me tell you my stupid story....

So I was using True.com to meet someone, well...I DID! A great guy, good-looking, tall, sweet. But After 2 dates I ran off and started dating my ex-fiance!! I wonder what life would have been like had I stayed with the other guy. He was so nice it scared me, especially since I met him on the internet. Im really paranoid about all that. I cant believe I let that hinder me! I mean, I left a great guy for a visible a-hole!

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Dibaby - I was being nosy and looking at your pof profile. Just wanted to tell you you are STUNNING!!! Congrats on the weight loss!

Thanks so much! :)

You look marvelous too :Banane42:

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I've met a couple guys from online dating sites. The first guy I met online was from americansingles.com. This was a few years ago. We hit it off well...and continued dating for a few months. He had to move because of his job, and I wasn't into the long distance thing. We both went our separate ways...and just recently (September) started talking again because he's moved back in town. We met up for drinks a couple of times...and then he had me over to his place a few times for some games and hanging out. I just went there this past weekend and had one of the *best* times with him...which did NOT include sex. That was awesome....I'm totally fallin' for him again. He liked me when I was my biggest, and seems to continue liking me....I'm not going to give my hopes up on this....but I'm curious to see where it's going to go. If anything...it's a nice step back out into the dating world!

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Well, I got a number of a friend-of-a-friend, and after the initial "who are you and why are you calling me?" stumble we had a fun multi-hour conversation yesterday. Being the idiot I am, I forgot to actually ask her out at the end of the call. So, I suppose I need to call her back soon.

What's the rules on this these days? I don't want to seem like a stalker. (dang, I'm actually asking this question. I'm lame....)

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Hi, my name is Laura. Live in Northern Virginia with a neurotic cat and work in DC. I was banded Oct 3. I gained a lot of weight during chemotherapy and later radiation. I date some, but don't want to get into another serious relationship because my last 2 went to Iraq and Afganistan and didn't return. (I go in and out of Quantico every day) So I decided I couldn't stand the emotional stress anymore. Maybe later. The guys I date have never said anything about my weight. They compliment me on how "nice" I look if we are going somewhere special. Otherwise, I've never had a problem. I belong to several car clubs and most everyone is a couple. It is a little odd, not being part of a couple any longer, but I figure I will eventually work it out. I'm glad to see this thread, as singles we probably will have a different outlook on our surgery and the ultimate (good!) results. Laura

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I've been wondering lately what's going to happen when I go out with a new guy and food possibly gets stuck. Won't he wonder why I have to run to the restroom twenty times? Also, how far into talking do you tell them? So far, I've been too scared to go on a restaurant date. I've been meeting at coffee shops and jazz cafes - lol. Any suggestions?

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So far, both of the guys that showed interest in me (including Nate)....I've told about the band. Both seemed rather interested and intrigued about the band. I guess it just depends. I figured that I'll be upfront with everything. Either they like me, or they don't!

I read a book called "He's Just Not That Into You"....and it made everything make so much more sense!

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Galati25:

When I go out to a resturant, I usually order from the appititizer menu, usually that is a pretty good meal. If anyone says anything like, is that all you want, I just tell them I am cutting back and look how it is helping your pocketbook! That always gets a laugh, and we're both more comfortable. I've found that eating slowly works out ok because they are eating a full meal while I have my small one, so we finish up about the same time. Laura

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