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"you're Not Going To Lose Any More Weight, Right?"

This is one of the most amusing things I experience since having lost so much weight. When discussing weight loss with people, just about everyone wants to be discouraging about me losing any additional weight. I say I have more weight to lose and they say, "What? Where? Don't lose any more, you'll be too skinny."

I'm still technically overweight. I don't have much to lose before I'm in the "normal" range, according to the BMI, but I'd still like to be smaller than I am. I know my body. When I'm wearing clothes, I look ok. But that's wearing spanx and flattering clothing. And because my weight is appropriately distributed. Without clothes, not so good, lol.

Does anyone else get comments like that from people? "Great job with your weight loss, but don't lose any more." I just... never thought I'd get to a point where I'd hear that from people.

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  • I hear those comments all the time mostly from relatives."Eat" is what comes in their mouth the moment they see me.It is a habit.But the most weird comment was the one i heard last week from a new col

  • horsegirl315
    horsegirl315

    Isn't it funny how people are so fast to say you're too skinny, to your face. But when you're heavy, it was said/thought behind your back? Can't wait to be on the skinny side

  • My mom told me at Thanksgiving that I was at a good stage of my weight loss and did not need to lose any more....I then had to inform her that I (at that time) was still in the 200's. She could not b

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Good for you. Isn't this what all of this is about?

Yes, I've gotten that before. My response is that people are used to seeing me overweight, so their view of normal for me is an unhealthy view. When I get to a healthy weight and am there for a while, people will look back at pictures of me now and think, WOW, look how uncomfortable you looked then!

Or, "thank you for your concern, but my doctor and I have set a healthy goal within my proper BMI range." Done, end of discussion. "You'll be too skinny" is not a diagnosis of any disease. And unless you are truly underweight, it is not a fact, either.

Everything is relative and a matter of perspective. When I used to do my laundry, my size 18 to 20 pants and 2X shirts were normal. As I lost to size 10, they seemed so small. Now the size 10s are normal and when I see a size 18 they seem so large because I am used to the 10s.

  • Author

I've been wearing size 9 jeans (juniors size) for a few weeks. Since April, I've gone down from a size 17 in the same kind of jeans.

Yesterday I had to buy a pair of black slacks for my seasonal second job because all I normally wear is jeans. I had a pair of the same pants in August and they were a size 12. The size I bought yesterday is a size 6!! I'm pretty sure these pants are larger than their size states, but still.... size 6 felt pretty good to buy, lol.

That's wonderful! Congratulations! I think people sometimes just don't know what to say, so they say things like, don't lose any more! It's a kind of approval of where you are now and encouragement. Talking about someone's weight is a slippery slope.

I have been maintaining for nearly 2 years now, and people still ask me if I have lost more weight. I say no, they say really? I say yep. They say, well, your face is changing.

Gee thanks, does that mean I am looking old??? 001_tt2.gif

People are not used to dealing with someone successfully losing weight and keeping it off. It doesn't happen much. So, I try to say things that put them at ease if they put their feet in their mouths.

I get those comments too. From my mother, my friends, my siblings....virtually everyone but my kids! The one that really got me was my lapband surgeon! Last April (the last time I saw him) he told me I looked great and didn't need to lose any more weight. I was still in the 190's at the time. Normal BMI for me is 125-169 and I'm currently hovering around the top end. I asked him if he was kidding. He's a weight loss doctor and thinks I should stop with a BMI of 28???

That is bad!

My colorectal surgeon is obsessed with me gaining weight, as i dropped a lot during cancer treatment, most of hich has gone back on. My bmi is 21, perfectly healthy. He freaks coz you can see ribs in my chest, thats nmy shape, im a classic pear - small shoulders, small breast, no fat on upper but comfortably cushioned rear! He says stuff like "you looked great when you first walked into my office" Well, im only about 5 lb lighter, ive regained ten much needed pounds, im a healthy normal weight, but i think its like howvwe love plump children, people want to see a cancer patient plump up! In truth, that would only increase my risk of recurrence!

People lke to see you hv some success, but when you truly change to a very different body they are disturbed by it. I think were genetically programmed to connect weight loss with disease maybe?

