Oh my am I having a dilemma. I really need some sincere advise here.

Today my surgeon/friend came to our house and I informed him that I would be banded next week. He asked who and where and I told him. He advised me to be more patient and wait until his friend/mentor/ the super surgeon who has banded over 5000 patients can do it. He said that i am like his sister and if anything were to happen to me then he would feel terrible. He would not give me a reason, just that in his opinion the surgeon does not have enough experience. He said trust him on it. So I pushed and asked why, did anything go wrong with his patients. He said the surgeon who is suppose to band me put some bands on people and the band failed and he has to then bypass them. This is what gets me. My friend/surgeon really is not an experienced band surgeon, he has only done 3 and can only do them with his proctor who is busy running around the kingdom training. I do not see the band as failing these people. What I believe is that these people were clueless on how to use the band as a tool. I know these people and I do not thank the vast majority of them can handle any WLS...not now. The surgeon who is to band me thought that I was better off with the bypass and now I know why. He is probably thinking that I will screw up like the other patients. I am different. I am informed. They do not have the resources I have (english support forums and online information...it's not in arabic and the doctors are not really explaining how to use the band they are just putting it on and telling them not to eat sweets).

My dh said that he is consiodering not giving me the money now and 'forbidding' me from having the surgury this week. He did make a nice compromise. He said to find out where super doc is and he will fly me to whereever he is to be banded. I thought about it and remembered that when I was calling about to see which of the private hospitals banded, i spoke to one surgeon and asked him if he knew super doc. he saiod that he had many of his patients because they are left with no after care. He said he does not like taking other peoples patients but he will not just leave them out there. He said this doc is simply banding patients...that's it. most of the hospitals he is going aroun do not have the proper set-up and he is just visting them banding there overweight patients but there is nobody there to follow up with after care. So if I did get banded by him then I would have to weight for my surgeon/friend's hospital to get all their equipment and there is no telling when this will happen and in the mean time i am just blowing up. Also my surgeon griend has no experience with aftercare and would be learning on me so to speak. He would never endanger me...but still. The surgeon who is suppose to band me next week has done 90 bands, no complications. i do not consider it his fault that those other patients went back for bypasses. heck if it had anything to do with him I'm sure they would have seeked out another doctor for the bypass. my dh thinks it was professional consideration or ethics that kept my friend/surgeon from perhaps telling me something that he knows about the surgeon. Dh is spooked now and is talking crazy about just locking the kitchen door until the other surgeon is available. He makes me sick with his lack of understanding.

I want to go ahead with my surgury date, but I feel my friend/surgeon will see me as impatient and foolish. I am honestly not even thinking what if something happens. I like this hospital much better than the other. The doc seems very informed about the band and how it works. I was pleased with him. My surgeon/friend is not as informed and therefore I ythink he may be basing his desicion on something that has nothing to do with the surgeon, unless of course he isnt telling me everything. He asked me to just trust him.

okay guys HELP! please do not spare me anything. tell me like it is. i have been known to be stubborn all my life, but I do take good advice into consideration. Doesn't mean I'll change my mind but at least it gives me something to think about. I mean honestly, what is the worst that could happen...ok rather what are the odds that the worst can happen and arent the risk just as great with anybody?

O Lord help me...

Good Job Kathy and fiveholts!!! I agree completely. Like both of you, I had my surgery in Mexico but had my aftercare lined up locally well in advance of my surgery. Aftercare is easily as important as the banding. What good is a band if you have no restriction and nobody who will do your fills for an affordable price if at all. If nothing else call or email Inamed and see what they have to say about the various doctors your considering. I made lists when I was making my surgeon decision too and it helped. I agree about your hubby being your "partner" too. You NEED his support and his understanding. Your on the same team. Best wishes to you, Teresa

As I've said in other posts, Neurosurgeons and Cardiologists think they sit in the right hand of God, and the rest of them are fighting for their spot on the left hand. I'm saying this as a retired nurse who dealth with doctors most of her life. There are some exceptions, but they are far and few between.

fiveholts that was excellent advice! my dh understands my desire to this and has accepted it. i think the biggestest factor for him are trust issues. he trust that our friend will look out for my best interest. he is not so sure of the other doc. superdoc has the most experience out of everyone because he is a training doc. however, i wonder how many complications he has had. i mean he has banded over 5000...i fiond it hard to believe that they have all been perfect. not to mention many of them are seeking private docs for their aftercare so there is nobody to keep track of how many slips/erosions or other complications he's had. the doc who is scheduled to band me was trained in australia and has only banded 90 and does their after care...he claims no slips or erosions.

i really appreciate you offering another perspective to balance things. on one hand i have legallykristen saying that this is typical of surgeons to ewant you to take their recommendation and on the other hand i have you saying...listen and take heed. whAT A DESICION! i really what to do this and had my hopes up high for this week, but i do not want a riskier procedure than neccessary. at the same time their is no ganrantee that super doc will band be or when/where. i'm desparate. my kids are bored and tired of me being to tired to do things with them. i hate being to tired. i cant even stand up and prepare a meal for my family. i have a live inmaid who does everything and i hTE IT. I FEEL LIKE I AM DISABLED BECAUSE of my weight. i do not think i am in the right frame of mind to make this desicision. i still want to do it but now i'm scared.

kabeerah, when I first started surfing the boards about lapbanding, the magic number I heard was "50". If your doc has done fewer than 50 band placements, think twice. The first few band placements are proctored by Inamed-approved surgeons, then there's a learning curve up to about 50, after that, it's old hat, so to speak.

There is NOTHING scientific or etched in stone about that number, that I have been able to gather, so take it for what it's worth, but 90 band surgeries is pretty good. Much of his experience may come in the way of Laporoscopic surgery in general. If this is the case, he's even more ahead of the game. It's hard to work on someones innerds with poles and pincers while looking at a TV screen...if your doc for next week has plenty of practice doing laporoscopic surgery, 90 bands is not a horrible number. IMO. Just something ELSE to think about, LOL

Experience and Aftercare are most important with the band! Maybe look at other options, if you are not comfortable with EITHER the experience or aftercare of surgeon! Perhaps, there are other surgeons within driving distance, that can take good care of you??

Shawn

I am at work and read through this post really fast and I have PMS and am easily ticked off... so bare with me if I make an a** out of myself.

One thing I have learned is to listen to people I trust that are in the field. When I started investigating plastic surgeons, I asked my very trusted lap band surgeon who HE recommended because he knows a hell of a lot more about it than any friend, husband, etc.

LISTEN TO YOUR FRIEND. Do not be in such a hurry that you have surgery with an innexperienced surgeon just because you can't wait. All the follow up in the world won't help if your band isn't properly placed in the beginning. My guess is that if you talk to the surgeon's office that your friend suggested he may have relationships with follow up care offices in your area.

As for your husband saying he won't give you the money to have the surgery if you don't go to a different doctor- why the hell is he in charge of what you do with your body? Man, he is in for a rude awakening when you get the band, lose weight, gain some self esteem and kick his condescending, controlling butt to the curb.

This your body. Your life. Your band future.

Megan