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It's not like I won't tell someone if they asked me. I have and I am fine with that if 2 of my coworkers are gettin it also because of me I just don't like the fact of people putting my stuff out there for all to see it should be MY choice of who I want to tell

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You do know that you can delete a message on your FB page. I would have done that ASAP!

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I just deativated my FB account for several reasons, but one was to have some privacy during "my" time. I have been known to delete people at the drop of dime that don't me anything to me and the only reason we are connected is because of the internet. People use FB as a forum for things I do not think it was meant to be. I really don't need someone from high school up in my business that I haven't seen since 1993.....

Any who, enough about my FB rant, but I would DELETE her azz......

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I just deativated my FB account for several reasons' date=' but one was to have some privacy during "my" time. ......[/quote']

Why don't you just not log in? What's the difference?

My FB never has pictures of me nowadays, so nothing lost on that end. I AM looking foward to a picture of me with my little kids where I don't look like Shrek next to them!!

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Why don't you just not log in? What's the difference?

My FB never has pictures of me nowadays' date=' so nothing lost on that end. I AM looking foward to a picture of me with my little kids where I don't look like Shrek next to them!!

[/quote']

That is exactly why I canceled my FB. I don't want them storing my personal info, I don't want them selling my statistics & my pics to anybody. Read their terms of service, anything you put on FB becomes their property to do with as they please. If they choose to make all your private info public, they can and you have no recourse.

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As I stated early it is not the only reason I deactivated. OTR Sleever makes very good points. Honestly I am just sick of Facebook, it takes the personal feeling from relationships. And then like OP's issue every now and then u have someone post or say something that is not appropriate. I don't believe facebook is a great forum to debate political and religious views. I have seen enough posts in the past month about Chick-fil-a and Gaby Douglas. So yes, I deactivated then no one can even see my page.

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You know, I have a different take on this. Yes you should be upset with your friend if you specifically told her not to tell anyone else, but I wonder what kind of friend you andnshenare when you discuss her as jealous. I can't say that anyone in my circle of close friends feels jealousy for me, nor me them and I never have. So perhaps you told someone you don't like much and then expected them to keep a secret? You will also tell office staff...anyone you tell will mention it likely. So what? Own your choice and when you see a genuine compliment as you did, say thank you and move on. I think the focus to be concerned about is your reaction at this point so that this does not repeat itself over and over in your mind.

What you did isn't easy, understand that and that people who haven't gone through your experience are not going to understand that. If I had a dime for every time someone thinks my life is easy because I live in a big house or whatever....well I could have paid for two sleeves :P. big house, small house, big stomach, small stomach, we all have our challenges in life. But rarely does anyone who isn't living them understand. That's human nature, not bitterness or jealousy. Take that word out of your vocabulary and close your fb account. Your life will be the better for it! And congrats on your healthy recovery....and weight loss!

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I have heard this before, but without exception all that I've shared this process with have been supportive. Just my two cents here but anyone who isn't supportive, may not be a very good friend for you during this change. When/If I find someone with that attitude, I'll note their attitude and move on (to better friends).

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Ah yes--Facebook. I had a personal account that i was using but didn't like bitchy old high school friends looking me up and making judgements on my life lol. I just got sick and tired of it and really didn't see much benefit in it. If I want to talk to a friend, I'll text them or call them or email them. Facebook is way too involved for my liking. I do have an incognito FB account that I log into where I only add friends who play Cafe World with me lol. No personal involvement and I like it like that. It's just not my cup of tea. I am a private person so I just really felt like it wasn't "for me" in that way for friends and family. I am just that way

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I'm only telling a couple of ppl before I have the surgery. But I know ppl will notice my weight loss & I've decided I will tell ppl the truth if they ask, and if they judge me that's their problem, not mine.

I do think that the more that ppl choose to not tell - the more we stigmatize WLS and perpetuate the perception that WLS is bad and something to be ashamed of though.

You are right though - it was definitely your decision to make whether you put it out there or not - I certainly don't plan on announcing it on FB (at least not until I get to goal, if then).

That woman definitley is jealous. It would have been great though if you'd responded in kind - like yeah my surgery went really well and as you can see I'm already down 43 pounds. How's your diet going?

