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Post-op sex? Yes, please. Where can I find some?

--disgruntledly single

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I've been married 30 years this Oct. Haven't had sex in a couple of years. We're best of friends and the problem is all me. IDK why but I have no desire for it with him or anyone else. He thought the weight loss would move me in the right direction; nope. Now he thinks plastic surgery will do the trick. Can't say b/c I haven't had it yet, but probably doubtful in that regard. We don't discuss this. We get in bed and go to sleep. We're both 61 years old, not too old for sex, obviously. Does it bother me? No. Does it bother him, probably, but we deal with it and he channels his energy into projects here and there. No, he's not cheating on me, I know where he is all the time. IDK what to say except that it's not that big of an issue. I know I'm the odd one out. We used to do it a lot back in the day, but when I became fat, it stopped, that and he has a particular type of syndrome that causes the penis to curve -I forget the name - but the erection isn't as big and doesn't last, so I think I sort of lost interest. To get that "fired up" and then get no pay off, is sort of a waste of time, kwim? I know, way TOO MUCH information I realize. Just wanted to throw it out there in case anyone else is in my situation. :001_unsure:

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I've been married 30 years this Oct. Haven't had sex in a couple of years. We're best of friends and the problem is all me. IDK why but I have no desire for it with him or anyone else. He thought the weight loss would move me in the right direction; nope. Now he thinks plastic surgery will do the trick. Can't say b/c I haven't had it yet, but probably doubtful in that regard. We don't discuss this. We get in bed and go to sleep. We're both 61 years old, not too old for sex, obviously. Does it bother me? No. Does it bother him, probably, but we deal with it and he channels his energy into projects here and there. No, he's not cheating on me, I know where he is all the time. IDK what to say except that it's not that big of an issue. I know I'm the odd one out. We used to do it a lot back in the day, but when I became fat, it stopped, that and he has a particular type of syndrome that causes the penis to curve -I forget the name - but the erection isn't as big and doesn't last, so I think I sort of lost interest. To get that "fired up" and then get no pay off, is sort of a waste of time, kwim? I know, way TOO MUCH information I realize. Just wanted to throw it out there in case anyone else is in my situation. :001_unsure:

Can I just say that you are the hottest 61 year old I have ever seen! You go girl.

The love life sounds like it needs some work on both of your parts. You are too young to not be enjoying your sex life. But that is your call. I don't think it is too late though...nudge nudge.

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My boyfriend was out of town for the first 2 weeks after my surgery, so it worked out well in that aspect. I ended up waiting 2.5 weeks or so.

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I am loving these responses, thank you SO MUCH ladies! and, for the record-- there's no such thing as TMI in my book :scared0:

I'm SO WORRIED about my boobs. I know I have to just suck it up and get over it but I'm 23-- saggy boobs are going to be a real downer for me, I just know it. Not that mine are super fab to begin with, but they at least have shape and size on their side.

I'm lucky that the boyfriend had Bypass 2 years ago so it's not like I have to be super self conscious, but at the same time it makes it a little more difficult to talk about. He's a jokester and "couldn't care less if you're all saggy" which is nice albeit somewhat dismissive. I CARE!

Anyone had any luck keeping the sags at bay with water/exercise? Obviously I'm trying to keep my expectations reasonable, but I'm really hoping to not totally hate myself naked after this. Even fat I at least dig my butt and boobs.

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I think if you are 23 they should bounce back just fine. I wouldn't worry about saggy boobies at your age.

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