Hey y'all, long time no type. It's been six months since I had the vast majority of my stomach removed in a hospital in the Austrian countryside!

The highlights:

• I've lost up to 60lbs (down to 253).
  
• Went from a tight size 26 to a size 20.
  
• Am fitter & more able to exercise than ever before, even the last time I was this weight.
  
• I've been on & off very sick (sinus/upper respiratory issues, chronic fatigue syndrome, fibromyalgia -- all predate surgery, but I wish they'd improved more than they have)
  
• I'm worried I'll be stuck here forever
  

Here's a little pic montage! All photos are post-op. I forgot to take pre-op photos (yes really!). In the first ones, I've lost about 20lbs already. Newest ones were yesterday in a fitting room for my new sz 20 jeans.

I'm VERY excited about the size 20 jeans.

But I'm also super frustrated

This graph from the ticker factory kinda shows why:

The lowest weight I reached was 250 on Dec 1. My weight shot up 6-8 lbs overnight one night, and fluctuates wildly 3-4lbs on any given day. On Monday, after a transatlantic flight, I weighed 260. Today, 256.

Obviously this *can't* be fat. I mean, I don't always stay below 900 calories, but I surely haven't eaten 21,000 calories in a day or even a week or two weeks. And, as I keep trying to remind myself, 60lbs in just over 6 mos is a pretty good pace!

But the weeks on end of no real, positive movement are getting to me.

I struggle with exercise. I still have pain in the muscle areas under my incisions. I have back and hip problems due to an injury/genetic disorder. My ankles are screwed up from an injury, too.

Some days, just 10 minutes of aerobics will leave me exhausted & unable to do anything else, not even think… that's a chronic fatigue/fibromyalgia thing. I take D-Ribose and magnesium, & they help, but don't solve the problem.

And it seems like once a month, I get sick enough to require time off and antibiotics. Luckily I run my own biz, or I'd be sooo fired right now.

Post-op, I'm definitely better off than I was. I'm definitely *fitter* than I was, in terms of how far/how long I can walk, how fast I can walk, stairs, etc. But it hasn't seemed to help my immune system at all -- and it certainly hasn't made the CFS/FM go away

When I'm sick, I don't have the energy to be Super On The Ball Girl with what I eat. I don't eat fast food, and I don't binge… I feel so lucky that I never had an eating disorder, but I'm an "eat to live" girl and when I am so tired or ill, I just don't have the energy to be fussy. I'll eat whatever's easy… my ability to resist is low. It could be (part of) a sandwich or grilled chicken wrap, schnitzel (which is always breaded) or some chocolate. I feel like I'm still eating an appropriate *volume* -- when I weigh my food, I eat about 4 to 5 oz of Protein at a clip.

Anyway, that's my rave / rant. I'm so thrilled to be in the size 20. But worried & anxious & frustrated that it's not a size 16, or even 18. And worried I'll be stuck here for ages, since I've been stuck here for over a month. Worried that I don't "have what it takes" & won't ever, not physically and not mentally, to be hard core about it, and that I'd have to be hard core to get much further than this. Blargh!!

If you've got something to say that you think could help me, I'm all ears.

Wow...You look fantastic. I know you are frustrated, but look at how well you have done and how far you have come. I read the bootcamp basics too and plan on practicing them if I get stalled. Keep your chin up, you really do look great! I didn't take pre-pics either, but mostly because I am not photogenic at all and don't like pictures of me. Keep trying and don't give up.

Wow, you actually LOOK smaller than a 20! I pray things pick up for you.

I agree with Dooter.... you look much smaller than a 20 to me too!

Don't be so hard on numbers. I have lost VERY slowly compared to others, however, I have gone from a 20 to a 12 in 3.5 months. If I went solely by scale numbers, I would be incredibly discouraged.