Scared of Failure.

[jsm 1]

My story is similar to many out here. I?m 53 and have fought weight issues my entire life. Childhood through high school was hell. The summer before college, I lost a lot of weight and started my freshmen year looking ?normal?. I was able to maintain the ?normal? range for several years, then began the yo-yoing after marriage. Had 2 children, and then this wonder drug called Fen Phen became a hot item. Again, I became semi-normal, until the risks outweighed the benefits. Since that time, I have gained over 85 lbs and just can?t seem to loose it.

Several years ago, I started looking into WLS, specifically the band. After doing the research on the band, and following several individual blogs and forums, I knew the band was not for me. Earlier this year, while cruising the WLS boards, I stumbled on the Sleeve. This option looked encouraging to me and I started the research. I felt like my prayers had been answered. Additionally, I had gained more weight and reached the BMI required by my insurance company for WLS without requiring other medical conditions. I found a highly qualified surgeon who has an excellent pre and post surgery program, and have begun the clearance process.

To date, I have been blessed and everything has been falling into place. My PCP fully supports me. The psychiatrist and cardiologist I went to also support my decision for WLS. So what is my problem? I?m scared to death that I will fail again even with the sleeve. I know that the sleeve is only a tool, and I will have to do the work required to make this successful. But what if I fail like I have so many times before? Honestly, I?m not trying to set myself up for failure. I?m just scared in getting my hopes up for ever being a ?normal? weight (not to be confused with the Hollywood standard). Looking at the accomplishments of MacMadam, Wasa and others, I feel I can?t go wrong. But then, I?ve said that every time I?ve started some sort of weight loss program.

Is this paranoia to be expected? Any words of wisdom from those that have been there done that?

Thanks in advance for your kind words and support.

Hugs,

JoAnne

[shanda7182 5]

First of all welcome to VST

I have not been sleeved yet, however, those fears are normal. But just think about it, getting the VSG is suppose to help decease the ghrelin hormone that produces hunger, some people report little or no appetite. That in itself, is a major plus. Also, it significantly reduces the size of your stomach limiting its capacity. So those two factors are very good! I think as long as we are determined to do well and we work our tool, we will be fine!:biggrin0:

Although, it will still be a challenge, we will have a little helper to get us through the tough times.

Take Care

[mutti471975 0]

jsm -

I am one week out and I also was very scared - still a small amount. But I can tell you this. I've gotten to two different restuarants with my kiddos and hubby and I'm not even interested in their food. I've lost 22.5 lbs in two weeks = one week preop and one week postop.

I believe this sleeve will work for you if you follow the program... Now I have a friend that had the complete bypass a week before myself and she's gained weigh but in talking with her she's been eating small amounts of food the first week - hello... my doctor doesn't have me eating pureed food until three weeks out.

You must be completed and work the tool.

Hope this gives you some insight.

[Tiffykins 672]

Hi JoAnne and welcome to the forum.

I honestly think this is more than a program. It's a complete lifestyle and mindset change. For me, the sleeve forces me to make better decisions. I have yet to feel "real hunger", and I'm 3 months out from my revision. I had a lot of faith in the band in the beginning because it did work until I lost restriction. When I started researching my revision (due to complications with the band), I knew the sleeve would work because it's immediate restriction. I struggled with my weight for years, and I decided that being fat came with much higher risks than having surgery again. I absolutely love the restriction I have when I eat. I have had several ups and downs with my revision post-op, but I have no regrets.

The sleeve works. I won't deny that every day brings either a struggle or success. I have my bad days, but they are fewer as every week passes. Some days it's easy to make bad choices in what I put in my mouth, but the next day I make a better decision. I have to make the effort for the sleeve to work. I could eat ice cream, mashed potatoes, and junk food every day, but I would not be using the sleeve as it was intended.

I hope ramble of mine helps some.

[MacMadame 81]

Your fears are very normal. And sane too because there are people who don't get to goal with the sleeve even if most people do fine.

Will you be one of them? First, the odds for success are definitely in your favor. WLS works most of the time for most people. Second, there are some questions you can ask yourself that can help you access whether the sleeve is the tool that will do the job for you. Such as:

-Am I ready and willing to change my relationship with food?

-Do I have any underlying emotional issues to work on?

-When I go on diets, do I generally lose weight or do I find it very difficult to lose weight even when I severely restrict my calories and exercise on top of it

-Is my BMI under 60?

If you are ready to change your relationship with food and work on any emotional issues, you will be well set up to succeed with any WLS. Note: you don't have to solve all your issues prior to surgery to succeed, but the sooner you start working on them, the better.

If you can lose weight when you restrict your calories and up your exercise, then you are well set up to succeed with a sleeve.

IME the people who don't succeed with WLS, in general, are the ones who sabotage themselves due to unresolved issues. The ones who don't succeed with a sleeve, in particular, are the ones whose bodies don't lose much weight even when they are consuming many less calories than they burn -- maybe they have insulin resistance, maybe they have PCOS, maybe their metabolism is very, very slow. These people need a stronger surgery such as the duodenal switch to combat their body's inability to lose with calorie restriction alone.

Some people with very high BMIs also have trouble losing more than 100-150 pounds with a sleeve. Sometimes it's because they also have unresolved issues and/or trouble losing weight with calorie restriction alone. But sometimes it's just because they have so much to lose and their bodies fight losing that much. These people may also need something with more firepower such as a DS.

[jsm 1]

Thanks to all for your insightful input. You have reminded me why I chose the sleeve in the first place. I need to make up a cheat sheet of all the Pros, and pull it out whenever the "scared" feelings stir.

I really am up for the challenges and lifestyle changes required to make the sleeve successful. In the past 2 months, I have replaced all soda with water/crystal light. Huge accomplishment for a diet soda junkie of 30 years!

Hopefully in the next 6 - 8 weeks I will have completed all the requirements, received approval from insurance, and have a surgery date.

Again, thanks for taking the time to respond to me and I look forward to sharing my journey with you.

Hugs,

JoAnne