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Food Has Always Been There For Me (Nervous)



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It's as the title says I'm nervous. My surgury is sept 19th. And I'm trying to talk myself out of it. I have always used food as a comfort. I've always told people I eat if I'm depressed and I eat if I'm happy. Stressed etc. I'm scared that I will have trouble dealing with issues in life if I can't turn to food. Addiction runs on my mothers side of the family. I've never smoked drank or did drugs and do ever seeing me do it but without food there I'm not sure how things will go. When my mother passed away I gained almost 75lbs. I know if I don't do something I'm going to die at a young age. But I'm really scared of never getting the same comfort I have for years. I've lost 27lbs on my pre op so far and 12lbs before that I was at a peak of 352lbs at 5'10" I'm now 315lbs. And feel better and know I'll feel even better if I lose more. But I'm really scared of life after surgury. Has anyone been through this?

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Hey, the only time I don't eat is when I'm sad. Mad is the worst for me...I punish myself by over-eating. Sad or depressed, I find I do other crazy things like drastically cutting my hair or binge shopping without money (don't ask).

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We are at similar starting numbers and yes - even after two years of compulsive overeating counseling, I can totally identify with you. I started my preop liquid diet today, and even though I don't feel hungry, I totally miss food. I have been thinking - wow, I'll never eat a big meal again! Which is absolutely the point, but how I have been caring for myself (in a wrong way) for so long. I too have to figure out how I will cope.

Congratulations on your success so far!

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I'm finding that a tough one. I'm trying to lose a manditory 15 pounds so my surgery will be scheduled and as a result, drinking most of my meals. Just last night I sat sobbing 'I just want to eat!'

food has always been there for me. But it's such a bad relationship. Drive thrus are my dealers! It's how I numb my feelings. We need to deal with our feelings and learn how to really feel again. A lot like other addicts trying to recover.

We can do it. Exercise even if you hate it, punching bag, artwork (I have some of the angriest art around), scream in a pillow. Heck, I have a friend who has a 'stress altar '. She buys dishes in garage sales then when she's furious & needs relief, she heads out to the stress altar to smash some plates.

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My surgery was August21st. That was my biggest concern. Because you are getting rid of the ghrelin hormone, you will feel differently, and just plain will not be able to use food for emotional reasons. Yay! Try to find some fun things to do instead. I only had to do two days pre-op liquid and I was dying. I really feel for you. It will pass, I promise!

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Dexter, I go to those dealers too ;). We have to find healthy substitutes which sure won't be easy. I quit smoking cold turkey, but you can't just quit eating.

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It takes some getting used to, but we are more resiliant than we think we are and you can work through your feelings. I had a few crying jags since I started this journey, but the feelings pass. Allow yourself to experience the feelings and then move on.

At 5 months out I have a different relationship with food, it doesn't do that much for me. Its like the wiring gets changed and that is fine with me because it used to be that I looked forward to eating way too much but physically I was feeling so unhealthy, and I would cry feeling sorry for myself wondering if I would ever not be the fattest girl in the room. I would watch The Biggest Loser wishing that dream would come true for me.

When I finally looked into WLS I found the hope I needed and committed to the program right away. I have not regretted the choice not once.

My little tummy gets full fast but I still enjoy lots of foods, and if I get moments of sadness, I reflect and feel the feelings, then let something else enter my mind and move on. Its always fleeting now.

Good luck to all of you, I bet you'll all end up feeling like me that it was worth it.

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I had a friend tell me recently "no food taste as good as skinny feels" it has become my mantra when I get nervous about my surgery (which is Sept 25). Take a picture of yourself before your surgery and stick on the fridge and in the pantry!! When you think about food take 10 deep breaths. The psychologist said that oxygen releases the same endorphines as eating does. Try journaling or the punching bag, breaking old dishes thing was great!! Remember just because addiction runs in your family doesn't mean you have to go down that path. You are stronger than you think! Just look you took the step to change your life forever in a positive way!! Good luck!!

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So glad someone started this topic...The title is exactly how I feel too. My surgery is scheduled for the 26th and I'm nervous. I'd really like to hear from those of you who have had and are now living with the sleeve. What's life like? How do you feel (mentally and physically). Do you have excessive vomiting, diahrrea, gagging? Have you been able to retain your sanity morphing from a co-dependent relationship with food to a new healthy enounter? Please share, advise and respond :) THANK YOU

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    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

    • CaseyP1011

      Officially here for a long time, not just a good time💪
      · 0 replies
      1. This update has no replies.
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