I hear those comments all the time mostly from relatives."Eat" is what comes in their mouth the moment they see me.It is a habit.But the most weird comment was the one i heard last week from a new collegue.She was saying how desperately she needs to lose 10 pounds.Then she looks at me and she says.."well you obviously know nothing about diets,but i really need to lose weight".It was a shock for me and to tell you the truth subconsciously i thought she was mocking me.Killing the fat kid inside you is not so easy..

  • Author

I get those comments too. From my mother, my friends, my siblings....virtually everyone but my kids! The one that really got me was my lapband surgeon! Last April (the last time I saw him) he told me I looked great and didn't need to lose any more weight. I was still in the 190's at the time. Normal BMI for me is 125-169 and I'm currently hovering around the top end. I asked him if he was kidding. He's a weight loss doctor and thinks I should stop with a BMI of 28???

I saw my surgeon a week ago and he asked if I was going to lose any more weight. I said yes, that I wanted to lose around 20lbs more. He's like, "Oh, really? Well, you look great where you're at." (or similar). I brought up how I was still considered overweight and he said the BMI doesn't take into account muscle, etc... as if I have any! So it seems like even he was basically saying I don't need to lose any more.

I get that I don't NEED to, for health reasons.... but I'd like to for personal reasons. I would like to have a fit, toned body that's free of excess fat.

  • Author

I hear those comments all the time mostly from relatives."Eat" is what comes in their mouth the moment they see me.It is a habit.But the most weird comment was the one i heard last week from a new collegue.She was saying how desperately she needs to lose 10 pounds.Then she looks at me and she says.."well you obviously know nothing about diets,but i really need to lose weight".It was a shock for me and to tell you the truth subconsciously i thought she was mocking me.Killing the fat kid inside you is not so easy..

Don't I know it!

I know people now that I didn't know when I was fat. One guy said to me recently, "You have a great figure for a 28 year old. Most women start to let themselves go," (he's 22 and apparently not that smart in what things to say to women). I laughed and told him I was unletting myself go. I told him later on how much I used to weigh and it was hard for him to believe it. People say to me, "I can't picture you being over 200lbs". It's interesting to hear that.

I see people looking at me in a different way than they used to. To them, I have always been as I am now. To me, I was very different.... and it's still very hard to accept myself as I am now and not still want to believe that people will be revolted by me if I'm flirty. Every time someone new compliments me or asks me out, I am surprised.

I have people telling me all the time not to loose anymore weight because I'm to skinny as it is, and it really bothers me because why didn't these same people ever come up to me when I weighed over 300 pounds and voice their concern about how unhealthy it was being that big? I have heard skinny people in the past say that it hurt their feelings when people would call them toooo skinny and I thought yah right I wish I had that problem but now I get it.

I hear the same thing! I have lost 100lbs, but I am just into now not being overweight. I have"fluff"as my grandson says. It is mostly in my stomach and my chin. My granddaughter suggested that I could get plastic surgery on my neck, so I can look younger, too! Haha! Good luck to us all. Karen

Isn't it funny how people are so fast to say you're too skinny, to your face. But when you're heavy, it was said/thought behind your back? Can't wait to be on the skinny side smile.png

  • Author

Isn't it funny how people are so fast to say you're too skinny, to your face. But when you're heavy, it was said/thought behind your back? Can't wait to be on the skinny side smile.png

Absolutely true!!

No one ever said anything to my face when I was overweight, other than my mom. You know people saw it and probably judged you for it, but no one said anything. I knew I was fat and I knew I was unhealthy. I was glad that no one said anything because I don't think it would have helped me at all - it would have made me feel worse and more ashamed of myself.

My drive to lose weight is encouraged by positive feedback, not negative feedback.

  • Author

As of today.... I am officially in a normal weight range. I am no longer considered overweight according to the BMI. The funny thing is that when I went to type my weight into the calculator, I typed "258" instead of "158". I caught myself immediately after, but it made me think.

Yesterday a guy at work told me that he thought I weighed 100 pounds. 100 pounds?!? I scoffed and laughed and he said I couldn't weigh more than 120. I didn't tell him my actual weight, but he seemed shocked that I weighed more than 120. I don't think I look like I weigh 120, but people had been telling me for months they thought I weighed no more than 130. And I've lost more weight since then.

Another guy told me I was a skinny b***h (as a girl would say to another... he's gay). I said, "Not yet" and he said, "Yeah, you are, now."

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