Well here is my story:

I went to TJ for my surgery as planned on 6/25. The hospital was super nice and I met the doctors and the staff who were all extremely well spoken and explained everything for me. I got settled into my room and they started my IV and took my blood samples for my blood tests. The anesthesiologist came in to explain her portion and we went over my medical history and current and past medications from the year. All I had left to do was my EKG. I asked the anesthsiologist if she could give me something for nerves and she said sure she had her bag with her and I clarified that it would not interfere with the EKG I was going to have she assured me it would not.

She shot the medication Midalozam straight into my IV like a gun. My mother who is an RN was right next to me on my right side along with the doctor. It burned a lot I got extremely dizzy and suddenly i felt my chest closing up the last words I squeeked out were I CANT BREATH. My mom caught the words and immediately her hand went to my chest. My body was paralyzed from my head to my toes. I could not make a sound I could not flinch a muscle all I could do was sit there in my own private torment begging for someone to start giving me air but I couldnt move let alone make a sound. I remember the doctor grabbing my chin and pulling my neck up telling me to take a deep breath and believe me I was trying so hard but my chest would not move. My mom is getting louder telling her SHE IS NOT BREATHING, the doctor ran to the other side of the bed and I remember feeling her put the oxygen mask over my face telling me to breath but I could do nothing and finally I passed out from lack of oxygen. I guess the doctor ran from the room and came back with the entire staff and the crash cart. They intubated me and pumped me with oxygen for the next three minutes during which time they threw my mom out of the room. The doctor gave me something to counteract the medication that had been given to me and within another minute I regained consciousness slowly. The first thing I remember is the metal tip of the laryngoscope (thing opening my airway up and protecting me from coming to and biting my tongue off) it was sort of gagging me though the air felt like heaven. They were all saying my name and telling me to breath...the whole room was just trying to coax me. I came too twitching and I remember them pulling the air bag away from my mouth because i was taking tiny breaths but I was thinking oh god put it back I am not getting enough air on my own. I thought crap I come back only to still not be able to breath I would rather be passed back out, but after another thirty seconds I was able to let my head roll to the side and saliva was dripping from my mouth. It felt so damn good to be able to do something that I was meaning to do. After they suctioned my airway and pulled the tube from my throat they threw the regular oxygen mask on me to help me get enough pure air into my lungs and they starting trying to get me to talk...they asked me how I felt and I mumbled out something then I just said MY MOM and they went to go get her. She walked in and then I finally started crying. I continued to be monitored and given oxygen for the next half hour where all my vitals returned to normal but I of course was an emotional wreck.

Now before anyone speculates where I had surgery I will say I am not going to be sharing that info but I assure you it was not Dr. Almanza's clinic. The doctors and the clinic I went to are great but I think two things were a fluke..first off I obviously can't tolerate that medicine and nobody could have predicted that and two the doctor administered it way to fast...those things should be titrated (given slowly) over a period of two minutes. I think the doctor learned a valuable lesson regarding that and had no way to know i personally would respond that way.

I decided to come home without going further I was in no shape mentally to have surgery and quite honestly I was too scared to have another drug pumped into me at that point.

I have been home since late that same day and am dealing with anxiety about it. I wake myself thinking I can't breath and last night it was so bad I had a panic attack that ended me up at my local ER where the doctor assured me that I was not going to suddenly stop breathing again but that the medication has it's own sort of withdrawl symptoms that can cause anxiety on top of the experience I had.

I am bummed because I really wanted the surgery but I am happy to be alive at this point and think I am going to give it a go at doing it on my own. My BMI is not that high and I think it is worth another shot at this point. Who knows down the road if I will do it, but I can't imagine right now I would have any support of my family in choosing to go back. I think if I would not have asked for anything for nerves the surgery would have went off without a hitch but I like to think I can read the signs and deduce that now is not the right time.

I wish everyone luck but I wanted to report back just to share my experience. That complication percentage is small but it sucks to the statistic and it could have cost my life.

From your description of the event, I am wondering if it really was midazolam that was given. It is not technically a paralytic. It was either not the medication you were told or it was an ungodly dose. I am just glad you are doing well physically now.

I know it will take a while for you to overcome the emotional trauma, and I imagine your mom is still very gun shy, too. I do hope you will reconsider the sleeve at some point. From reading here, it seems to a positive life change for many people. My daughter was sleeved by Dr. Aceves on 7-1-10 and I am scheduled for 8-12-10. Maybe letting more time pass and doing a little more research during that time will help your confidence return.

At any rate, I wish you good health and happiness.

Kathe

Sorry this is so long! Just had to share my bad experience with a paralydic drug, but it was AFTER surgery.

I had 2 herniated discs repaired. The surgery lasted a little over 1/2 an hour. I woke up in the recovery room and saw the lady who was in the pre-op area with me and a nurse. I was going in and out of consciousness, and I believe what was waking me was the fact that my breathing would stop.

I would then wake up enough to gasp out the words "I can't breathe" to the nurse. She kept asking if I was in pain. I would say, "no, I can't breath". She then put a cold wash cloth on my forehead and asked if I was in pain. I continued to gasp out the words, "I can't breathe".

I heard her tell someone after what seemed to be an eternity to go get the anestheologist (who by the way was Russian and didn't speak English very well). I remember him asking me "are you in pain?". I told him AGAIN, "I can't breathe".

The next thing I remember is waking up and vomiting. (I got the recovery room notes and they put me under with Morphine) I kept vomiting, even when I was being wheeled to my room. (I have NEVER remembered the trip to my room after surgery before) and I remember apologizing to the guy transporting me when I would vomit.

