Hey there, well i'm getting all my pre op stuff out of the way for surgery, and i haven't told my dad or sister, just my mom and one of my friends. I don't really want to tell anyone, not because i'm ashamed just because i don't want to be the poster child for wls. i feel like my sis and dad are very judgemental but people are eventually going to notice me not eating that much sooner or later. What do you guys think i should do? I was thinking about telling people im getting back surgery because technically this is for my back pain mostly but then again maybe i just shouldnt say anything at all? I feel like most people have the wrong idea about wls and are too quick to judge. Were you guys open or secretive about your surgery

thanks for all your opinions you guys, i think i finally made my decision, I'll tell my two best friends, and if someone who i really trust asks me ill also tell them. Other people ill just say i went on a medically induced diet which is not a lie. I know I have to tell me father because I am under 18 (im 16) but i'll only tell him when i get my surgery date, even if he doesn't agree with me, he can't stop me, my parents are divorced and my moms the one who has insurance for me. I won't tell him what hospital its at or w/e deets because even though I respect my parents, at the end of the day its still my body and i have to make the choices that will affect me for the rest of my life. At least I think so

Wow, your age changes my answer a bit. Do you have a decent relationship with your father or grandparents? I personally would not go under life threatening surgery without telling the people I love, just in case (and people do die from this). I was not close to my father so I never would have told him, but I'd be heartbroken for my mother if I kept the surgery date from her and didn't make it.....just food for thought . I wish you the best!

thanks for all your opinions you guys' date=' i think i finally made my decision, I'll tell my two best friends, and if someone who i really trust asks me ill also tell them. Other people ill just say i went on a medically induced diet which is not a lie. I know I have to tell me father because I am under 18 (im 16) but i'll only tell him when i get my surgery date, even if he doesn't agree with me, he can't stop me, my parents are divorced and my moms the one who has insurance for me. I won't tell him what hospital its at or w/e deets because even though I respect my parents, at the end of the day its still my body and i have to make the choices that will affect me for the rest of my life. At least I think so[/quote']

I finally broke down and told my mother. She didn't agree, but now she knows. And, I feel better.

I've spent 5 years trying to get my WLS. I've been open and honest with everyone about my intent. And when it was finally a reality, I became very selective with whom I told. I was even annoyed with my boyfriend for telling his family about it. Today is day 12 post-op and I finally made it Facebook official. I'm not a poster child, but I am an advocate.

Wow, your age changes my answer a bit. Do you have a decent relationship with your father or grandparents? I personally would not go under life threatening surgery without telling the people I love, just in case (and people do die from this). I was not close to my father so I never would have told him, but I'd be heartbroken for my mother if I kept the surgery date from her and didn't make it.....just food for thought . I wish you the best!

I knew you'd say that!Yeah I am going to tell him before I have the surgery, and I think we have a pretty decent relationship, it's just the culture my dad comes from is very conservative, thats where we always have our disagreements lol. I think its because we're both aries so we clash alot. My mom is the complete opposite of him shes really new aged. I started considering it, and told her how important it was to me to be healthy and she decided to support me on it.I'm not sure he'll say no, but there's a good chance, and i don't want to deal with that before i even have my surgery date.

I finally broke down and told my mother. She didn't agree, but now she knows. And, I feel better.

Thats nice that you told her, I think you need the support of at least one person who's really close to you. Even if she doesn't want you to have it she'll prolly visit you and be there for you

I am I only telling those close to me now. As I do not want anyone trying to think they can change my mind. This is my choice and I am ready.

Afterwards I don't foresee a problem with me telling people. And those who may be judgemental at first will see how good and healthy I am looking, so then they will have no place to say anything.

I am actually using judgemental people to my advantage. I AM going to prove them wrong. I will make this a success. That is the way I see things. (although explaining it to everyone may get boring, maybe I can inspire someone else to try by sharing)