:o:D

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    • Doughgurl

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      · 1 reply
      1. Phil Penn

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    • Doughgurl

      Hey everyone. I'm new here so I thought I should introduce myself. I am 53y/o and am scheduled for Gastric Bypass on June 25th, 2025. I'm located in San Antonio, Texas. I will be having my surgery in Tiajuana Mexico. I've wanted this for years, but I always had insurance where bariatric procedures were excluded. Finally I am able to afford to pay out of pocket.  I can't wait to get started, and I hope I'm prepared for the initial period of "hell". I know what I have signed up for, but I'm sure the good to come will out way the temporary period of discomfort and feelings of regret. I'd love to find people to talk to who have been through the same procedure or experience before. So I look forward to meeting you all. Hope you have a great week!
      · 2 replies
      1. Selina333

        I'm so happy for you! You are about to change your life. I was so glad to get the sleeve done in Dec. I didn't have feelings of regret overall. And I'm down almost 60 lbs. I do feel a little sad at restaurants. I can barely eat half a kid's meal. I get adults meals often because kid ones don't have the same offerings at times. Then I feel obligated to eat on that until it's gone and that can be days. So the restaurant thing isn't great for me. All the rest is fine by me! I love feeling full with very little. I do wish I could drink when eating. And will sip at the end. Just a strong habit to stop. But I'm working on it! You will do fine! Just keep focused on your desire to be different. Not better or worse. But different. I am happy both ways but my low back doesn't like me that heavy. So I listened (also my feet!). LOL! Update us on your journey! I'm not far from you. I'm in Houston. Good luck and I hope it all goes smoothly! Would love to see pics of the town you go to for this. I've never been there. Neat you will be traveling for this! Enjoy the journey. Take it one day at a time. Sometimes a few hours at a time. Follow all recommendations as best you can. 💗

      2. Doughgurl

        Thank you so much for your well wishes. I am hoping that everything goes easy for me as well. We don't eat out much as it is, so it wont be too bad in that department. Thankfully. Also, I hear you regarding your back and feet!! I'd like to add knees to the list. Killing me as we speak! I'm only 5' so the weight has to go. Too short to carry all this weight. Menopause really did a doosey on me. (😶lol) My daughter also lives in Houston. with her Husband and my 5 grand-littles. I grew up in Beaumont, so I know Houston well, I will be sure to keep in touch and update you on my journey. I may need some advice in the future, or just motivation. Thank You so much for reaching out, I was hoping to connect with someone in the community. I really appreciate it. 💜

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. LeighaTR

        I hope your surgery on Wednesday goes well. You will be able to do all sorts of new things as you find your new normal after surgery. I don't know this from experience yet, but I am seeing a lot of positive things from people who have had it done. Best of luck!

    • Alisa_S

      On day 4 of the 2 week liquid pre-op diet. Surgery scheduled for June 11th.
      Soooo I am coming to a realization
      of something and I'm not sure what to do about it. For years the only thing I've enjoyed is eating. We rarely do anything or go anywhere and if we do it always includes food. Family comes over? Big family dinner! Go camping? Food! Take a short ride or trip? Food! Holiday? Food! Go out of town for a Dr appointment? Food! When we go to a new town we don't look for any attractions, we look for restaurants we haven't been to. Heck, I look forward to getting off work because that means it's almost supper time. Now that I'm drinking these pre-op shakes for breakfast, lunch, and supper I have nothing to look forward to.  And once I have surgery on June 11th it'll be more of the same shakes. Even after pureed stage, soft food stage, and finally regular food stage, it's going to be a drastic change for the rest of my life. I'm giving up the one thing that really brings me joy. Eating. How do you cope with that? What do you do to fill that void? Wow. Now I'm sad.
      · 1 reply
      1. summerseeker

        Life as a big person had limited my life to what I knew I could manage to do each day. That was eat. I hadn't anything else to look forward to. So my eating choices were the best I could dream up. I planned the cooking in managable lots in my head and filled my day with and around it.

        Now I have a whole new big, bigger, biggest, best days ever. I am out there with those skinny people doing stuff i could never have dreamt of. Food is now an after thought. It doesn't consume my day. I still enjoy the good home cooked food but I eat smaller portions. I leave food on my plate when I am full. I can no longer hear my mother's voice saying eat it all up, ther are starving children in Africa who would want that!

        I still cook for family feasts, I love cooking. I still do holidays but I have changed from the All inclusive drinking and eating everything everyday kind to Self catering accommodation. This gives me the choice of cooking or eating out as I choose. I rarely drink anymore as I usually travel alone now and I feel I need to keep aware of my surroundings.

        I don't know at what point my life expanded, was it when I lost 100 pounds? Was it when I left my walking stick at home ? Was it when I said yes to an outing instead of finding an excuse to stay home ? i look back at my last five years and wonder how loosing weight has made such a difference. Be ready to amaze yourself.

        BTW, the liquid diet sucks, one more day and you are over the worst. You can do it.

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