I NEVER had nausea after surgery before, ever or since that time. Finally after vomiting for an hour or so after waking up, the nurse gave me something for nausea. It was the type of Morphine they gave me after surgery that caused the nausea.

That night (or the next?) the anesthologist came into my room and explained to me what happened. He misunderstood the doctor when he was told how long the surgery would last and he gave me to much of the paralylic meds. He tried to counteract it with another drug, but that drug obviously woke me up before I was able to breathe well enough on my own.

I say all that to say that, before my next 4 surgeries (except the 1st one that was an emergency surgery) I was able to talk with the anesthologist and explained what happened to me. I never ask for something to calm my nerves, I guess cause I know once I hit the table I'm in lala land in about 2 to 3 minutes. :svengo:

Presurgery is a scary, scary time and I'm no braver than anyone else. Maybe being a Christian and knowing where I'll be if something goes wrong helps.

God bless and I hope only the best for you!

thanks so much for responding with info re: Anesthesia i really appreciated it

i'm glad your okay..............did you have the vertical sleeve surgery?

terri

Sorry this is so long! Just had to share my bad experience with a paralydic drug, but it was AFTER surgery.

I had 2 herniated discs repaired. The surgery lasted a little over 1/2 an hour. I woke up in the recovery room and saw the lady who was in the pre-op area with me and a nurse. I was going in and out of consciousness, and I believe what was waking me was the fact that my breathing would stop.

I would then wake up enough to gasp out the words "I can't breathe" to the nurse. She kept asking if I was in pain. I would say, "no, I can't breath". She then put a cold wash cloth on my forehead and asked if I was in pain. I continued to gasp out the words, "I can't breathe".

I heard her tell someone after what seemed to be an eternity to go get the anestheologist (who by the way was Russian and didn't speak English very well). I remember him asking me "are you in pain?". I told him AGAIN, "I can't breathe".

The next thing I remember is waking up and vomiting. (I got the recovery room notes and they put me under with Morphine) I kept vomiting, even when I was being wheeled to my room. (I have NEVER remembered the trip to my room after surgery before) and I remember apologizing to the guy transporting me when I would vomit.

I NEVER had nausea after surgery before, ever or since that time. Finally after vomiting for an hour or so after waking up, the nurse gave me something for nausea. It was the type of Morphine they gave me after surgery that caused the nausea.

That night (or the next?) the anesthologist came into my room and explained to me what happened. He misunderstood the doctor when he was told how long the surgery would last and he gave me to much of the paralylic meds. He tried to counteract it with another drug, but that drug obviously woke me up before I was able to breathe well enough on my own.

I say all that to say that, before my next 4 surgeries (except the 1st one that was an emergency surgery) I was able to talk with the anesthologist and explained what happened to me. I never ask for something to calm my nerves, I guess cause I know once I hit the table I'm in lala land in about 2 to 3 minutes. :thumbup1:

Presurgery is a scary, scary time and I'm no braver than anyone else. Maybe being a Christian and knowing where I'll be if something goes wrong helps.

God bless and I hope only the best for you!

Wow Jeanie it sucks not being able to breath it is such a scary feeling. I remember the point where I was getting a tiny bit of air when they stopped bagging me and I thought damn I am going to pass out again!

I also do not handle morphine very well. I learned that from a surgery I had a couple years ago. I have to have half the normal dose and they have to give it to me with some anti nausea meds.

I am so glad your ok and wish you the best on your sleeve surgery.

UPDATE!:::

I just received a copy of my anesthesia report from UCLA when I had surgery a couple years ago and low-and-behold. I was given Midazolam for nerves before that surgery. Actually i was given the exact same dosage that the anesthesiologist on this incident states she gave me...I tolerated it beautifully, I knew I had something for nerves before they wheeled me down the hall for surgery and it had made me feel really lose and floaty. I had no idea what they had given me and now I know. So I am 99% certain now that it was in fact a paralytic I was given by mistake ..just like quite a few medically trained folks here pointed out.

I wish I had some recourse, the PTSD sucks. Though I do feel better now about having surgery again in August. I am taking this report so the doc can use it as a guideline if it is compatible.

time to move forward!

I bet it is very comforting to have those facts though. Good for you, for taking the initiative to find out for yourself.

I was scheduled to be sleeved Oct 8 in Mexico and have cancelled at least temporarily because of a bad reaction to a paralytic. I unexpectedly had to have surgery here in the states. I was told I would be intubated but would never know it bc I would be intubated in the OR after I was out and extubated in the OR before I woke up. Well, I woke up in recovery 2 hours later than than they expected. The last half hour of that I was completely lucid, aware and could hear everything that was going on, but I could not move a muscle. I was intubated, felt like I was choking, felt that I couldnt breathe on my own and was praying that. Ent kept working. I found out later that I got 1/3 of a dose of a non depolaryzing paralytic rocuronium(sp?). I can only imagine if I had gone to Mexico and gotten a fl dose! Divine intervention. I have received a letter from the anesthesiologist stating I am never to have a paralytic of any kind again. He did state that it's possible to do surgeries of all kinds without them. I have to get my courage up to try surgery again so I feel for you. I've been obsessing about the feeling of not being able to breathe on my own or. communicate that I was in there. It's scary. Anyone who says this surgery is the easy way out should be slapped. We are willing to put our lives on the line to try to change our lives for the better. Anyway. Good luck. Hopefully we will both be sleeved, alive and healthier than ever some day.